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Stay out of Florida


By Dan8267   Follow   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 9:14am PDT   1,255 views   42 comments
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http://abcnews.go.com/WNT/video/missing-ohio-family-rescued-dangerous-everglades-18892769

Just remember, if you come to Florida, you could be eaten by alligators or stuck in the swamp forever. Stay up in Ohio, New York, or wherever else you came from. If you have to vacation someplace warm, do so in Mexico. And stop buying houses that you'll only want to occupy for three months of the year. Alligators are attracted to such houses.

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Dan8267   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 11:46am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike     Comment 3

Florida

Mexico

You decide.

CaptainShuddup   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 12:06pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (4)   Dislike     Comment 4

Don't listen to Dan, our economy needs the mugging victims.

Dan8267   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 12:19pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 5

Have I mentioned that Florida is the lightning capital of the world? Zeus will pop a cap in your ass if you come here.

curious2   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 12:58pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 6

New Renter says

You are recommending Mexico as a safer alternative to Florida?

It was, until ATF gunwalking and the DEA "war on drugs" killed more than 50,000 people there. I have had only good experience with Mexico, even with what's been happening lately, but the American federal government decision to export our "drug war" to Mexico has brought tragic violence and tears to a fine country.

Ceffer   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 4:34pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 7

I hear that once you get past the electrified barbed wire on the main drags and the huge bug zapping machines and malathion, Florida is exactly like Skull Island from the King Kong movies.

New Renter   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 7:00pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 8

Ceffer says

I hear that once you get past the electrified barbed wire on the main drags and the huge bug zapping machines and malathion, Florida is exactly like Skull Island from the King Kong movies.

I think we found the lost land of AF!

thomaswong.1986   Thu, 18 Apr 2013, 7:13pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 9

curious2 says

It was, until ATF gunwalking and the DEA "war on drugs" killed more than 50,000 people there. I have had only good experience with Mexico, even with what's been happening lately, but the American federal government decision to export our "drug war" to Mexico has brought tragic violence and tears to a fine country.

You mean how the various members of the drug cartel are killing each other over market share ? Which family will be number 1 controlling the drug trade. Just like the Columbians and Bolivians were shooting it out decades ago. And you point and blame the killings on the USA govt.. oh thats hot !

The drugs really have gone to your head... muchacho ! If you really feel anything over the 50,000 dead, might be a good idea to stop using drugs.

finehoe   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 4:13am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 10

IDDQD says

Was China such a wonderful place when everybody and his dog could smoke all the opium they wanted?

Ask the British.

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 4:23am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 11

IDDQD says

finehoe says

IDDQD says

Was China such a wonderful place when everybody and his dog could smoke all the opium they wanted?

Ask the British.

I'm more interested on Chinese point of view on this matter.

Depends on if the person asked chinese or brit was getting a piece of the action.

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 4:31am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 12

IDDQD says

curious2 says

It was, until ATF gunwalking and the DEA "war on drugs" killed more than 50,000 people there. I have had only good experience with Mexico, even with what's been happening lately, but the American federal government decision to export our "drug war" to Mexico has brought tragic violence and tears to a fine country.

I keep hearing how the drug war is bad and how wonderful USA would would be if there were no restrictions on drugs sale and use. Was China such a wonderful place when everybody and his dog could smoke all the opium they wanted?

Which is worse- unlimited opium smokimg or a job at Foxconn?

finehoe   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 5:11am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike     Comment 13

IDDQD says

I'm more interested on Chinese point of view on this matter.

Chinese officials wished to end the spread of opium, and confiscated supplies of opium from British traders. The British government objected to this seizure and used its military power to violently enforce redress.

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 5:28am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 14

IDDQD says

New Renter says

Which is worse- unlimited opium smokimg or a job at Foxconn?

You can quit Foxconn.

And end up on the streets with no money, no friends, nothing. If quitting was a viable option don't you think people would have done that rather than commit scuicide?

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 5:30am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 15

IDDQD says

finehoe says

Chinese officials wished to end the spread of opium, and confiscated supplies of opium from British traders. The British government objected to this seizure and used its military power to violently enforce redress.

These are well-known facts but don't really answer the question whether it was such a happy place before their evil gubmint decided to start their version of "war on drugs". Were people happy and healthy, was the economy booming and arts and science flourishing with all this wonderful opium easily accessible?

Was it ever?

thunderlips11   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 5:56am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 16

IDDQD says

Were people happy and healthy, was the economy booming and arts and science flourishing with all this wonderful opium easily accessible?

Massive explosion of arts and sciences in the 19th Century. Laudanum was a massive epidemic effecting countless people in the US and UK, which were countries rapidly industrializing and achieving new heights of artistic and scientific endeavors.

