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Stop freaking CHANGING! Nanny features built into technology RANT


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2020 Oct 21, 12:45pm   954 views  6 comments

by Automan Empire   ➕follow (1)   💰tip   ignore  

I hate when technology has nanny features added that second guess your intentions and get it the f### WRONG over and over, forever. Machines that do things unbidden and software that varies from your input.

A big one lately is later model cars where you put it in reverse and both exterior mirrors move down to the lowest possible position so you can't see the pavement beyond the rear tire. I have a long narrow driveway to back down, and I'm watching this thing wear out the mirror motors by operating them 50,000 times more often than a regular 2-driver family car would ever need. Thought it was just Volvos, but a customer's 15 year old Lexus does that s### too! QUIT FREAKING CHANGING!

Doors that lock themselves. I'm moving the car 15 feet. Now I pull the door handle and it doesn't respond the first time. Now I'm like, "OPEN! the F@@@ING!! DOOOOOORRRRRRRRR!!!!!!! as I pull it the second time. Once an old man customer went on and on praising how that feature saved his wife's life one time, in response to my annoyance. Cool story, but this is the same wife that ran the car over a raised center divider in clear daylight driving conditions with toddler grandchild in the back, why must I be locked in every time I turn a key so people like her are relieved of the responsibility of a light finger press on a button when they WANT the door locked?

Manual shift feature on an automatic. It won't let me hold low gear for engine braking, shifts to 2 during a heavily laden hill climb repeatedly, and other annoying habits. QUIT FREAKING CHANGING!

Scrolling down a webpage to continue reading a 10-screen-tall article. When I scroll past about the third page, the computer decides I must want to be at the bottom of the page and fast-scrolls there. Same when I try to scroll back up, shoots me to the top after a few scrolls. QUIT FREAKING CHANGING!

Google Earth. I'm trying to zoom in on a specific spot from a carefully chosen viewing angle. The program wants to show off its 3-D rendering so it changes the tilt of the viewing angle and sometimes even the compass direction. Then it keeps switching to ground view, I force it back, it switches to ground view, I curse and exit ground view, it switches back, I scream QUIT FREAKING CHANGING! at the computer but it keeps doing it.

Enough with the nanny features in technology!

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1   Eric Holder   2020 Oct 21, 12:59pm  

The most annoying one must be that stupid "forward collision warning" they have in many new cars. I once was riding Lyft in a newish Mercedes (iirc) and I almost went insane from that thing constantly lighting up huge red "BRAKE!" alert in the middle of the instrument panel every time we came close than 5-6 feet to a car in front of us. Which in city traffic was almost every couple of seconds. I won't be able to live with this shit if it was in my car.

PS. The auto door locking thing is user-configurable in Toytas. I actually changed it from auto unlocking when put in Park to manual unlock.
2   Tenpoundbass   2020 Oct 21, 1:35pm  

If I were a company that spent millions to Microsoft to earn the "Designed for Windows" decal in the Windows iterations to Windows XP(maybe 7).
I would sue the fuck out of Microsoft.

Windows had the perfect design for production and work flow. You couldn't put "Designed for Windows" on your software box, unless your menus and contextual menus were in a proper format. This design is what made Windows applications simple to use, right out of the box you were an expert if you understood the Windows menu and subsystem design.

I remember using Corel Draw right out of the box and being a pro at it. Corel Paint as well. When I installed Adobe Paintshop Pro, it was like you had to read the documentation to find or do anything. .

Windows is a mess now, and software in general has become more and more restricted, it serves incomplete data a few bytes at a time. Like we're all on 14.4 baud dial up from the old days. If you want more information than that, you have to buy third party apps, or pay for an up charge to get usable data from the applications.
3   Patrick   2020 Oct 21, 8:19pm  

Automan Empire says
Google Earth. I'm trying to zoom in on a specific spot from a carefully chosen viewing angle. The program wants to show off its 3-D rendering so it changes the tilt of the viewing angle and sometimes even the compass direction. Then it keeps switching to ground view, I force it back, it switches to ground view, I curse and exit ground view, it switches back, I scream QUIT FREAKING CHANGING! at the computer but it keeps doing it.


I don't use Google products, but I do use Bing Maps with cookies and localstorage disabled.

The really annoying thing about Bing Maps is that when you search for something, it pops up details on the left, but then when you close those details it ZOOMS YOU WAY OUT.

WTF? I do not want that. Don't ever zoom in or out unless I personally say so. If I had the time I'd figure out how to change their javascript to not do that.
4   just_passing_through   2020 Oct 21, 8:43pm  

Tenpoundbass says
Windows is a mess now


I hate auto-correct. I hate it in windows and I hate it in Android. I LIKE to misspell things sometimes.. Leave me the eff alone I know what I'm doing.

My car is too old to have any of those issues but I feel your pain man.
5   Eric Holder   2020 Oct 21, 9:53pm  

just_adhom_preaching says
I hate auto-correct. I hate it in windows and I hate it in Android. I LIKE to misspell things sometimes.. Leave me the eff alone I know what I'm doing.


I disable that shit on every device the very first day I receive it. Automatic capitalizing is disabled too.
6   just_passing_through   2020 Oct 21, 9:55pm  

Eric Holder says
I disable that shit on every device the very first day I receive it. Automatic capitalizing is disabled too.


Dood! You just changed my LIFE!

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