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In a brief statement, Trudeau called for privacy as his life crumbled around him. "Please stop asking if Sophie was really a woman," said a tearful Trudeau. "You're hurting my feelings! Sophie is real. She's real! The next person who asks is getting curb stomped by a Mountie!"
Trudeau's Canadian wife, who no one has ever seen and may not exist, has reportedly had her bank account and assets frozen pending reconciliation. If she returns home and lets her husband decorate the living room of the Rideau Cottage the way he wants, she will be welcomed back with open arms. "The ball is in her court," Trudeau maintained. "She has to stop having her own opinions and feelings."
"Or else," he added ominously.
💉 Finally, to help start your weekend off right, for your Friday amusement, enjoy this comical public service announcement from Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau. Remember ladies, he’s single again!:
The “booster advisory” clip shows a slack-jawed, chuckling, lightly tattooed man sitting in a chair and getting his shoulders wiped with prep pads. That’s it. For the life of me, I can’t understand why they would so obviously cut away —twice— deliberately not showing the injections, which were the whole point of the message.
Maybe the Prime Minister cried when he got the real shots, and they had to film it over again, once he was feeling better and had his lollipop.
OTTAWA — A new law passed in Canada this week required all men's room across the country to stock tampons in case Justin Trudeau pops in and happens to be on "that time of the month," sources confirmed Wednesday morning.
Dubbed "Trudeau's Law," the new regulation ensures that men's rooms will have everything the Prime Minister requires for his visits to the bathroom, from tampons to thick, extra-absorbent pads "for those heavy days."
"This is a huge step forward in inclusivity for people named Justin Trudeau," Trudeau said solemnly at a press conference Tuesday afternoon. He wiped away tears as he spoke. "I can finally feel comfortable going into the bathroom and knowing I'll be able to take care of my hygienic needs, no matter what gender identity expression I've taken on for the day."
"We are inclusive. We are diverse. We are Canada - and we will not apologize," Trudeau said triumphantly while reporters cheered. "Well, we will apologize, but not for this."
At publishing time, Trudeau had just used the ladies' room like normal.
Congratulations to Canada, which now has tampons in the men's bathrooms on Parliament Hill
No freedom of the press in Canada.
Why do we trade with them?
https://twitter.com/stillgray/status/1744513151335620656
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