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Confusing Ayn Rand and Jesus

By anonymous following x   2017 Sep 13, 4:36pm 360 views   3 comments   watch   sfw   quote     share    

I keep confusing Ayn Rand and Jesus. It’s not cool, I know, but cut me some slack. “Judge not,” as I think Ayn Rand once said.

Being a Republican is tough. Every day, you’ve got to dress up like you work at a Brooks Brothers, check in with the rich guy who tells you what indefensible position you need to defend, then decide what excuse to use to defend it. Jesus did basically the same thing, I think, which is how Christianity got so big. His donors saw how hard he was working for them and were like, “Let’s get this dude an ad buy.”

There are like four things you can say to defend any position on anything. Two of these things are “Jesus” and “Ayn Rand.” “Liberty” is another. “Liberty” is a code word that means less taxes and more guns. Another thing to say is “the United States Constitution.” That really shuts people up. And it doesn’t matter if you don’t understand the Constitution, because no one does.

Was it Ayn Rand or Jesus who was against big government BS, like public schools and minimum wages and child labor laws? Jesus, I think, although I’m not totally sure. I do know that both Jesus and Rand wrote long, boring books that I haven’t read but say I love, and that the moral of both these books is that it’s OK to tell poor people to fuck off.

But who knows? Maybe I’m the only one who’s confused. And maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on Trump. If I remember correctly, like Trump, Jesus was always doing wild, psychopathic shit. That’s why people loved him and how America got invented.

Full Article: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-keep-confusing-ayn-rand-and-jesus
#AynRand #Jesus #GOP #Satire

1   anonymous   ignore (null)   2017 Sep 13, 4:43pm   ↑ like (0)   ↓ dislike (0)   quote        

You are a lost soul anonymous. Trying to prove to yourself that your your rejection of timeless principles of human race, that you replaced with your childish rebellion against religion are somehow ok.

You still have a chance, if you accept god in your heart. Only at that point you will understand the rest of us. Until than, you are nothing but a fool.
2   Ceffer   ignore (1)   2017 Sep 13, 5:07pm   ↑ like (1)   ↓ dislike (0)   quote        

Easy, Ayn Rand Jesus would have sold them the loaves and fishes at a tidy profit.
3   TwoScoopsOfWompWomp   ignore (2)   2017 Sep 13, 5:15pm   ↑ like (1)   ↓ dislike (0)   quote        

anonymous says
like you work at a Brooks Brothers

And yet, they're all dumb, slovenly rednecks in MAGA Hats.

I'm more interested in how Silicon Valley Disruptors went from Liberty-loving Entrepreneurs to Speech-Quashing Social Justice Oligarchs.

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