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Good explanation of how shaming tactics cause mass anger

By Patrick follow Patrick   2022 Feb 23, 2:04pm 149 views  3 comments           share      

https://www.hennessysview.com/p/why-shame-affects-men-more-than-women?source=patrick.net


Shame Men Enough, and There Will Be Hell to Pay

Bill Hennessy
Feb 21

... To summarize, society has so narrowed the path of acceptable behavior, speech, and thought that no one can stay on the path. No one. it’s impossible because the thread-thin path is constantly shifting.

In Kaczynski’s view, this leads people, especially men, to feel extreme shame. They come to believe they are defective, and that’s exactly what society wants—people who feel ashamed of themselves and unworthy of making their own decisions. ...

According to psychologists, men and women are different. Men and boys are more subject to hyperarousal than women and girls. Anyone who’s raised both sons and daughters knows this. Boys get wound up and stay wound up more than girls.

Counselors Patricia Love, Ed.D., and Steven Stosny, Ph.D., describe hyperarousal as an evolutionary advantage for males. Being significantly stronger and larger than women, males’ hyperarousal allows them to respond quickly to threats. Moreover, studies have shown that males feel pain less intensely than women and are less fearful than women. That’s why men and boys do dangerous things for fun. (Women do, too, but if you took 1,000 men and 1,000 women and watched them for a year, the men would be about four times as likely to receive injuries from their own recklessness.) Men are more likely to engage in thrill-seeking activities than women.

Fear of injury and isolation drive women, while avoidance of shame (or failure) drives men.

From their book How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It, the pair writes:

So how does the male propensity for hyperarousal translate into hypersensitivity to shame? First of all, boys and girls both experience shame, which is a stop-and-hide response. The root meaning of the word shame is “to cover or conceal.” When you're embarrassed you want to crawl into a hole, and a child feeling shame wants to cover his face because he can't bear to look at you. If you are playing with a boy or girl infant and you suddenly break eye contact and turn away, he or she will experience the physical displays of shame: reddened face, contorted facial expressions, writhing muscles, and other signs of more general distress, especially if he/she was interested in or enjoying the eye contact. . . . Males who experience this over and over develop a hypersensitivity to shame.1

Interesting that our knee-jerk reaction to shame is to cover our faces, is it not? (The more you read, the more you see the psychology behind the pandemic response.)

Love and Stony write about marital relationships, not mass murder or tyrannical government. But people are people. The male tendency to avoid shame more than physical injury transcends categories. Men avoid shame in all situations, which is why they do risky things. Backing down from a challenge to try to jump across a chasm would bring shame—so men jump. We rationalize that we’d rather fall to our death than be known as a coward. A woman given the same challenge would respond, “No. That’s stupid.”

(If, however, the woman faced with jumping or being left alone, she’d likely jump. Isolation is to the woman what shame is to the man.)

Let’s unpack this paragraph on the source of many troubled male-female relationships:

What women have an even harder time understanding is this: For the average male, relationships are not a reliable source of comfort. A man's greatest pain comes from shame, due to the inadequacy he feels in relationships; therefore, going to the relationship for comfort is like seeking solace from the enemy. Talking about the relationship, which is guaranteed to remind him of his inadequacy, is the last method he would use for comfort, in the same category as choosing a bed of nails for a good night's sleep. This is why he often goes to a fight-or-flight response to ease his distress and not to a heart-to-heart talk with the woman in his life. Fight or flight is the male equivalent of tend and befriend.

And what happens when the woman continues to demand he talk about their relationship? Eventually, anger and aggression.

The male fight-or-flight response is seen most commonly in acts of aggression and competitiveness. You have, no doubt, watched boys act out these behaviors in the neighborhood, on the school playground, and in your living room. To appreciate the relationship of aggression to shame, you have to understand only what these powerful emotional states do to your mind and body. With heavy doses of cortisol, shame hurts like hell and drains off all available energy—all you want to do is crawl into a hole. Its message is that something is producing rejection or failure—stop it and cover it up! Anger comes to the rescue with its analgesic and amphetaminelike effects that numb the pain and give a surge of energy. (This is why wounded animals are so ferocious and athletes can break a bone in a game and not even know it.) 3

How does this lead to teenage boys shooting up a movie a theatre or Ted Kaczynski sending exploding letters to college professors?

Anger and aggression ward off shame by numbing its pain and filling the void of energy it depletes. All you have to do to make a man verbally or physically aggressive is threaten him with shame: “You're a wimp, a loser, a dud, and you have a small penis!” As they used to say in the Westerns that men love so much, “Them's fightin' words!”4

Men in America in 2022 are struck by fighting words every moment of every day. The war on men began, in earnest, in the 1970s when men, especially fathers, were portrayed as idiots, misogynists, and racists in television, books, movies, and commercials.

