patrick.net

Noooooo... this is worse than DemonSex

First fucking hit!!!



Man, what was life like before the freakin' internet.

"Dude there was this french movie about a talking vagina."
"Man, c'mon dude, no way."

TwoScoopsPlissken says

Saw it as a kid on Video Tape, haven't found it since.

Your childhood seems interesting to say the least. Talking French vagina movies? Do you mean kid as in 16 or are we talking younger? How the fuck do you just come across a tape like that? Sorry for all the questions. I can't deny I lol'd at this this. In a good way.

You also still have to laugh that there are 600k plus results for "french movie talking vagina" on google. Can't imagine hitting the images or video tab to unearth those gems.

WookieMan says

Your childhood seems interesting to say the least. Talking French vagina movies? Do you mean kid as in 16 or are we talking younger? How the fuck do you just come across a tape like that? Sorry for all the questions. I can't deny I lol'd at this this. In a good way.

Friend's dad had a videotape store, one of the first. 80% of the business was adult tapes, he pretty much had any porn movie every ported to VHS.

I'm talking maybe 2000+ adult titles.

Friend's dad thought his son should help run the store, so we had a great time. This started around 14, I probably had 5 titles on "rent" from the video store at any given time. When you're 14, well come on man. Even Blockbuster didn't put him out of business, but the internet eventually did.

I probably had seen hundreds of porn movies before age 18.

https://imgur.com/UKRrseN

One of Trump’s biggest criticisms was was when he made fun of a handicapped person, it’s funny how it’s OK when liberals make fun of how someone else speaks, especially when that’s a second language.

https://theamericantribune.com/boom-woke-comedian-loses-half-his-audience-over-anti-trump-jokes/

Woke “Comedian” Loses HALF His Audience Over Anti-Trump Jokes

Late-night star Jimmy Kimmel says that his criticism of Donald Trump is to blame on his massive decline in fans.

According to Kimmel, half of his fans left him after a constant barrage of anti-Trump jokes filled Jimmy Kimmel Live.

“I have lost half of my fans – maybe more than that,” said Kimmel in an appearance on the Naked Lunch podcast.

I can't believe how detestable the guys on TV are now.
Only Maher has some redeeming qualities.
Maybe Conan is funny but I don't recall watching him enough to have an opinion.
I don't know who the old guy with glasses is.
Why do they need to import foreign assholes for TV anyway?
Aren't there any American guys who look like a pig and are annoying? Why need Corden?
The other two suck dick too; why hire them?
Saturday night live was interesting when it began; decades later it's lame.

zzyzzx says

Woke “Comedian” Loses HALF His Audience Over Anti-Trump Jokes

He's a pedophile first and foremost. Why is it in "decent" society we don't do the decent thing to pedophiles like they do in prison?

https://babylonbee.com/news/jimmy-kimmel-sends-tonights-jokes-to-president-xi-for-approval

LOS ANGELES, CA — According to inside sources, comedian Jimmy Kimmel is currently running tonight's Jimmy Kimmel Live! jokes by CCP President Xi for approval, as is his daily custom.

"We have a tremendous round of hilarious jokes for you, O Most Excellent Xi," a nervous Kimmel was overheard saying. "Tonight, I'm going to tell a good one about how President Trump smells like poop. And then I'll tell unvaccinated people to die! Funny, right?"

"Ha Ha Ha. Yes, Jimmy. Velly funny," Xi replied.

Sources say the leader of China benevolently approved all Kimmel's jokes but required him to add at least one hilarious quip about how anyone who says COVID came from the Wuhan lab is a vile racist who should be sent to a Chinese concentration camp.

"Oh, that is a hilarious one, Your Worship!" exclaimed the beloved late-night host. "We will add it to our show right away! Thank you for your most valuable feedback, O Handsome One Who Looks Nothing Like Winnie The Pooh!"

At publishing time, Kimmel was seen running the remainder of his show by several Pfizer execs.

Dan8267 says

Blurtman says

Is Jimmy Kimmel a weepy cuck?

Are you offended that a man cried or that his speech was damn effective at showing what scum Republicans are?

The "Affordable" Health Act was passed under a Democratic congress with a Democratic president. People are stupid to think one party is different than the other at this point. No matter how fucking obvious it is, you can't see it.

This is fake news. Kimmel runs all his skits past the Swiss Octagon, and occasionally, a surly Masonic Overlord from Chatham House. Xi only gives feedback when jokes about organ donors are on the agenda.

clambo says

Only Maher has some redeeming qualities.

I know old comment. I agree/disagree. He's playing to his audience all the time. Wants to be edgy and pandering. Basically push but not too far on either side. He's smart in that he knows if he goes woke he loses 25% of his audience at least. Basically I look at Maher more as an actor than an actual intelligent host.

Everyone here doesn't have writers for them. He does. So we really don't know where he personally stands outside of his publicly displayed persona. He also just has a shit personality and demeanor in my opinion. As in my previous comment he at least isn't Kimmel that flipped from having a show with bikini clad chicks bouncing on trampolines to this woke fag. So Maher get some credit there. He's stuck to his morals basically. I can respect that.

