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Great Idea for a PatNet T-Shirt


By APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich   Follow   Thu, 17 May 2012, 8:27am   5,491 views   59 comments
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This will make grand pubah Pat famous and rich:

A patnet t-shirt that says:

TAKE A BITE OUT OF CRIME:
EAT A REALTOR®!

Who would not want to buy one?

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  1. Patrick


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    20   12:44pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    I think "Take a bite out of your mortgage" is pretty good. Mortgage debt is something most people have a negative reaction to.

    Or maybe "Take a bite out of your mortgage payment" because those monthly payments are even closer to home, so to speak.

    errc says

    Eating realtards would also be promoting better health, over the crap the USDA spews about eating grains. What's not to love,,,,animal fat and protein yum

    Hmmm, that's another good angle. How to put it best?

  2. zzyzzx


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    21   12:57pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Patrick says

    Cafepress overcharges the buyer

  3. PockyClipsNow


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    22   2:07pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    dont forget u need 3 versions:
    Realtor(or Real Estate Agent)
    Banker
    Mortgage Broker

  4. Patrick


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    23   2:20pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    Good idea to have different versions.

    Still looking for that perfect verbiage though, something I'm sure will survive a lawsuit.

    "Eat a Realtor. They taste like chicken."

  5. errc


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    24   2:30pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    Realtwhores. Its what's for dinner

  6. FortWayne


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    25   2:33pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Patrick says

    Save yourself some money.
    Avoid a realtor.

  7. EBGuy


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    26   2:53pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Relitter or Real Estate Professional or Used Home Salesperson

  8. bubblesitter


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    27   9:36pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    I can't wait to get one for myself. Thanks for the great idea,AF.

  9. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    28   10:29pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    Take a Bite Outta Financial Crime: Eat a Realtor®

    Who wouldn't wear one proudly?

  10. ANIBOY


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    29   10:42pm Thu 17 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    If you need t-shirts, we can print them for you.

  11. errc


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    30   3:58am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Save housing
    Go (soylent) green

    Then have an image of a chipper a la universal soldier and patrick tossing a realtor in there

  12. ArtimusMaxtor


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    31   4:47am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    I like to watch Dragnet sometimes. Strange I know. Friday is so fucking straight faced I can't take it. Theres something really fucked up when you can keep a straight face like that in my opinion. In the episode I watched. Someone strangled a Real Estate Broker and took her Credit Cards. It was Mrs. Birnam Of Birnam Reality of course. Her name was changed to protect her innocence I assume. Even though she was on a slab. I guess that qualifies as innocence.

    I'm human I have to smile or have some kind of fucking expression. I assume the BTK killer dosen't have much of an expression. I know Wolf Blister dosen't have one. Many newscasters don't I guess reading a teleprompter does that I don't know. Scary to think someone writes whats on the teleprompter. The guy reading it (newscaster) just rehearses it. Has no idea of content many times. I know a cameraman. Thats exactly what happens. Of course throw that into division. The result more fodder and confusion in the sense of the believers. They make off into the night undetected. Never let a swindler make a believer out of you they will take everything you have even from a distance. With slight of hand they will vary the game. Don't ever make the mistake that they have had their sociopathic sickness for stealing, cured.

  13. KILLERJANE


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    32   6:24am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    I don't eat eat junk food. Leaves a residue in mouth.

  14. KILLERJANE


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    33   6:25am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    This is gonna piss off the vegans and fruitarians.

  15. ArtimusMaxtor


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    34   6:39am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Patrick and Apocolypse for President and VP not nessearly in that order. For a people that want honesty. I will be the Secretary of Offense for anyone that gets on my nerves. We can have open borders. Hey, how do you defend 7000 miles of border anyway. Let the women of Montreal in so's I can get some oh la la. Get all the people that just don't get it a job pushing shopping carts. After all what's the point trying to xplain a monetary system thats nothing but lending and loans that extracts their labor and fixed pricing or price fixing for someone that wants to turn their mind into a pretzel. Lou Dobbs can drive the limo with an arrow through his head, while I sit on his head sipping champagne with a French babe next to me. Jennifer Love Hewitt can be the Secretary of Commerce and boobs.

  16. errc


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    35   7:07am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Yes! Work visas for those lovely women of montreal. Now we're making some progress. I love progressives! They taste better then realwhores too

  17. Patrick


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    36   9:00am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    bubblesitter says

    I can't wait to get one for myself. Thanks for the great idea,AF.

    It is a brilliant slogan, but it's one that would almost certainly get me sued. I need something just as pointed, but legally more defensible.

  18. jvolstad


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    37   9:03am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Realtor meat being processed?

  19. errc


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    38   9:50am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Patrick says

    bubblesitter says

    I can't wait to get one for myself. Thanks for the great idea,AF.

    It is a brilliant slogan, but it's one that would almost certainly get me sued. I need something just as pointed, but legally more defensible.

    Just add in that lawyers are for dessert,,,that should fend them off. Not to mention that lawyers are probably more to blame for our current situation then realwhores

    People keep suggesting that what we need to do to fix our systemic problems is to take the money out of politics. Id argue that there would still be politics in our money, and we'd still be in the same boat. Other populist crap of late includes the nutty idea to "take the profit motive" out of "healthcare". How about we take the profit motive out of law care first? That would certainly level the playing field a bit. Its not like society benefits from the whole concept of lawyers and the means by which they profit,,,,

  20. Zakrajshek


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    39   10:08am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Good one. What happened to Tony Manero?

