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Keep Christmas In December!


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2016 Nov 5, 6:37pm   6,678 views  27 comments

by Patrick   ➕follow (55)   💰tip   ignore  

I got my first bit of Xmas schwag yesterday, November 4th: Peets served me espresso in a Christmas-themed paper cup.

It really pissed me off.

It used to be considered unseemly to push the fake sincerity of Christmas commerce before Thanksgiving. It's been getting much worse in recent years.

Which words have the power to put fear into the black hearts of mendacious merchants who violate this rule?

"Boycott Merchants Who Put Christmas Before Thanksgiving"? Too long. Needs to be short and sharp.

Comments 1 - 27 of 27        Search these comments

2   Dan8267   2016 Nov 5, 7:06pm  

You could always make them regret bringing up Christmas by asking if they have been saved and then going on an incoherent rant about our lord and savior. If enough people pretend to be religious wackos, they might think the sales pitch isn't worth it.

3   Tenpoundbass   2016 Nov 5, 9:19pm  

hehehe espresso in a paper cup...

Here in South Florida we get "Cuban Coffee" it's espresso but has sugar and a few drops of the espresso infused by whipping it together until it's a nice caramel colored marsh mallow.
Then you pour the coffee in with the whipped fluffed coffee infused sugar, and the brown sugar slick on the top is nothing short of Coffee/Toffee goodness. They usually serve it in a 3 oz Styrofoam cup filled all the way up to the very top. Then what do they do? Put a lid on it, and all of the wonderful espumita, sticks to the top of the lid. And the robustness essence of the espresso leaches into the Styrofoam. Makes me miss the old Lilly Coffee cups with the foldout wing handles that left a waxy oil slick on your coffee. Often I'll stir in a teaspoon of Coconut oil into my coffee, it reminds me drinking paper cup coffee.

4   Peter P   2016 Nov 5, 9:30pm  

I'm sure it was a trigger-free HOLIDAY cup, as in Happy Holidays.

5   Patrick   2016 Nov 5, 9:30pm  

Tenpoundbass says

hehehe espresso in a paper cup...

The tax laws here are such that if you get it to go, there is no 10% sales tax.

And then I can take it outside and watch the people walking by.

3rd benefit: the paper cup is bigger than the micro porcelain cup. I like to add whole milk or cream, and you just can't add any if the cup is already full to the top.

6   Patrick   2016 Nov 5, 9:32pm  

Peter P says

I'm sure it was a trigger-free HOLIDAY cup, as in Happy Holidays.

True, but we all know that "holiday" means CHRISTMAS. You're just not allowed to say it anymore.

The merchants don't give a crap about Diwali or Hanukkah because their sales from those events are essentially nil.

7   Dan8267   2016 Nov 5, 9:47pm  

The one time I said merry Christmas to a coworker instead of the usual happy holidays, he turned out to be Jewish. It's just easier to say happy holidays. I don't have the time or the interest to find out and remember everybody's pet religion.

8   NDrLoR   2016 Nov 5, 9:50pm  

Thanksgiving hardly exists anymore except as a day for huge sales where people camp out overnight--I'm sure this year they remember the wonderful baragain they bought five years ago instead of spending the day with their families. At least this year Wal-Mart is going to close for Thanksgiving.

9   Ceffer   2016 Nov 5, 10:08pm  

I just say "Happy Evolution, retarded, superstitious, guilt tripping freak of nature".

10   Peter P   2016 Nov 5, 10:19pm  

Dan8267 says

The one time I said merry Christmas to a coworker instead of the usual happy holidays, he turned out to be Jewish. It's just easier to say happy holidays. I don't have the time or the interest to find out and remember everybody's pet religion.

I doubt you co-worker would be offended.

Only SJWs get triggered. It is just fashionable to have fake outrages.

11   Dan8267   2016 Nov 5, 11:37pm  

No, but it was still awkward.

12   Peter P   2016 Nov 5, 11:51pm  

Well, I am an agnostic who celebrates Passover but not Easter, and Christmas but not Hanukkah.

