I Am Adam Lanzas Mother


By GraooGra   Follow   Sun, 16 Dec 2012, 11:25am   1,685 views   19 comments
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Three days before 20 year-old Adam Lanza killed his mother, then opened fire on a classroom full of Connecticut kindergartners, my 13-year old son Michael (name changed) missed his bus because he was wearing the wrong color pants.

http://gawker.com/5968818/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother

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  1. elliemae


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    1   12:23pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike (1)   Protected  

    I couldn't open the link - found another here:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/16/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother-mental-illness-conversation_n_2311009.html

    Thankyou for sharing this link!

  2. Call it Crazy


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    2   12:25pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike (2)  

    elliemae says

    I couldn't open the link - found another here:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/16/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother-mental-illness-conversation_n_2311009.html

    Thankyou for sharing this link!

    I read that story on another forum.... very sad.... Really makes you wonder how many more are like this out there hiding in the "shadows"??

  3. MsBennet


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    3   12:39pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    That is tragic.

  4. Vaticanus


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    4   1:43pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike (4)  

    What a sad reality we are facing as families, communities and as a nation. I wonder if either of these mothers, taught and practiced the 10 commandments?

  5. everything


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    5   8:14pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike (1)  

    Poor woman nothing, this is not an uncommon story. As long as the world is poisoned by questionable genetics allowing anyone to breed and take any pharmaceutical drug they want in combo with things like GM foods and all the chemicals they can pour on them.

    When you hear the stories about organ harvesting in China guess what kind of people they are taking the organs from?

    They are not as dumb or cruel as people think, how about they are smart and don't need or care for the type of problems that are endemic in the U.S. We put our dogs and cats to sleep, it's painless, and the most humane thing you can do for a living and breathing organic animal who is suffering needlessly. So instead go ahead and put him into the system so we can create some government jobs to take care of his special needs because his mind was gone from day one. Let his family suffer for 18 years until you can pass him off onto the "system" In the meantime it's ok that he threatens to kill you for those 18 years because .. He saw it on TV or something!

    You want to let people like this live and run the streets, your society and culture can pay the ultimate price. Oh, and idiots rule too.

  6. CaptainShuddup


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    6   8:39pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (6)   Dislike (5)  

    Back in my day, the little punk would have prayed HE makes it through the night with an attitude like that. And there wasn't a 6 O'clock channel 4 news, that would have stopped my Old man from putting an old fashioned foot in his ass.

    This is the culmination of years of childless touchy feely Psych Drs writing books on child rearing, reinventing the roles of the parent and child.

  7. David9


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    7   8:58pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    At the very end of the article is what I believe to be the woman's main point:

    "I agree that something must be done. It's time for a meaningful, nation-wide conversation about mental health. That's the only way our nation can ever truly heal.

    God help me. God help Michael. God help us all."

    Just like the Housing Market column, blaring horns every day, huge white elephants parading around the room, and a media that says and does nothing, except for kissing the ass of the Walton WalMart family, but that is just my opinion.

    Want to clarify, I was shocked someone gunned downed 6 year olds..

  8. elliemae


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    8   10:28pm Sun 16 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike (2)   Protected  

    Vaticanus says

    I wonder if either of these mothers, taught and practiced the 10 commandments?

    Mentally ill people often have an obsession with religion, fyi. But teaching them the ten commandments or the teachings of whichever religion to which the parents subscribe doesn't help. The term Mental illness refers to a bunch of horrible diseases, and we're not treating them appropriately.

    CaptainShuddup says

    Back in my day, the little punk would have prayed HE makes it through the night with an attitude like that.

    It's not attitude - it's the way their brains are wired. The boy in the article is mentally ill, and he is functioning the best way he knows how. Unfortunately, that includes violence and contrition. If you could beat it out of him, it would be so much easier.

    Unfortunately, it's unpredictable too. You can raise a "normal" child, only to have them display symptoms of severe mental illness in their early 20's. It's devastating for families, trying to deal with them.

    And yet, these people walk among us. Some of them are functional - like Catherine Zeta Jones - while others are uncontrolled. Some live in group homes and are monitored, but most are not. Try being a landlord and having to follow the laws while a mentally ill person trashes your apartment- and you might not even be able to evict them due to antidiscrimination laws regarding the handicapped.

    Not an easy subject to think about - imagine living with it 24/7.

  9. deepcgi


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    9   12:07am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike (1)  

    Hm. I wonder about touchy-feely parenting in cases like this. He's mentally ill, but also at least a little afraid of his mother's power over his video games.