Everybody from Grandma to Clive to Coleridge to Poe to even Ben Franklin, used laudanum frequently.

JodyChunder   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 7:58am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 17

New Renter says

You are recommending Mexico as a safer alternative to Florida?

He is definitely not exaggerating.

Dan8267   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 8:10am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 18

...my motivations in keeping people out of Florida might be a bit selfish. Too many people here already. Housing prices too high.

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 10:59am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 19

Dan8267 says

...my motivations in keeping people out of Florida might be a bit selfish. Too many people here already. Housing prices too high.

Buy a houseboat. At least that will float as the rest of the state sinks beneath the ocean.

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 11:01am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 20

JodyChunder says

New Renter says

You are recommending Mexico as a safer alternative to Florida?

He is definitely not exaggerating.

¬°Aye Caramba!

David Losh   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 11:28am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 21

Dan8267 says

Housing prices too high.

My wife said she saw a condo for $60K in Miami, yes, no, maybe?

New Renter   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 1:51pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 22

David Losh says

Dan8267 says

Housing prices too high.

My wife said she saw a condo for $60K in Miami, yes, no, maybe?

Grossly overpriced!

JodyChunder   Fri, 19 Apr 2013, 5:21pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 23

Dan8267 says

...my motivations in keeping people out of Florida might be a bit selfish. Too many people here already. Housing prices too high.

I nearly got stabbed one night passing through Orlando Florida many years back while trying to buy a slice of pizza. I was in town exactly two hours.

Dan8267   Mon, 22 Apr 2013, 2:04pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 24

JodyChunder says

I nearly got stabbed one night passing through Orlando Florida many years back while trying to buy a slice of pizza. I was in town exactly two hours.

That is a new record. Last guy only made it to 1:47.

JodyChunder   Mon, 22 Apr 2013, 5:19pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 25

It was a serious deal. He was wearing a T-shirt with a giant Darth Maul face on it and looked like a less well-fed version of Ernest Borgnine.

It's too bad about Florida, man. That place frightens me anymore. And I don't scare all that easily, Dan.

errc   Mon, 22 Apr 2013, 10:42pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 26

If the rainbow people have multiplied so that they're spreading out from the forrest, into major population centers like Oklawaha, try somewhere nicer and more happening, like Ocala. Or Dunellon, its nice there on the river this time of year

errc   Mon, 22 Apr 2013, 10:46pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (2)   Dislike     Comment 27

Whenever I hear people argue FOR the government restricting drug use, as it pertains to the "bad" "drugs" (opiates, pot, coke), I can't help but assume that their thougts are not their own. I just can't fathom that ones organic thoughts would lead them to speak in favor of a gun wielding police state imprisoning the populace for using NATURAL drugs, yet nary a peep about the tens of millions of people hooked on dangerous, addictive, ineffective drugs like (insert any of the top 15 prescribed fda approved bigphrma drugs)

CaptainShuddup   Mon, 22 Apr 2013, 11:36pm PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 28

errc says

yet nary a peep about the tens of millions of people hooked on dangerous, addictive, ineffective drugs like (insert any of the top 15 prescribed fda approved bigphrma drugs)

Especially when you consider that Pig Pharm drugs, are drugs you have to take for life, of face serious health consequences when you try to ween your self off.

APOCALYPSEFUCKisShostikovitch   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 12:57am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 29

EAT FACE!

APOCALYPSEFUCKisShostikovitch   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 1:04am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike     Comment 30

FLORIDA FACES ARE FACES FINE FOR BITING!

Dan8267   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 4:08am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike     Comment 31

JodyChunder says

It's too bad about Florida, man. That place frightens me anymore. And I don't scare all that easily, Dan.

I think it's the incredible contrast between poverty on one side of the street and rich, gated communities on the other. All the have-nots see what they have not, and with the weather being good, they are all out on the street. At least up north crime takes a break during the cold winter.

edvard2   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 5:20am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 32

Florida to me is a hole. Its basically where all of the retirees from NY, MA, NJ, and the other Northeastern states go to retire. Its also the state where seemingly every cop/chase TV show is filmed. Its also got some really crappy weather. Granted its warm in the winter, but then 99 degrees and 99% humidity for half the year. We lived in NC and every time we went to the beach I could hardly wait to go back home.

Vicente   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 6:27am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike     Comment 33

Florida went downhill after this went off the air:

upisdown   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 6:30am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 34

edvard2 says

Florida to me is a hole. Its basically where all of the retirees from NY, MA,
NJ, and the other Northeastern states go to retire. Its also the state where
seemingly every cop/chase TV show is filmed. Its also got some really crappy
weather. Granted its warm in the winter, but then 99 degrees and 99% humidity
for half the year. We lived in NC and every time we went to the beach I could
hardly wait to go back home.

