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Anyone lost close friends since the election?


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2018 Aug 30, 9:56pm   6,312 views  36 comments

by BayArea   ➕follow (1)   💰tip   ignore  

This past election has really lead people to pick sides on politics and religion in a way I’ve never seen before.

I have a couple people in my life who were extremely close to me most of my life... we grew up together, played sports together, went to school together, were involved in each others weddings etc.

But since this election it’s become clear that we are 180degrees apart on the topics of politics and religion. It’s greatly strained our relationship.

Has anyone experienced strained or broken relationships with what used to be close friends or family over the past two years due to differing positions on politics/religion?

In both cases it had to do with intolerance and close mindedness that led to the fallout

Comments 1 - 36 of 36        Search these comments

1   clambo   2018 Aug 31, 2:11am  

I have definitely lost some old friends.

It was inevitable since I met them in the liberal milieu of east coast prep schools and later others in Santa Cruz.

The saddest is my younger sister who decades ago married a German and lives over there.

Over time people who have some emotional problems, or have addictions, or who are angry and bitter at how they have spent their lives end up usually liberals.

I had a different perspective since I have lived and worked in Mexico before California. The alarming invasion of Mexico's poor shocked me and of course this issue is the reason Donald Trump won.

I will end up with fewer friends and I think that's how life goes. But, you can make new friends if you have activities you enjoy, e.g. scuba diving, hiking, etc.

I don't mind; I tell my liberal friends they are voting to pick my pocket to give tax money to a stranger and I don't like it.
2   BayArea   2018 Aug 31, 2:18am  

clambo says
The saddest is my younger sister who decades ago married a German and lives over there.


Having a family member marry a liberal and move halfway around the world sounds tragic. I’m sorry for your loss.
3   WookieMan   2018 Aug 31, 4:26am  

BayArea says
close mindedness that led to the fallout


Therein lies the problem. Politics is where they were close minded, but you likely would have found some other topic that they were close minded on as well with the same end results eventually. If an individual is cut off from hearing or listening to another opinion, on any topic, that usually doesn't end well.

I have a neighbor couple that are both community college professors. Both teaching English (very not needed once you get to college, but whatever). Very liberal. Hate Trump. Make jokes at every chance.

Now I'm not a Trump supporter, but have no problem with him except his tendency to be a bit childish. When they make their jokes I just ignore and don't get worked up. People need to understand that those opinions were baked in that persons own "brain kitchen" so to speak. Who wants to hear that the food from their kitchen sucks? Because that's what you're doing when you confront someone's opinion. I take the approach of trying the food and stop eating it if I don't like it. But I'll still have a beer at their establishment.
4   Tenpoundbass   2018 Aug 31, 4:52am  

I had a good friend tell me "I hope you get cancer" when we were debating Obamacare and the possibility of Trump fixing it, back in 2015.
I haven't talked to him since.
5   Bd6r   2018 Aug 31, 7:47am  

WookieMan says
I have a neighbor couple that are both community college professors. Both teaching English (very not needed once you get to college, but whatever). Very liberal. Hate Trump. Make jokes at every chance.

Same here, not Trump supporter but not worked up about his election as well. Since I am college faculty, everyone who meets me automatically assumes that I am rabidly anti-Trump. Which is tolerable up to point where they start spouting childish nonsense (recycled Colbert jokes which stopped being funny a long time ago), when it gets irritating. My solution is to say something mildly positive about Trump and then they shut up. I enjoy being contrarian so this can be amusing.
6   Tenpoundbass   2018 Aug 31, 8:07am  

RafiMaas says
The most divisive president ever!


Obama has set race relations back in this country 100 years. And when anyone from the Black community say... "Whoa No not so fast! I want to just be a human being like the rest of you guys, I'm not with these Commie socialists!"

They get savagely abused, if Trump supporters were giving Kanye as much shit for supporting HIllary as he gets for supporting Trump, all hell would break lose.

