Credit Scores and Dating...


By BayArea   Follow   Thu, 27 Dec 2012, 10:11am   2,539 views   42 comments
In Oakland CA 94618   Watch (1)   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

Now I understand why more of us will not walk away from our underwater mortgages ;-)

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/perfect-10-never-mind-ask-015017521.html

Her musings were suddenly interrupted when her date asked a decidedly unromantic question: “What’s your credit score?”

“It was as if the music stopped,” Ms. LaShawn, 31, said, recalling how the date this year went so wrong so quickly after she tried to answer his question honestly. “It was really awkward because he kept telling me that I was the perfect girl for him, but that a low credit score was his deal-breaker.”

The credit score, once a little-known metric derived from a complex formula that incorporates outstanding debt and payment histories, has become an increasingly important number used to bestow credit, determine housing and even distinguish between job candidates.

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  1. APOCALYPSEFUCKisShostikovitch


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    1   3:33am Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (5)   Dislike  

    The Professor says

    However, if you want to scare someone away ...

    Right, and you can be far more creative. For example, you could let slip that you really enjoy sex on the altars of burning churches. Most would leap from the nearest window upon hearing the news. The one that stayed, though, she's the keeper.

  2. CaptainShuddup


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    2   10:19am Thu 27 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (3)   Dislike (1)  

    Credit scores are meaningless.

    Signed a guy who walked away from all debt in 2002, and bought a house in 2010 and now has a 795 credit score.
    Your credit score is nothing that 7 years wont fix. No matter how bad it is.
    And truth be told, that 7 years can be God sent. You save money, learn to appreciate paying cash, learn that credit is only important for the banks that wants to own your soul. 7 years of watching bills shrink and savings grow. Not a bad deal at all if you ask me. And before any of you judge me.
    I was well with my legal right to wait 7 years for all of the bullshit to cycle off my credit. Just as they were in their right to sell my debt to Sherman Acquisitions who hires rude obnoxious people to hound you relentlessly and want 500x what you originally owed.
    The game IS rigged, but you don't have to play. That always amazes me, how people don't realize that. They watch these bastards rob the treasuries blind, but snap to when they are sent the bill.

  3. New Renter


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    3   9:25pm Thu 27 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike  

    woppa says

    Eh that isn't always true either. 150k in student loans certainly does not equate to a high paying job or any job at all even.

    Nope! Most people I know at high paying jobs have at most a bachelors.

  4. errc


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    4   9:47pm Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike  

    Credit score smedit scores. Finances are down the list of shit that matters to me when mating. But if you're going to get to the meat and potatos of it, I'm much more concerned with incomes relative to desired lifestyle. My old lady likes having the big house and the walk in closet full of clothes and heels and what not. Me, I'm. A simple simon utilitarian motherfucker. So I take no issue in her making twice as much income as me

  5. APOCALYPSEFUCKisShostikovitch


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    5   10:57pm Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike  

    elliemae says

    I'd be in fucking heaven!!!

    Does *that* happen in Heaven? Have you talked with St Peter about this?

  6. zzyzzx


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    6   8:26pm Thu 27 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (3)   Dislike (2)  

    Lauren Dollard, a 26-year-old assistant at a nonprofit in Houston, said her low credit score had helped to stall her romantic plans. Her boyfriend is wary of marrying her until she can significantly pay down the more than $150,000 she owes in student loans and bolster her credit score, she said.

    I wouldn't marry someone with 150K in student debt.

  7. New Renter


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    7   9:18pm Thu 27 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    BayArea says

    Her musings were suddenly interrupted when her date asked a decidedly unromantic question: “What’s your credit score?”

    Yep, right up there with "what were the results of your last AIDS test" or "Did you murder your last boyfriend?"

    The guy was looking for an out. He found it.

  8. New Renter


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    8   9:23pm Thu 27 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    BayArea says

    zzyzzx says

    Lauren Dollard, a 26-year-old assistant at a nonprofit in Houston, said her low credit score had helped to stall her romantic plans. Her boyfriend is wary of marrying her until she can significantly pay down the more than $150,000 she owes in student loans and bolster her credit score, she said.

    I wouldn't marry someone with 150K in student debt.

    What a terrible outlook! I will take a $150k in school loans and someone who invested in themselves and their education over someone who didn't with no school loans. The long run looks brighter with the first option IMHO

    How about if the degree was from a non-accredited institution, not accepted by any employer and even under 100% best case conditions that person would never come close to paying off that debt without a hefty infusion of YOUR cash?

    Even better the person's only ambition in life was to sit on the couch watching Gilligan's Island marathons and eating ice cream by the bucket?

  9. mell


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    9   9:32pm Thu 27 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    woppa says

    That's a really shitty way of going about finding your partner in life.

    Definitely not since you are on the hook for the money after marrying them. But what is really shitty advice is telling somebody $150K in debt doesn't matter and I guess they'd 'just come up with it'.

  10. The Professor


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    10   9:56am Fri 28 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike   Protected  

    A couple of rules for online dating:

    You can learn a lot from what someone writes. Typos and bad grammar indicate lack of education. Use email correspondence to vet and reject unqualified candidates.

    Don't depend on pics being accurate. I had a 4 month online relationship with this (from pic) attractive lady. She looked a bit young but not TOO young. Right before we met she admitted that the pic was 15 years old from college, she had gained some weight (50#s) and she was just getting out of a 10 year lesbian relationship. We met anyway but there was no chemistry.