LOL, we always said that it was the destination for all the pretentious assholes that unforunately, move back sooner or later.

CaptainShuddup   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 6:31am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 35

edvard2 says

Its basically where all of the retirees from NY, MA, NJ, and the other Northeastern states go to retire.

I wish we still had those people, they were good people.

Miami Vice was the beginning of the end.
It's when the tide turned from nice folks as mentioned above, quit coming, and scumbags, that believed what they saw on Miami vice was true, and the fruit was ripe for the Crooks to come pick.

Fuck I even miss the French Canadians at this point.

edvard2   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 8:02am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 36

To me, going into the "northerners moving to Florida" comment deeper, to me the reason I personally don't see this as exactly fantastic is because why do most of those people move there? Its because they spent 40-50 years in a cold-as-hell city on the Northeast and at that point all they're thinking about is getting out of there and moving someplace warm, and probably someplace close enough to see the kids and grandkids who stay up north. So Florida it is. Hence a bunch of people who moved there for no other reason than for the weather whom will identify as being New Yorkers or Bostonians for the rest of their lives, whom don't know anything or care to know anything about whatever regional characteristics or customs might have been in that area, and whom also aren't contributing as much to the economy in terms of being productive- because they are retired.

I'm not saying people shouldn't move from say- NY to FL. I lived in the NE for 2 years and god was the weather awful. I don't blame people for making that choice. But when that many people move for such topical reasons, the culture that tends to lead to is bland and uninteresting.

JodyChunder   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 8:38am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 37

Dan8267 says

I think it's the incredible contrast between poverty on one side of the street and rich, gated communities on the other. All the have-nots see what they have not, and with the weather being good, they are all out on the street. At least up north crime takes a break during the cold winter.

I think you've got something there. The ol' High/Low theme. Too bad the evildoers can't figure out that robbing one another or people not that much better off than themselves is...stupid.

dublin hillz   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 8:43am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 38

JodyChunder says

Dan8267 says



I think it's the incredible contrast between poverty on one side of the street and rich, gated communities on the other. All the have-nots see what they have not, and with the weather being good, they are all out on the street. At least up north crime takes a break during the cold winter.


I think you've got something there. The ol' High/Low theme. Too bad the evildoers can't figure out that robbing one another or people not that much better off than themselves is...stupid.

I agree, however, many people in united states tend to have envy of those who are slightly better off instead of focusing attention at those who are multiple degrees better off

JodyChunder   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 8:48am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 39

edvard2 says

Florida to me is a hole. Its basically where all of the retirees from NY, MA, NJ, and the other Northeastern states go to retire.

Well, the affordability in that part of the country was once very very down to earth. I don't know about anymore. There are beautiful parts of the coastline there and some really lovely flora and fauna, if you're into that kinda thing (I yam). The summertime weather, well...you gotta know how to rock the seersucker and linen. Think Faulkner or Williams...

My problem with Florida, and especially Central FL, is that the people who vacation there seem to have this infantile notion that it's Disney World 24/7 and so they move there for perpetual fun-in-the-sun. When it doesn't pan out that way, you wind up with a lot of disgruntled motherfuckers walking around looking for someone's day to ruin.

Plus, I think when your engine for attracting people to your city is volleyball in February and year-round boredom relief, you just have to know you're going to be attracting a certain base element.

New Renter   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 9:20am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like (1)   Dislike     Comment 40

robertoaribas says

edvard2 says

to me the reason I personally don't see this as exactly fantastic is because why do most of those people move there?

They moved there for the same reasons the ones from the midwest come to scottsdale AZ in the winter:

1. to drive slow as hell in front of you, when you are in a hurry.

2. (florida version of snowbird) to talk in an obnoxious voice about how, "thatz naught how weee do it in new yaork"

3. to golf

4. to sit at the coffee shops forever, so you can't get a seat when you go.

thats about it!

And to be stung by scorpions. Painful as hell but cheaper than botox

upisdown   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 10:10am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 41

robertoaribas says

1. to drive slow as hell in front of you, when you are in a hurry.
2.
(florida version of snowbird) to talk in an obnoxious voice about how, "thatz
naught how weee do it in new yaork"
3. to golf
4. to sit at the coffee
shops forever, so you can't get a seat when you go.

You lucky folks, and they usually have to dump RE when they leave too. That's a plus for having to put up with their spoiled baby boomer asses!

At least when they move back, their incessant medical spending brings federal money back to our area to offest the overall loss we suffer by supporting the south and red states.

JodyChunder   Tue, 23 Apr 2013, 11:17am PDT   Share   Quote   Permalink   Like   Dislike     Comment 42

Yep...

Long long walks
On the beach
Lovely times...

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