patrick.net

According to the telemarketers who have called my friend (with whom I'm staying for a few days):

1) They're my Windows Service Provider and they've received error messages from my computer.
2) They're offering me the opportunity to save money on my electric bill.
3) They're from the IRS and I owe back taxes that can only be resolved by a prepaid credit card asap.
4) They are representing sick vets and they'd like me to help with their patriotic mission.
5) They can save me money on my mortgage.
6) They want me to be safe in my home and can save me money on home security because I live in a high crime area. When I tell them I have a security system ifwith which I am completely satisfied (she doesn't), they ask if I'm locked into a contract and for how long.

My favorite thing to do is to tell them that I'm lonely, that my husband left me and that I just need someone to talk to. I ask them questions and engage them - and then enjoy them trying to extricate themselves from the phone call.

The most awesome thing about all this is that

#housing