    Be honest. but don't reveal too much. No sense in scaring them away too quickly. Eventually everything important should be revealed.

    Don't misuse time or money with anyone who you know is not right.

    Most important rule: If the person seems like a good fit, set up a meeting in a public place asap.

  11. lostand confused


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    11   10:17am Fri 28 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    BayArea says

    What a terrible outlook! I will take a $150k in school loans and someone who
    invested in themselves and their education over someone who didn't with no
    school loans. The long run looks brighter with the first option IMHO

    It depends. She could quit working right after marraige and beome a shopoholic . Now you have to feed her shopping habit and pay off her school debt too-it happened to one of my friends. The lady refused to go to work -even though she worked before and just spend her time enjoying life on his dime. Unfortunately that is perfectly acceptable for a woman. If you are married long enough-you have to keep her in the lifestyle she is used to.

  12. BayArea


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    12   11:01am Fri 28 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    turtledove says

    Women get bait and switched, too.

    100% true.... I don't think this was his plan but there are some fraction of men out there who only work because they have to. So... What happened in the end?

    Since we are moving away from traditional roles (which has it's positives and negatives), he didn't feel the sense of urgency to get off his ass and be the bread winner since you were obviously bringing in enough dough to keep the ship sailing. Without knowing what his struggles were/are, I will say that most guys' pride would not allow their woman to be working more than they do... I certainly wouldn't.

    I have been in a situation where I was forced to take a job for a short period of time that I was over-qualified for. But that's something I felt I had to do.

  13. jvolstad


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    13   3:08pm Fri 28 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    I've noticed a number of young single Mothers in the San Antonio, Texas area, trying to hook up with the GI's in town. (Lackland AFB, Randolph AFB, Fort Sam Houston). I'm sure the reason being the are benefits married troops receive.

  14. zzyzzx


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    14   3:53pm Fri 28 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    BayArea says

    I will take a $150k in school loans and someone who invested in themselves and their education over someone who didn't with no school loans.

    Some of us actually worked our way through college TWICE without incurring any debt. Someone who ended up in that much debt just wasted a bunch of money and is too fiscally irresponsible to date.

  15. Peter P


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    15   10:22pm Fri 28 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike   Protected  

    I would not date anyone who could not laugh at my jokes.

    Finance is somewhat important though. It has more to say about one's philosophy and value system. It is fine to be in debt, but having a huge student loan on a Women's Studies degree would be a big red flag.

    I would not date a vegetarian.

  16. The Professor


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    16   10:51am Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike   Protected  

    APOCALYPSEFUCK is Shostakovich says

    Right, and you can be far more creative. For example, you could let slip that you really enjoy sex on the altars of burning churches. Most would leap from the nearest window upon hearing the news. The one that stayed, though, she's the keeper.

    LOL. This is the only way I can double "Like" this post.

    Everyone send Patrick money and like Apocalypse's Posts. It will encourage them.

  17. elliemae


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    17   8:54pm Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike   Protected  

    New Renter says

    Even better the person's only ambition in life was to sit on the couch watching Gilligan's Island marathons and eating ice cream by the bucket?

    If only I could be paid for this... and if you could substitute "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" for Gilligan's Island... I'd be in fucking heaven!!!

    turtledove says

    Yeah... he was quite a prize! Women get bait and switched, too.

    Tell me about it... I married a professional and together we bought a house - his mother gifted us $5,000 for the down payment and I came up with the rest out of my savings of $6,000. About six years later, we were driving and he told me not to get mad (always a bad sign). He said that he was quitting his job the next day.

    We discussed that he had two children for which he was paying support, as well as the bills we had for our house. I also reminded him that we had very little savings. My suggestion was that he should save up, pay off some bills, and plan for such a move. So, for the next year, we sacrificed and saved up quite a chunk while paying off bills.

    A year later, he quit his job with no notice, cashed out our savings account and left me. I had no idea where he was. I brought in about 30% of the income to the household; it was difficult to make ends meet but I did by taking a second job and watching every penny, as well as boarding other people's horses. I remained in the house, paying all of the bills.

    Another year later, he returned (broke) from out of town and filed for divorce. He asked for the house and all of our common possessions. He felt that he deserved everything, and yelled at the judge when he ended up owing me money in addition to my getting the house.

    This wasn't the man that I thought that I married - he truly "changed" the day we got married. If I ever marry again, I will be more cautious and will protect myself financially to (hopefully) ensure that I never again have to choose between eating or paying a bill.

  18. mell


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    18   9:39pm Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    MsBennet says

    Glad to hear a female perspective on this. You guys make it sound like the women are always the irresponsible ones.

    I think this stems from the fact that it is mostly the woman's initiative (pressure) to get married, and unfortunately also (I think close to 2/3) to get divorced. Of course there are bad apples on both sides as always, but if you can lay off the need to be married the possibilities are endless.

  19. justme


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    19   10:35pm Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike  

    errc says

    I'm much more concerned with incomes relative to desired lifestyle.

    I think that the ratio of income/expenditures is directly implied when people think about asking their date for the credit score. The credit score is pretty much a gauge of people's ability to live within their means.

  20. Peter P


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    20   10:40pm Sat 29 Dec 2012   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike   Protected  

    justme says

    The credit score is pretty much a gauge of people's ability to live within their means.

    Not if the person in question gets help from his/her parents.

    I think a 30-minute chat would reveal a lot.

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