In other words, our culture has bombarded three generations of boys and men with “You’re a wimp, a loser, a dud, and you have a small penis!” Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. This message comes from teachers, mothers, girlfriends, priests, Hollywood action stars, pop music, politicians, and the evening news.

Yet, we’re surprised when the occasional male grabs a machete and tears through a suburban mall.

This is not to excuse murder and mayhem. It’s to point out that violence is the predictable result of a society bent on shaming men into submission. A percentage of men will absolutely revolt and relieve their pain with the analgesic of anger and aggression. Chances are, more women would commit heinous crimes if society put similar energy into socially isolating them and bombarding them with fear messaging.

You can probably see where this is going.

The official response to the Covid epidemic has come down to two constant messages:

Fear.

Shame

This was not a mistake or an accident. Doctors Love and Stosny are not gnostics who alone know the secret of men and women and what drives them. Though the “experts” will publicly deny there is any fundamental differences between men and women, they quietly exploit the known biological differences to drive both into submission.

Fear for women; shame for men.

In the perfect dosages, fear and shame work like mass hypnosis. Hundreds of millions of people do exactly what you want.

But when the fear and shame become intolerable—when the authoritarians go too far—men and women alike will fight back against it. That’s when things go sideway. That’s when large numbers of people decide they are no longer willing (or able) to coexist with their society. That’s when empires crumble.

A Revolution Is Coming Fast

When tyrants push people far enough, fast enough, people rebel. These rebellions are usually short and limited in scope. But every 80 to 100 years, the tyrants push harder and faster, and the people revolt. And not all revolutions look alike. When we hear “revolution,” we think of the American colonies or French in the 18th century. But the US Civil War…
Read more
4 days ago · 4 likes · 3 comments · Bill Hennessy

Ted Kaczynski was right. Oversocialization—over-use of fear and shame—drives certain individuals to lash out at the source. It’s taken 30 years, but society is finally approaching the apex of this conflict between human nature and authoritarian messaging. The dam is about to break.

In Canada, we see police brutalizing reporters who are trying to expose police brutality of protesters. In America, we see a cabal of government, medicine, and technology attempting to outlaw dissent. In San Francisco, parents united to kick out school board members in a recall election. And, from California a caravan of big rigs is rolling out to shut down the nation’s capital. Most ominously, Joe Biden secretly made the national state of emergency permanent.

The authoritarians of the New World Order frightened and shamed us for two years. For two years, we cowered in fear and covered our faces in shame. But the fear and shame didn’t go away—they got more intense.

At some point, we would rather die fighting than live another day in such unrelenting fear and shame. When that day comes, our fear and shame transfers to them. Woe to Dr. Fauci when that day comes.

And that day is coming.
1   Patrick   2022 Feb 23, 2:08pm  

And here's a good example of someone who knows and feels exactly that anger caused by the mass-shaming techniques of the woke media:

https://bherr.substack.com/p/sugar-for-the-feeble-minded/comments?source=patrick.net


I have a very high need for respect. I don’t like to be told what to do, say, feel, think, or how to act. There’s a lot of deep-seeded reasons for that, including the fact that I grew up in a strict, mildly-repressive home. Filled with love and safety, mind you, which I’m very grateful for. But MTV was forbidden, and I had to sneak that. “Secular” music was unacceptable. I had to sneak that. Youth group was the pre-determined, preferred social circle.

By the time the end of high school came, I was kicking down every door and rebelling against every wall that was put up. It was a messy time, for a long time.

I wasn’t made to be caged. Not physically, not with expectations, not with demands. Not with anything.

With that said, you can probably imagine how difficult the last few years have been on me, and most likely yourself, in that respect. At every turn, the assault of the tyrants poked viciously and decisively on every hurt I ever grew up with.

“Stay the fuck home”

“Your mask protect me, my mask protects you”

“It’s for the greater good”

“Stay Safe. Save Lives”

“Let’s all do our part”

“Masks required”

“You can’t go here without proof of vaccination”

“You can’t say that”

“Your freedom ends where my safety begins”

“Walk THIS way down the aisle because now it’s one way”

“Stand on this little stupid fucking dot 6 feet apart even though this is really just a nonscientific exercise in utter horseshit”

I remember in kindergarten we had our little rugs. Our little squares of real estate that we could stretch out and take naps on when the teacher told us it was time. The more I saw those little dots and arrows in stores and businesses, the more I just wanted to fuggin’ puke, because to me, there was no clearer indication we really were all just back in kindergarten.