Whey are Liberals such disingenuous bastards? They deflect everything they are guilty of at innocent people. They are Agitators, Cheats, Deviants, Freaks, Fraudsters, Cheats, and all around shitty fucking people.

I'm glad I don't have any Liberal friends, I still have Democrat friends. They are the ones that are sitting out this election.

I hope you shitbirds got enough Commie constituency, the Democrat voters are leaving your sorry asses on the battle field to get slaughtered.
7   Automan Empire   2018 Aug 31, 12:11pm  

Since the last election not so much.

I've been active in politics since the late 80s. The landscape changed most dramatically from 2000-2001, with the election debacle, 9/11, and Iraq War being the big drivers.

Before, debates were intense and vitriolic, but there was still a sense that all parties were fellow Americans albeit with different means to reach common goals.

After 9/11, we went from all banded together as Americans, to Republicans identifying anyone who disagreed with them as anti-American, even subhuman. Discussions stopped including facts, it became all ad hominem. You were either a Republican and didn't question the administration, or you were the enemy of the country. No gray area or nuance.

People who bitched through the Clinton years spent the Bush years blaming everything on Clinton without basis or proof and wouldn't take "Clinton isn't president any more" as a response. The day Obama took office, everything became Obama's fault and "Bush isn't President anymore" became the stock response to any mention of his policies and legacy no matter how carefully documented and proven. Now I see Obama blamed for current problems by the same people, and blaming the left has taken the place for accountability for the current administration.

I've been watching this for decades. That's why I have nothing but disgust for those today who use the word liberal as a pejorative and scapegoat for everything wrong, while Republican shit doesn't stink.

The black and white, us versus them mentality is effectively forfeiting citizen control over government by keeping us divided over petty things, never to come together in a genuinely dangerous to entrenched interests voting bloc. Solutions might require replacing the two party, winner takes all system we have. This system no longer offers us meaningful choices and control, just the choice of whether you publicly suck a blue or red dick.
8   mell   2018 Aug 31, 12:17pm  

clambo says
The saddest is my younger sister who decades ago married a German and lives over there.


The European but esp. German media is owned by leftoids globalist plutocrats and/or government controlled like Pravda once. Cut them some slack as they don't know better. However a growing number of Germans is rising up and joining the Trump train to make Germany great again. Hopefully they'll push through.
9   mell   2018 Aug 31, 12:26pm  

Automan Empire says
I've been watching this for decades. That's why I have nothing but disgust for those today who use the word liberal as a pejorative and scapegoat for everything wrong, while Republican shit doesn't stink.


You're not grounded in reality. I have many to the right and many to the left of me. The righties accept my differences with them and are able to have a constructive debate while remaining friends. The lefties go into temper tantrum mode and passive-aggressively cancel their friendship or ask every 2 seconds why I am a Nazi. Seriously? What earth do you live on. I have no problems with differing opinions but 80% of the lefties do these days, not to mention that today's labeled right wingers were old school heartland democrats not long ago.
10   mell   2018 Aug 31, 12:31pm  

A few, some exes with sour grapes they lost MAGA ballz. I have always mostly stayed curteous and explained my stances on illegal immigration, taxes, aff. action etc. But alas, everything rays cyst these days ;)
11   BayArea   2018 Aug 31, 12:32pm  

Automan Empire says
Since the last election not so much.

Republicans identifying anyone who disagreed with them as anti-American, even subhuman...


It’s 2018 and what you describe is today’s left.
12   BayArea   2018 Aug 31, 2:10pm  

Yes, when I read the title back, I thought it might sound like lost as in died.

Nope, I just mean broken relationships
13   komputodo   2018 Aug 31, 2:17pm  

BayArea says
Anyone lost close friends since the election?


No but I have several acquaintances that I now avoid...Tenpoundbass says
I had a good friend tell me "I hope you get cancer" when we were debating Obamacare and the possibility of Trump fixing it, back in 2015.


That's seriously fucked up..
14   komputodo   2018 Aug 31, 2:30pm  

RafiMaas says
The most divisive president ever!


