Thu, 23 Feb 2012, 2:10pm PST
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Can I tweet about it?
Since they're my rules, sure - go ahead & tweet about it. I would think it would be hard to hire a hitman in 140 characters. I could be wrong.
I thought being a vegetarian gave you peaceful thoughts and made you less aggressive and violent.
Based on the photo, I'd say that being a vegetarian causes you to have buggy eyes and appear mentally ill.
Fri, 24 Feb 2012, 5:04am PST
One of the funniest things people do what trying to hire a hit man is tell them how they should do the deed. Trust me a real professional assassin knows how to kill someone and get away with it. They don't need your hair brained ideas just how to do it and how avoid getting caught.
Actually unless your connected in the MOB, the best hit man (or hit person) is yourself. This is the easiest way not to get caught hiring an undercover police officer. You cut out the middle man and you get to put those well thought out ideas of how to do it and get away with it to the test.
Fri, 24 Feb 2012, 5:44am PST
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I once got away with murder. It was a perfect plan.
Back in 1987, I was a writing teacher. My wife, Kate Mulgrew, stole my book and put her name on it. She became a big celebrity, appearing on Oprah, where she referred to me as "a beast".
I met this guy Owen, who lived with an abusive Neanderthal mother and has visions of poisoning her, sticking a scissors in her head - you name it. Well, Owen got a clever idea after seeing "Strangers on a Train" by Alfred Hitchcock. He went to Honolulu where my wife was and while she's leaning over a boat railing trying to get an earring, Owen stands behind her and creeps up and pushes her overboard.
Soon the police are looking for me for questioning. Having not been anywhere in Honolulu, I was quickly removed as a suspect, but Owen wasn't done with me. He came to me and demanded that I live up to my end of a bargain that I had no idea I made. You see, Owen had killed my wife. In exchange, he expected me to throw his momma from the train. It was the perfect crime because neither of us had motive in the other's case.