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Twitter Shuts Down Entire Network To Slow Spread Of Negative Biden News


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2020 Oct 16, 8:15am   514 views  6 comments

by Patrick   ➕follow (55)   💰tip   ignore  

https://babylonbee.com/news/twitter-shuts-down-entire-network-to-slow-spread-of-negative-biden-news

SAN FRANCISCO, CA—In a last-ditch effort to stop negative stories about Joe Biden and his family from spreading, Twitter shut down its entire social network Thursday.

After seeing account after account tweet out one particularly bad story, CEO Jack Dorsey realized he had to take action. Dorsey smashed a glass box in his office reading "Break In Case Of Bad Publicity For Democrats." Inside the case was a sledgehammer for smashing Twitter's servers.

"Red alert -- shut the servers down! Shut them all down!"

Dorsey ran downstairs and started smashing as many computers as he could, but he did need to ask for some help, as the hammer was pretty heavy. None of the programmers could lift the hammer, either. Eventually, they managed to program a robot to pick up the sledgehammer and smash the servers.

After hearing the Twitter employees talk about critical theory, the robot got woke and began attacking all the cis white males.


Comments 1 - 6 of 6        Search these comments

1   Patrick   2020 Oct 16, 8:19am  

That was humor, but it's damn close to actual reality, where no one is allowed to mention the millions paid to Hunter Biden by China and Ukraine:

2   clambo   2020 Oct 16, 9:33am  

Joe Biden made a basic, huge mistake; he had a business relationship with a crackhead loser who
impregnated a stripper. In this case, it was his son Hunter.

I learned from my own experience, nothing good comes and often bad things come from associations with these losers.

Worse, stuff on laptops which incriminates them was left hanging around repair shops; that’s not covering your tracks very well.

They and the media, Twitter, Facebook, Google, can all go to hell.
3   FortwayeAsFuckJoeBiden   2020 Oct 16, 9:35am  

Funniest part is in the end of the article about woke robot.
4   Al_Sharpton_for_President   2020 Oct 16, 9:45am  

Big Tech is at the very heart of the neo-liberal dogma of the US exiting manufacturing, and becoming a FIRE and Tech industry country. So the goal is to go from making valuable physical items and employing average folks, to an economy based upon frivolous and unecessary apps and digital transactions that offer a fraction of the population a decent wage. Any threat to return to a manufacturing economy threatens the Tech paper titans, who are orienting their silly apps that are occupying more and more of the attention of under and unemployed citizens against candidates like Trump.
5   rocketjoe79   2020 Oct 16, 10:16am  

This could all be a fake to start with, the timing is suspect. But, it pales in significance to the Coup Attempt by Hiliary, Obama and the FBI. Most media reuses to cover the story - on purpose.
6   MisdemeanorRebel   2020 Oct 16, 10:29am  

clambo says
I learned from my own experience, nothing good comes and often bad things come from associations with these losers.


Overview of Law #10: Infection: Avoid the Unhappy and the Unlucky. People who are perpetually miserable spread misery like an infection, and they'll drown you in it. Avoid these people like the plague. Conversely, if you associate with happy people, you'll share in the good fortune they attract and spread.

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