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Chapter 33 The Era of Impeachment, 2020-52

At this time the North Central American province was still independent and under the system of governance known as ‘liberal democracy’, described in Chapter 29. Liberal democracy was drawn from the same corrupt well of late-western philosophy as the Marxism that had colonized Chinese political institutions in the century before the Great Restoration and obscured the Kingly Way of Benevolent Governance. Both systems are now deservedly condemned by the House of Scholars. ...

The ceremonial elaboration of impeachment grew in proportion to its futility. The House chamber was hung with plastic American flags, copies of the Fundamental Laws and large banners declaring ‘Impeached!’ Soft patriotic music and the score from a film called The American President played in the background. The biggest Talker in the House of the People (‘Speaker’ in English) began the rite with a formal proclamation that the demagogue of the enemy faction was ‘impeached forever’. There followed a series of cryptic prayers to the gods of Progress, calling upon them to preserve the people’s sacred rights to infanticide, correct speech and a nation free from fireworks. The solemn execrations (‘articles’ in English) were then read out and signed by the Talker with a special silver-tipped pen in the shape of a bullet. Replicas of the pen were distributed on gold-plated trays to each of the Manipulators (‘Managers’ in English) and to the chief financial supporters of the majority faction who, being ritually impure, waited outside in the hallways (‘lobbies’ in English). ...

The annual impeachment rites lasted until 2052, when they were suppressed by order of the hegemon Jeffrey III, Lord Bezos. Lord Bezos put an end to the competition for political power among rival hegemons (‘billionaires’ in English) when he acquired a majority stake in all 30 components of the Dow Jones Industrial Average, the predecessor of the Beijing Universal Economic Rating. The nation burst into spontaneous rejoicing at the restoration of peace and on-time fulfillment.

In the following year, Lord Bezos guided North Central America into the safe port of monarchy when, to universal jubilation, he transferred full ownership of North Central America to Emperor Lao the Great of the Middle Kingdom. In recompense for his loyal service (‘quid pro quo’ in English), Emperor Lao confirmed Lord Bezos as the first Prince of Central North America, consented to the merger of AmazonUniverse with Alibaba Eurasia, and appointed him exclusive supplier of Confucian classics to state schools as well as all prayer books and chanting manuals used in the state religion of Yesu-Buddha.