And everyone seemed TOTALLY cool with it. Adults. TOTALLY cool with being treated like children.

Excuse me if you sense some scorn here. It’s visceral to me.

The fact that we have a ruling class that 1000% sees us as children in a romper room absolutely makes my blood boil. Who the FUCK are these people to suppose that they know a damn thing about me, about you, but furthermore, to assume they have some kind of authority and right to treat me this way?

I’ve made really complicated, heavy decisions in my life, as have you. The fact that their condescending scorn and tone-deaf arrogance have impacted my life for one second really burns my ass, let alone two years. The fact that they’ve been able to freely walk the halls of the school house and sit in the teacher’s lounge, completely disregarding the rules that they so sternly chastise us about, is absolutely despicable.
2   Patrick   2022 Jun 21, 10:50am  

https://twitchy.com/samj-3930/2022/06/20/mic-drop-18-year-old-white-male-decimates-white-liberal-female-doctor-tsk-tsking-white-middle-school-boys-for-going-alt-right-in-epic-thread/


My teen told me something that's been haunting me for weeks.

He said, "I think almost every white middle school boy is in the alt-right pipeline — at some point — until something/someone pulls them out."

Somehow, Youngus's message came to the attention of Daniel Schmidt, an 18-year-old freshman at the University of Chicago, who remembers very well his middle-school years, not to mention the journey through high school. Here is his Twitter thread, unrolled:

I'm an 18-year-old white male. I was in middle school only 5 years ago.

I think I can offer some perspective on @dannagal's thread.

Yes, young white males increasingly identify as right-wing.

But why?

From my experience, here's what's really happening:

Thought experiment:

Imagine you're an 8th-grade boy. You're beginning to be told by teachers, the media, and maybe your parents that you're privileged because you're a boy. It's a basic truth, you're told.

But this just makes you confused. You start asking yourself questions. If boys are privileged, why do the girls in my class tend to get better grades?

Why are there more girls than boys in my advanced classes?

Why are the girls more well-behaved and focused?

Why are some of the girls preparing for college applications already? By the time you get to high school, your confusion only grows.

Your friend, who used to go to church with you, has become addicted to porn. Another friend, whose parents have recently divorced, has started using drugs.

Your friends start appearing unmotivated and demoralized. Meanwhile, the girls at your school continue to be over-represented in honors classes, get better test scores and grades, obtain more leadership positions, and participate in more extracurriculars.

But you're still repeatedly told that boys are privileged. How could this be? Then, when college acceptances come out, you notice many more girls than boys get into top universities. More girls are going to college in general, for that matter.

Image: Smiling school boy (edited) by stockking.

But for some reason, all you hear is that girls are underrepresented in higher education. It's confusing. When you search for scholarships to apply to, you find hundreds that are only open to women.

When you tour college campuses, you hear how proud the school is to have student organizations like Women in Law, Women in Business, and Women in Science.

It all becomes too much. You start doing research.

You discover that men are more likely to be homeless, go to prison, become alcoholics, struggle with isolation/loneliness, die of a drug overdose, and commit suicide.

But all you hear about, for some reason, is something called the "gender pay gap."

Eventually, you find out that the only people who seem to talk about the issues facing men — the only people who appear to sympathize with how you feel — are so-called "alt-right" figures like Jordan Peterson.

You start listening to them. For once, you feel like you're not alone. Now imagine you're an 8th-grade white boy.

On top of the alienation you experience for merely being a boy, you're told by teachers, the media, and maybe even your parents that you should feel some form of remorse for being white.

You're as privileged as it gets, you're told. This doesn't make much sense to you. Why should you feel bad for being white — something you can't control?

This is a question you and your white classmates implicitly know cannot be asked. So instead, all of you submit. Humiliation quickly leads to demoralization. As you get older, you feel increasingly unwelcome by society. "Diversity and inclusion" initiatives and never-ending anti-white messaging from the media only make you feel like a burden.

So you turn to the Internet, where you feel welcome by video games and right-wing forums. Younger and younger white males are following this path. They feel they're simply unwelcome by society, and they escape to a select few communities and websites.

For the first time in America's history, the founding demographic is dropping out of society in massive numbers. Dr. Danna Young's solution?

"Inclusive programming and a critical historical lens."

It's almost like their goal is to demoralize and demonize young men — the group most likely to challenge our ruling class.
3   SunnyvaleCA   2022 Jun 21, 1:08pm  

Patrick says

But all you hear about, for some reason, is something called the "gender pay gap."

I suspect that the gender pay gap is reversed now in some cases. When men and women do "the same" job they get the same pay, but if it's a physically demanding job, the men are often expected to go the extra mile in the lifting and hauling and dirty/dangerous parts.

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