Booger says

You don't have to talk men into voting for Trump, I already have.

Booger says

Enjoy Europe Kimmel. Far worse than America you Hollywood moron. You're a millionaire and I promise you have no clue about European politics. Far worse than here you fucking cry baby.

You had a platform that you got 209k prime demo viewers a night (18-49). Podcasters can get more than that daily. He's irrelevant. No one will miss him.

Then why is he getting fired just now?

MolotovCocktail says

Then why is he getting fired just now?

Why is that slime Stelter back on CNN? Why is Macron still installed in France? Why is Bibi perpetually installed in Israel? Why is fucking Tony Blair still on the scene. They never go away because__________. Fill in the blanks.

Ceffer says

MolotovCocktail says

Then why is he getting fired just now?

Why is that slime Stelter back on CNN? Why is Macron still installed in France? Why is Bibi perpetually installed in Israel? Why is fucking Tony Blair still on the scene. They never go away because__________. Fill in the blanks.

https://youtu.be/5x5Zv2i83cg?feature=shared

https://www.cnbc.com/2025/09/17/charlie-kirk-jimmy-kimmel-abc-disney.html

ABC pulls Jimmy Kimmel show off air ‘indefinitely’ over Charlie Kirk comments

zzyzzx says

https://www.cnbc.com/2025/09/17/charlie-kirk-jimmy-kimmel-abc-disney.html

ABC pulls Jimmy Kimmel show off air ‘indefinitely’ over Charlie Kirk comments

I think it's good, but does anyone actually watch the show anyway? I don't even stumble across video clips of him and if I do, it's an immediate skip.

Even on the Man Show I never liked the guy and that was zero politics. He's really always been an unlikable guy.

I think is was an out for the network, I think the show was loosing money.

RC2006 says

I think is was an out for the network, I think the show was loosing money.

Absolutely. These networks already have political shows on Sundays. Late night was supposed to make you laugh. When the entire monologue is bashing either party it's total trash, mostly conservative because of TDS.

Trump is legitimately funnier than any of these hosts. I think Seth Myers will be next. Fallon will probably go too. I think the late night market is dead.

It's good to document Kimmel verbatim here:

https://www.coffeeandcovid.com/p/alpha-wolf-thursday-september-18

And Jimmy definitely wasn’t funny when, in Monday night’s monologue, he claimed Charlie Kirk’s homosexual assassin was a far-right MAGA conservative. “We hit some new lows over the weekend,” Jimmy unironically said while hitting a new low, “with the MAGA gang desperately trying to characterize this kid who murdered Charlie Kirk as anything other than one of them, and doing everything they can to score political points from it.”

As you can imagine, given the tenderness of the present moment, wild backlash ensued. Trump’s new FCC Commissioner, Brendan Carr, lashed forwards. He said (on a podcast) that, “These companies can find ways to change conduct and take action on Kimmel, or there’s going to be additional work for the F.C.C. ahead.” He never said what the F.C.C.’s additional work would be.

I don’t like cancel culture both ways.

Fortwaye says

I don’t like cancel culture both ways.

Agreed but he wasn't canceled. He spread libel about the MAGA movement. Granted it's hard to prosecute if you target a group but the decision made by the network was purely business driven as they don't want to expose themselves to potentially costly lawsuits. He wasn't canceled for his views, he was let go because he became a financially risky asset for them by deliberately spreading lies.

Fortwaye says

I don’t like cancel culture both ways.

Kimmel hasn't been funny in years.

"But who will pick our crops?”

In order to deter behavior, the punishment must be somewhat disproportionate to the bad behavior. Libtards started cancel culture, and they need to experience an order of magnitude greater than what they dished out in order for them to realize that cancelling is method that is more trouble than it's worth.

That's what MAGA is doing. It's to teach a lesson to those libtards who remain standing and aren't sentenced to decades in prison - don't ever try this shit again.

Patrick says

Not sure if I'm more offended by the people or McDonalds. I throw up with either choice.

https://www.coffeeandcovid.com/p/gone-fishing-friday-september-19

As you know, Iger suspended the show, and he had solid reasons, lots of them, and apart from anything Carr said. That said, existing FCC regulations governing “false information concerning a crime or catastrophe” fully justified Carr’s warning:

The Commission's prohibition against the broadcast of hoaxes is set forth at Section 73.1217 of the Commission's rules, 47 C.F.R.S 73.1217.
This rule prohibits broadcast licensees or permittee from broadcasting false information concerning a crime or a catastrophe if:
1. the licensee knows this information is false;
2. it is foreseeable that broadcast of the information will cause substantial public harm; and
3. broadcast of the information does fact directly cause substantial public harm.

Whatever Brendan Carr did on Tuesday is a tiny crumb compared to the wedding cake of censorship Democrats have been shoving down the media’s throat for generations.

Remember Biden sending FBI agents to Facebook to shut down the Hunter Biden laptop story?

Democrats have kept their tight, iron grip on media and Hollywood out of a credible threat of retaliation. For 20 years, corporate America has been taught to believe Democrats will always punish them if they don’t play progressive ball. What else, for example, are DEI requirements in federal contracting rules? It’s a plain threat: If you don’t adopt DEI, no more contracts.