13   Booger   2016 Nov 6, 4:21am  

Patrick says

"Boycott Merchants Who Put Christmas Before Thanksgiving

So you are going to end up boycotting all merchants then.

14   Booger   2016 Nov 6, 4:24am  

P N Dr Lo R says

-I'm sure this year they remember the wonderful baragain they bought five years ago

You are incorrectly assuming that Black Friday sales are better than regular sales. That hasn't been the case in years.

15   Shaman   2016 Nov 6, 6:05am  

What I find ironic are all the first gen asians (mostly Buddhist) who celebrate Christmas because it's fun and they also like to give presents to their kids.
I mean it's fine, I'm certainly not offended, but it strikes me as amusing all the same.
Then again from my personal experience with people IN MY FAMILY Buddhists are very accommodating to other faiths, and sort of incorporate the extra belief into their panapoly.

16   Y   2016 Nov 6, 6:17am  

If your calendar year starts in December, it's all good...

rando says

"Boycott Merchants Who Put Christmas Before Thanksgiving"?

17   MAGA   2016 Nov 6, 4:18pm  

I miss Peets. I wish we had them here in Texas.

Merry Xmas!

18   Patrick   2016 Nov 6, 4:21pm  

jvolstad says

I miss Peets. I wish we had them here in Texas.

Merry Xmas!

I love Peets, but find that something about their coffee keeps me in an angry mood if I drink it consistently. I don't think it's just purely the caffeine, because multiple cups from other places don't have the same effect.

But they do have the best espresso of any chain, imho.

19   MAGA   2016 Nov 6, 4:34pm  

I'm going to have to try this local coffee shop here in San Antonio.

http://www.localcoffeesa.com/

Neal's Coffee Shop was another Bay Area favorite of mine. Good breakfast and coffee.

http://www.nealscoffeeshop.com/home.html

20   MAGA   2016 Nov 6, 4:38pm  

Maybe this will make Patrick feel better about Christmas.

www.youtube.com/embed/xBAshnF0HwY

21   Dan8267   2016 Nov 6, 4:40pm  

rando says

I love Peets, but find that something about their coffee keeps me in an angry mood if I drink it consistently. I don't think it's just purely the caffeine, because multiple cups from other places don't have the same effect.

It could be the PCP.

22   whitefaceddogey   2016 Nov 6, 7:02pm  

DieBankOfAmericaPhukkingDie says

Buddy lives in Menlo Park and place closest to him want 18 bucks for eggs and toast. What the fuck? If they're going to run an obscene breakfast place, I hope they have the decency to tell all the customers to SUCK! MY! DICK! with every meal and slap them randomly while commenting critically on the shitboxes they drove in and the size of their wives' breasts.

Trump has a chain of greasy spoons now?

23   HEY YOU   2016 Nov 6, 7:10pm  

Why do people hate the seasonal entrepreneurial spirit?

24   Patrick   2016 Nov 6, 7:17pm  

DieBankOfAmericaPhukkingDie says

Buddy lives in Menlo Park and place closest to him want 18 bucks for eggs and toast. What the fuck?

I live in Menlo Park you know. Yes, totally believable that some place wants $18 for eggs and toast.

Problem is the density of rich people around here. In neighboring Atherton, it's infinite. But Atherton has no restaurants, so their residents come eat over here.

25   Patrick   2016 Nov 6, 7:24pm  

If you want a little fun sometime, check out Google maps 3D view of Atherton. You can spy on the people who really own everything. Check this out. The right half, south and east of Valparaiso Ave is the relatively poor area (Menlo Park) where houses are only $2M to $5M. You can't buy anything for that little money above Valparaiso.

26   BayArea   2016 Nov 6, 9:14pm  

the people who camp out for black Friday and run into stores like maniacs have severe mental disorders

27   Peter P   2016 Nov 6, 9:24pm  

rando says

I live in Menlo Park you know. Yes, totally believable that some place wants $18 for eggs and toast.

For $24 Mademoiselle Colette will even give you foie gras! It is a neat little place.

http://www.mademoisellecolette.com/

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