patrick.net

It's become more and more obvious over the years that America doesn't like single, straight men. What we are, are Freebirds (see Lynyrd Skynyrd for reference).

So the plan is this ... Rin decides to 'come out of the closet' and tell the world that he's gay and that all that heterosexual hoeing up in Montreal was just his way of hiding from himself.

And then, when ppl ask why I don't hang out in the South End of Boston (see Boston's gay enclave) and date men, I'll fall back to the old one liner ... 'I never met the right one'.

So then, I'll be seen as this true purist, who's into "love for love's sake" and not some serial humper, hopping from one gay bar to another. I will then have to become a closet heterosexual, wearing disguises while using stunt doubles, whenever I bang French-Canadian babes, so that the stunt double is seen, only in Montreal's Le Village gai (the Quebecois version of Boston's South End), trying to find his "soulmate".

This is it. I can win the Presidency with the above tactic.