It's too easy to blame Trump for all this childish behavior and mass hysteria after the election. Normal people are still doing what they did before the election. Going to work, paying the bills, bbqs in the backyard...Life continues...no major crises...only imaginary ones...as a matter of fact, if there was no media stoking the flames, nobody would even care that Trump is the president.
15   komputodo   2018 Aug 31, 2:33pm  

clambo says
I had a different perspective since I have lived and worked in Mexico before California.


Do you miss it at all?
16   FortWayne   2018 Aug 31, 2:37pm  

Never had friends like that. Real friends don’t do that sort of thing.

Neighbors... yes, but we were never friends.
17   NDrLoR   2018 Aug 31, 2:48pm  

komputodo says
Normal people are still doing what they did before the election
That's what I can't understand about my band leader's parents, probably in their early 60's, both sweet people whom I get along with. We often eat together at Norma's Cafe in Oak Cliff before his shows at the Kessler Theater across the street. But from November 9 on it has virtually destroyed his mother. She rants and raves and obsesses on Facebook about how she hates anyone who likes Trump, so I'm careful not to mention anything political. She also hates everything religious, especially Christian and her husband follows suit. I can't see how in any shape, form or fashion their lives were changed by the election. They had been renters all their lives until some time last year they bought a nice house in the Casa View part of Dallas and it looks like a nice home and neighborhood and know they are enjoying it. I don't know how their lives would be any different or better if Hillary had won. Their son and his wife are going to have to leave Dallas for Cincinnati as they had to move out of their rental and simply can't afford the escalating prices in Dallas, even though he stays busy with gigs all the time and she works. I'm sure his parents are unhappy about that, but that has nothing to do with the election.
18   clambo   2018 Aug 31, 3:10pm  

@kompudodo asks if I miss Mexico at all.

I do sometimes. Where I lived was underdeveloped and largely empty and interesting. I lived in Baja Sur which I would call "Mexico Lite". There was not the crowding and the pace was nice and slow.

I have returned often since I could drive down from N. California in 3 days.

Generally I had fun and older people were polite and friendly.
19   Goran_K   2018 Aug 31, 3:13pm  

BayArea says
It’s 2018 and what you describe is today’s left.


This is blatantly obvious to anyone who is being impartial.
20   RC2006   2018 Aug 31, 6:28pm  

One of my best friends that moved to the SF 15yrs ago and lived there for about 10 before moving back to Orange County was completely brainwashed. It started with just random anti Republican comments on Facebook that had nothing to do with anything. Then after Trump was elected he and another acquaintance started texting me Fuck Trump and all sorts of other messages. I haven’t even talked about politics with these guys in a decade. It got to the point that I blocked him and sent him a long email about how he needs to grow up, start taking care of his kid that he doesn’t even financially or emotionally support, and that I thought he was an alcoholic. After that he apologized and we haven’t talked much since .He stopped maturing when he moved to SF, it really warped him. This guy was in my wedding, and was part of a tight group of friends from teens all the way up into my mid 30s.
21   BayArea   2018 Aug 31, 6:31pm  

Interesting RC... I feel like mid-30s is when this sort of things starts happening. At that point people are coming into their own and get set in their ways.
22   Patrick   2018 Aug 31, 6:49pm  

dr6B says
I enjoy being contrarian so this can be amusing.


Same here. Whatever opinion I'm told I must not hold immediately becomes very attractive, if only for the amusement.
23   Shaman   2018 Aug 31, 7:15pm  

jazz_music says
The worst part of this election is what it revealed to us about our fellow men.


Here lies the difference between liberals and conservatives. Liberals believe in the innate goodness of mankind, that everyone wants to be upright and helpful and moral more or less.
Conservatives know that this isn’t true, that such people are rare and the rest of the ones who appear this way are just pretending. They know that people must be provided with incentives to be good and virtuous and hardworking.