    One hundred years ago in almost any family in the world with a father, he'd likely also be VERY afraid of the painful consequences of speaking to his mother like that. Fear of and reaction to pain does occur at a subconscious and reflexive level. Even sociopaths, while feeling no guilt, feel fear of pain. I just don't know anymore, but I'm certain enough that we don't know what we are doing.

    Hiding the knives is no answer once he's 15 or so.

  10. deepcgi


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    10   12:20am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike (1)  

    Think about it. If this lady's case is in any way similar to the family's in this weeks tragedy, it most certainly would have been better if the first time he called his mother a bitch, threatened to kill her and then himself, if his "father" had simply said, "no need to kill yourself son...let me do that for you".

    Seriously. Murdering small children? I will never believe he never exhibited tendencies before the day of the tragedy.

  11. drew_eckhardt


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    11   12:47am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Vaticanus says

    What a sad reality we are facing as families, communities and as a nation. I wonder if either of these mothers, taught and practiced the 10 commandments?

    I've had the displeasure of working with a few sociopaths.

    One found a 14 year girl on the internet, flew to the nearest airport and picked her up at school in a rental car after she turned fifteen, had sex with her all three ways, and threw a towel at her so she could cleanup (we read the arrest report). About seven years passed between his arrest and release from federal prison (I read some internet article about the prison system, learned you could search for federal prisoners, and tried it).

    As a child he served as an altar boy.

    Some people have mental illnesses which pose a danger to themselves and community which aren't going to be fixed by traditional child-rearing techniques.

    Maybe early mental health treatment would help; although with the stigma associated with that, 50% coverage on health insurance, and uninsured we aren't trying hard.

    Maybe some of those people are incurrable. Although reports of serial killers comment on their childhood activities, we often ignore children's actions which would be crimes (assault and battery becomes "bullying") and aren't doing much to stop those people before they get too far.

  12. MsBennet


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    12   12:50am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    drew_eckhardt says

    served as an altar boy.

    That explains everything.

  13. drew_eckhardt


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    13   1:00am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    CaptainShuddup says

    Back in my day, the little punk would have prayed HE makes it through the night with an attitude like that. And there wasn't a 6 O'clock channel 4 news, that would have stopped my Old man from putting an old fashioned foot in his ass.

    Like Charles Whitman born in 1941?

    Whitman was a polite, well-mannered child who seldom lost his temper. He was also extremely intelligent: an examination at the age of six revealed his IQ to be 172. Whitman's academic achievements were encouraged by his parents, yet any indication of failure or a lethargic attitude would be met with discipline often physical from his father.

    Margaret Whitman was a devout Roman Catholic who raised her sons in the same faith. The Whitman brothers regularly attended Mass with their mother and all three brothers served as altar boys at the Sacred Heart Roman Catholic Church.

    That old fashioned foot in his ass and Catholic upbringing didn't prevent him from killing 13 and injuring 32.

  14. zzyzzx


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    14   7:49am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike (4)  

    This is what happens when you don't beat your kids. You need to show them who is the boss.

    http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=beat

  15. GraooGra


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    15   8:40am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    You know I was not born in USA, so I don't know everything what was going on in here...

    What happened to institutionalization of the mentally sick?

    I have heard that something was done in Reagan era.

    You often see these homeless schizophrenics wandering around and I think if there is anything what can be done to keep them confined in one safe and warm place. I understand there is a freedom of everything in the States but these people obviously are not able decide for themselves.

  16. David9


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    16   8:50am Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    GraooGra says

    What happened to institutionalization of the mentally sick?

    GraooGra says

    You often see these homeless schizophrenics wandering around

    You are completely correct. In one state, they were given a coat and a ham and cheese sandwich with mayonaise before being put out on the street by Reagan.

  17. GraooGra


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    17   1:54pm Mon 17 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    Here is another article where they say Asperger's Syndrom cannot be blamed at his violence. However meds are suspected.

    http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2012/12/17/expert-aspergers-syndrome-unfairly-scapegoated-for-newtown-school-massacre/

    [...]

    "She said she would be interested to see what medications Lanza may have been taking so medical professionals could try to determine if they played any role in triggering the rampage.

    “We really do need to look at the medications. Pharmaceuticals tend to be left out of the equation and I think they may be a very big part of it,” she added.

  18. Homeboy


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    18   6:05pm Wed 19 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike  

    zzyzzx says

    This is what happens when you don't beat your kids. You need to show them who is the boss.

    http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=beat

    The difference between you and Maddox is: Maddox is funny, but you are just an asshole.

  19. elliemae


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    19   7:20am Thu 20 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike   Protected  

    Homeboy says

    The difference between you and Maddox is: Maddox is funny, but you are just an asshole.

    That link was really awful, and I'm a pretty tolerant kinda gal.

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