But, until now, conservatives were not willing or able to play the same game.

We have soared past the point of think-tank debates. The stakes are for Western Civilization itself. The best way to get Democrats to agree to fix the problem they created is by making it into their problem. Yesterday, President Trump defiantly told reporters that one-sided broadcasters should lose their licenses. Game on.

Jimmy Kimmel is not a free speech crisis. Free speech has been under attack by Democrats in government for decades. But as boomers and Gen-Xers know, you can’t solve a bullying problem by making the kids shake hands. Somebody has to punch the bully in the nose.

And … Trump’s strategy is working. Already. Behold the next story.

Yesterday, the New York Times ran an astonishing story headlined, “Democrats Pitch Bill to Protect Speech Targeted by Trump.” It only took one lame comedian. They’re not laughing anymore. ...

The Times explained that yesterday, a group of Senate and House Democrats announced their sudden and unexpected plan to introduce a bill to “bolster legal protections for people targeted by President Trump.” That’s the Times’s framing; the bill, of course, would not be limited to President Trump. Behold, in the Times’s words:

A summary of the bill, entitled the No Political Enemies Act, or
NOPE, outlined a series of legal protections for people targeted for
political speech. It said the bill would create a specific legal defense
for those targeted for political reasons and allow them to recover
attorney fees if they were subjected to government harassment for
expressing their views.
And it would make it easier to sue federal officials for abusing their
power to silence critics.

That actually sounds terrific. Had Americans enjoyed access to a law like NOPE during the pandemic, everything would have been different. This is precisely what has been missing— a viable way for ordinary citizens to sue the government over speech suppression.

As the Democrats well know, the secret sauce is including the right to recover attorney’s fees. That way, public interest lawyers can take these difficult cases even if the client is broke. Clients shouldn’t have to fund these cases anyway.

If the stars in the sky were federal statutes, then only a few tiny, distant dots would represent laws allowing citizens to sue the government. The rest of the sky and the vast arrays of constellations are shielded from suit by a firmament called “sovereign immunity,” which is a blanket rule precluding citizens’ cases against the government absent an authorizing law.

Defying all prediction, somehow, Jimmy Kimmel’s suspension (he isn’t even fired!) has now prompted Democrats into proposing a real solution for one of conservatives’ biggest complaints: the egregious excesses of Twitter files censorship. Since we haven’t yet seen it, who knows whether the NOPE bill’s text will actually have teeth. But things are obviously moving in the right direction.

The turnaround was so astonishing that you could even call it miraculous. Democrats have not exactly championed free speech. After all, they are the party of microaggression, deplatforming, virtue-signaling, social media censorship, hate speech, and cancel culture. We could recite a long list of Democrat cancellation victims. But I’ll just offer this single example from Newsweek, 2022:

The FBI Colluded With Twitter to
Suppress Free Speech. Where Is the
Outrage?
DEC 21, 2022

Where, indeed, was the outrage? Democrats’ current embrace of free speech rhetoric —amid a sea change in the balance of government power— stands in stark contrast to Democrats’ shrugs when censorship involved agencies controlled by their own party.

Back in 2022, Democrats did not introduce any NOPE bills while the dark night of fascism was descending on America. They could hardly remember Senator McCarthy in 2022, never mind invoke his ghost. In fact, in 2022, Democrat think-tanks were publishing Orwellian papers arguing that the First Amendment was obsolete and new laws regulating speech were needed to “protect democracy.”

But now they are clutching the Constitution’s sacred essence like there’s no tomorrow. “The Trump administration should not use the assassination of Mr. Kirk to rip up the First Amendment, Rep. Chrissy Houlahan (D-Pa.) said.”

In other words, Democrats love censorship, except when it’s directed at them, even a little. Their sudden self-interest is wholly contingent on being out of power.

But never mind all the hypocrisy. The point is, we are at the point where Democrats are proposing new laws protecting First Amendment rights and letting citizens sue federal officials who censor them. And, mark my words, rank-and-file Democrats will line up behind this free-speech effort since it’s aimed at Trump.

All it took was for them to believe that conservatives were willing to play the same games they’ve been playing. That, and one suspended late-night host (who is mid at best), plus a non-apologetic Trump threatening even more.

President Trump has done it again. He’s forced the Democrats to adopt his position. If Republicans play this right, we may get everything we ever hoped that the Weaponization Committee could produce.

Now that the shoe's on the other foot, it's all about the 1st amendment. Better late than never for the libtards, only, why do they have to push a law which is superfluous to the First Amendment, unless they never respected it in the first place.

Patrick says

The Commission's prohibition against the broadcast of hoaxes is set forth at Section 73.1217 of the Commission's rules, 47 C.F.R.S 73.1217.
This rule prohibits broadcast licensees or permittee from broadcasting false information concerning a crime or a catastrophe if:
1. the licensee knows this information is false;
2. it is foreseeable that broadcast of the information will cause substantial public harm; and
3. broadcast of the information does fact directly cause substantial public harm.

So why are they still on the air after airing the Russia Hoax, then?