So yes, an election where conservatives won and then immediately fixed several intractable problems left over from Liberal rule does show them something about their fellow man they never wanted to believe.
Belief doesn’t make reality, however. Just try believing really hard that you can fly, and then jump off a bridge if you disagree with me. And
24   LastMan   2018 Sep 1, 5:07pm  

mell says
You're not grounded in reality. I have many to the right and many to the left of me. The righties accept my differences with them and are able to have a constructive debate while remaining friends. The lefties go into temper tantrum mode and passive-aggressively cancel their friendship or ask every 2 seconds why I am a Nazi.


This is because you're on the right. You can agree with people that have the same beliefs, and can't agree with people that don't. Big surprise.
25   lostand confused   2018 Sep 1, 5:29pm  

Quigley says
Conservatives know that this isn’t true, that such people are rare and the rest of the ones who appear this way are just pretending. They know that people must be provided with incentives to be good and virtuous and hardworking


Yup it is a much bigger battle between the participation trophy brigade of communism where all are equal and the antural order-where different people have different talents and freedom to fail, to succeed, to live life based on what you desire.

The fundamental nature of this very country is at stake-liberlas offer nothing new-except the failed policies of the former Soviet union, pol pot and Nazi Germany.
26   mell   2018 Sep 1, 7:56pm  

LastMan says
mell says
You're not grounded in reality. I have many to the right and many to the left of me. The righties accept my differences with them and are able to have a constructive debate while remaining friends. The lefties go into temper tantrum mode and passive-aggressively cancel their friendship or ask every 2 seconds why I am a Nazi.


This is because you're on the right. You can agree with people that have the same beliefs, and can't agree with people that don't. Big surprise.


I'm neither left nor right but right-leaning Libertarian or original Liberal (bourgeoisie) comes closest. Plenty of stuff to disagree with on both sides. My point stands. Leftoids fall into immediate TDS rezist! rays cyst anti-nazi temper tantrum if I agree with Trump only on a few counts such as strong borders, no sanctuary cities and a tough stance on illegal immigration. The right does not do that when I advocate for legalization of drugs and prostitution, or a short time-window compromise on abortion.
27   CaltRightCrazy   2018 Sep 1, 9:32pm  

Quigley says
Liberals believe in the innate goodness of mankind, that everyone wants to be upright

Narcissists for example STUPIDLY believe that they are the gifted ones who have a brain and so people are to be used and discarded as dumb animals.

STUPID PEOPLE for ANOTHER example believe that they are the gifted ones who have a brain.

This is a salient and categorical trait of stupid people, the reality does not match up to the belief, but their feeling of being that special person that has the smarts still will not leave them susceptible to accurately evaluating their own reality. When you see this you say "there is a stupid person." Ok they think you are full of shit.

One has got to be able to assume that people understand the difference between right and wrong, that right is good and wrong is bad. Fuck, I can't even believe that I am explaining this.

No other truth except through Trump, eh? All the rest is fake?

Did you have to fall for the big bull shitter? Really?

BASICALLY if you ever, EVER meet a guy with a sketchy reputation like Trump, who talks a lot of shit like he can read your mind and say exactly what you were hoping to hear, that he is capable of doing all these great things, exactly what you wanted to hear; you should run like hell. Get away ASAP! RUN!!!

But never never NEVER let yourself listen to him and all his inevitably glorious bullshit. Jesus or no Jesus, cosmic muffins, master race, jews, arabs, blacks, Mexicans, whatever.

You look at people's history. Every business knows this and lives by it. WTF?

Ignore basic truths and there will be consequences. There will be suffering. Suffering is bad, okay? E.g.

Jim Jones,

Charles Manson,

David Koresh,

L Ron Hubbard,

Rod Ferrell,

Ron Drew,

Jeffrey Lundgren,

Adolf Hitler,

Benito Mussolini,

Valentina de Andrade,

Robin Gecht,

Ervil Morrell LeBaron,

Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh,

Marshal Applewhite,

Sun Myung Moon,

David “Moses” Berg,

Warren Jeffs,

Elbert Eugene Spriggs,

Shoko Asahara,

Joseph Di Mambro.