  21. ArtimusMaxtor


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    40   10:29am Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    errc says

    Yes! Work visas for those lovely women of montreal. Now we're making some progress. I love progressives! They taste better then realwhores too

    I think we need an expose' for certain. I've always gotten along with French girls as friends mind you. They don't always let you know what they think. But they make great friends. I'm from Detroit myself. I really love the culture and French country. The progressives when they really decide go to it. Let nothing stop them. The problem the one that "Democracy" always seems to solve is dividing people against each other leaving the people who do a such with no worry. Otherwise everyone would realize that they are being ripped off and go find the tomato slicer and take action. Dosen't make sense for a people to be divided against itself. Just dosen't make sense. "Democracy" is an import of course. When the people fight how can they agree to take action?

  22. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    41   3:16pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Patrick says

    bubblesitter says

    I can't wait to get one for myself. Thanks for the great idea,AF.

    It is a brilliant slogan, but it's one that would almost certainly get me sued. I need something just as pointed, but legally more defensible.

    Pubah,

    Have you even spoken to a lawyer? I am not so certain in other lives, I've learned enough about libel and IP law to have some doubts you'd be defenseless.

    Not that you won't be sued.

    But fuck, Pube, you can't possibly pay for the kind of publicity that would come from such a suit.

    Think about it,

    AF

  23. bubblesitter


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    42   3:23pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    APOCALYPSEFUCK isFrank Sinatra says

    Pube, you can't possibly pay for the kind of publicity that would come from such a suit.

    So true. Either way it could go in Patrick's favor - the publicity patrick.net will get.

  24. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    43   3:48pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Actually, PatNet should just run this on the index page and see what happens and shop around for pro bono representation. Realtor®s are more hated than even lawyers and no doubt a law firm would get a kick out of defending a victim of opportunistic litigation against a class of 'professionals' more hated than they are.

  25. ArtimusMaxtor


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    44   4:23pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    errc says

    Its not like society benefits from the whole concept of lawyers and the means by which they profit

    It's another racket errc no doubt. The right people aren't going to jail and in many cases the wrong ones. We all have a long list of people we know damn well belong. You can say thats the way It always is. However we live in a thug state. Where do they derive their authority from "Bible"? Thats the underpinning of course. You have to "hire" a lawyer thats the disgrace in all of this and the "racket".

    Hiring a lawyer to do my personal work thats one thing. I like my lawyers ok.

    When it comes to criminal matters or someone being shut up for a long time in an iron and concrete cave. Pay for a lawyer is something else entirely. The system is fucked for that very reason.

  26. Patrick


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    45   4:26pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Having already gotten a letter from the NAR merely for having "What your realtor won't tell you" as my slogan, I'm pretty sure that they would sue.

    All I really need to do is find something equally good to "Take a bite out of crime -- eat a realtor" but without the possible libel and McGruff trademark problems. Can't be that hard.

    I worked with a guy who was selling buttons with the US postal service logo and the text "Disgruntled? Ask me." Their lawyers threatened him for using their logo, but because it was definitely parody, they couldn't do much.

  27. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    46   4:34pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    TERMINATE FINANCIAL CRIME:
    EAT A REALTY AGENT - SLOWLY!

  28. ArtimusMaxtor


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    47   7:16pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

  29. bubblesitter


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    48   8:42pm Fri 18 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    TAKE A BITE OUT OF CRIME:
    EAT AN AGENT®!

    TAKE A BITE OUT OF CRIME:
    EAT AN USED HOUSE DEALER®!

    How would NAR come after you if there is no Realtor word in the slogan?

  30. ELC


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    49   4:37am Sat 19 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    MLS Envy.

  31. ArtimusMaxtor


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    50   4:57am Sat 19 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Efficient Life Church says

    MLS Envy.

    LOL. I think though at this point I can get the MLS and get the agent to blow me with very little trouble at this point.

  32. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    51   5:04am Sat 19 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Be a Crime Biter:
    Eat a Realty Agent!

  33. bg


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    52   11:22am Sat 19 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    errc says

    Realtwhores. Its what's for dinner

    Like this one.

  34. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    53   12:22pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Pubah,

    So what is the winning phrase and when will be able to buy the T-shirts?

    AF

  35. Patrick


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    54   1:54pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Would you buy a bumper sticker with this on it?

    I could place the order for 100 of those today and sell them for $3/each with shipping included. But I'm not sure enough people will buy them.

    T-shirts are even riskier. I sold a few once but immediately some didn't fit, or the quality was not good, and I regretted even trying that. At least bumper stickers always fit and the quality is pretty uniform.

  36. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    55   2:45pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Sure but the graphic is a little dry. Can you hire a cartoonist showing a Realtor® getting bitten on the face? Or sitting in a huge cannibal stew pot?

    Patrick says

    Would you buy a bumper sticker with this on it?

    I could place the order for 100 of those today and sell them for $3/each with shipping included. But I'm not sure enough people will buy them.

    T-shirts are even riskier. I sold a few once but immediately some didn't fit, or the quality was not good, and I regretted even trying that. At least bumper stickers always fit and the quality is pretty uniform.

  37. ELC


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    56   2:49pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    There was a bumper sticker going around of the American Flag with "These Colors Don't Run" printed on it. What was funny, it must have been defective or printed with an ink jet printer because the colors did run. Maybe it was done on purpose?

  38. ELC


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    57   4:14pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Or something like this.

  39. Patrick


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    58   7:08pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    I'm not much of an artist. Anyone want to create original art showing a realtor getting bitten on the face or sitting in a cannibal stew pot?

  40. APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich


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    59   8:33pm Mon 21 May 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    If no one volunteers, I'll find an artist. The stew pot concept is of particular fascination.

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