I guarantee it!!! --so watch out what happens now!!! Watch the devastation that is happening offstage while Trump conducts his circus for the media to devour and convert into click bait. --Get a new Trump mortgage now!

I am Liberals, I am Left wing, and I approve of this message.
28   CaltRightCrazy   2018 Sep 1, 9:49pm  

Trump’s circus act is a sinister distraction

The circus act children love the most is the one that is meant to distract them. When the clown comes out, the kids have eyes for nothing else. Little do they notice the scenery changes in the background. Elephants may be replaced by trapeze artists. Flame eaters supplant the lions. But the children stay riveted on the clown in the spotlight.

Donald Trump is the circus maestro of our age. Since the US president took office, he has upended America’s regulatory culture. Steve Bannon, his former chief strategist, described it as the “deconstruction of the administrative state”. Most of us are too entertained to pay close attention. Much as the media love to hate Mr Trump, he is the gift that keeps on giving. Traffic is booming. Advertising dollars keep flowing in.
29   Shaman   2018 Sep 1, 10:03pm  

Call It Crazy says
Suffering is bad, okay?


Suffering is necessary.

Understand why, and you’ll be a wiser man.
30   CaltRightCrazy   2018 Sep 1, 10:13pm  

Quigley says
Suffering is necessary.

To cull the amount of stupid people?

Tell that to those who lost family in German ovens, etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., all throughout the bloody history of the human race.
31   clambo   2018 Sep 2, 4:36am  

Donald Trump didn't run on political positions he convinced people to support; they already had these positions and he was popular because he agreed with the voters.
32   lostand confused   2018 Sep 2, 5:22am  

Call It Crazy says
Tell that to those who lost family in German ovens, etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., all throughout the bloody history of the human race.

Another reason why you should not vote for socialists/dems. Nazis were socialists.
33   mell   2018 Sep 2, 5:41am  

Call It Crazy says
Trump’s circus act is a sinister distraction

The circus act children love the most is the one that is meant to distract them. When the clown comes out, the kids have eyes for nothing else. Little do they notice the scenery changes in the background. Elephants may be replaced by trapeze artists. Flame eaters supplant the lions. But the children stay riveted on the clown in the spotlight.

Donald Trump is the circus maestro of our age. Since the US president took office, he has upended America’s regulatory culture. Steve Bannon, his former chief strategist, described it as the “deconstruction of the administrative state”. Most of us are too entertained to pay close attention. Much as the media love to hate Mr Trump, he is the gift that keeps on giving. Traffic is booming. Advertising dollars keep flowing in.


A circus act by definition has no real effect. Trumps policies do, esp. wrt illegal immigration and global wage suppression. They lead to a more prosperous nation for its citizens. You may not agree with the policies but they are far from circus acts. First real change in decades.
34   Y   2018 Sep 2, 6:45am  

Maybe you misinderstood.
Maybe he meant he hopes you cure cancer.
Maybe.
Tenpoundbass says
I had a good friend tell me "I hope you get cancer" when we were debating Obamacare and the possibility of Trump fixing it, back in 2015.
I haven't talked to him since.
35   everything   2018 Sep 2, 10:07am  

Corporations own the politicians now, they own America, the parties are really the same, they just have different ways of pillaging and robbing, gotta pick a club, gotta be compartmentalized, if you go independent your a nobody, but a great way to keep the masses at odds with one another. It should be pretty obvious by now, both parties are sleeping together. We are a popularity contest society. I see people change the way they talk and act by who's president and what they are fed via the boob tube.
36   mell   2018 Sep 2, 11:05am  

everything says
Corporations own the politicians now, they own America, the parties are really the same, they just have different ways of pillaging and robbing, gotta pick a club, gotta be compartmentalized, if you go independent your a nobody, but a great way to keep the masses at odds with one another. It should be pretty obvious by now, both parties are sleeping together. We are a popularity contest society. I see people change the way they talk and act by who's president and what they are fed via the boob tube.


Usually true but doesn't apply to Trump.

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