patrick.net

So, I've spent about fifteen years around the Boston area, and about the same here in the bay area. Overall, people in both places just want to mind their own business, live their life peacefully, and enjoy life. As with all large populations, there are a whole bunch of crazies too.

Around Boston, the crazies are in-your-face loudmouths who know better than you how you should live your life, and they'll tell you loudly and constantly, it's their way or none at all. "It's windy today" will result in "Why don't you grow a pair or get out if you can't handle it."

In the bay area, we're surrounded by fragile little multi-cultural liberal snowflakes who will find a way to take offense to anything you say, so you have to deal with them like you're walking on eggshells. "What a bright sunny day today!" will result in "what do you have against rainy days?"

Both places are nice in their own way, and both are infuriating. If you don't like it, you can indeed move :). The people who have chosen to live in San Francisco like it enough to put up with the local bullshit in order to live there, it is their choice. The only sad part is that the city is so anti-development that the less affluent people who want to live there can't anymore.

donjumpsuit says

I am from Massachusetts and have many thoughts on the matter.

First of all, people on the west coast, let's just say the SFBay, but it extends to the whole west coast, don't know how to express themselves in a honest and sincere way, and moreover, don't know how to deal with people who do.

There is too much massaging and ball cupping out here (not the gay kind either). In Boston, people are sincere. If they don't like you, you will know it, but it doesn't ruin your day.

The take home is that you know where you stand with almost everyone in Boston. Something that should make you sleep well at night

One of the reasons why I'd brought up MA bands like J Geils, The Cars, Aerosmith, Boston is that I know of at least one person, who're either friends or acquaintances with at least one or more of the local artists.

And as you've stated, we all know where one stands, so if Tom Scholz (of Boston) is playing hoops with one of my old pals or Joe Perry (of Aerosmith) is showing another friend how to play certain guitar licks, well, that says a lot. That's a total of one or two degrees of separation.

The eastern transplants in SFBA, at least the ones I know of, basically say that the area is a dead zone, in terms of authentic interpersonal ties and a sense of community. One of them did get into music and was somewhat successful but even his ties with other artists and performers, were tenuous at best. He's been talking about coming back in MA, during the past couple of years.

When I visited New Orleans a couple of years ago, I heard a lady from Boston describe her time living California.

She said it was a place where the animal rights activists kick the dog on the way out to the animal rights rally, and the same people who are claiming to be involved in liberal causes for the oppressed have no idea how to be civil and decent in interpersonal relations with their own neighbors.

She said she didn't like it at all, and I have to admit, she nailed a quality of California liberal righteousness that fits. Political correctness laced with interpersonal malice, just a battering ram to be an ASSHOLE.

Interesting the notation of east coast authenticity versus the west coast pose. Some SoCal curiosities I've noticed, having moved from NYC to LA 6 years ago: valet parking for hamburger joints; sunglasses worn indoors; nobody will drive more than a mile to meet friends, but they'll sit in traffic for 2 hours to go to work; being late is considered on time (if somebody is rude enough to call someone out for being late, "traffic" is always to be blamed); office hours are 10:30 to 4:30; everybody dresses like they are going to the playground when they are going to work, or like they are going grocery shopping when they are going out to dinner.

There's lots of other bizarrities here, but the interpersonal thing is the most corrosive. And last call at 1:30 is an affront to taste and decency.

The most pervasive, even socially acceptable thing, is the insincere "blowing smoke up your ass."

Californians will make five different sets of plans with five different sets of people, then at the last minute, pick the one they think is "best" and then beg off the rest.

Even "friends" do it to friends, adding an even greater layer of insincerity and mild betrayal to what should be small tests of loyalty, forthrightness, regard, ethics and bonding.

Philistine says

Some SoCal curiosities I've noticed, having moved from NYC to LA 6 years ago: valet parking for hamburger joints; sunglasses worn indoors; nobody will drive more than a mile to meet friends, but they'll sit in traffic for 2 hours to go to work;

I think the expression, Californication, is about the Lala land of SoCal and its delusional denizens. And thus, I think folks are prepared for that, when they venture into LA county.

On the other hand, SF was suppose to be something special, completely unlike SoCal.

Ceffer says

Even "friends" do it to friends, adding an even greater layer of insincerity and mild betrayal to what should be small tests of loyalty, forthrightness, regard, ethics and bonding.

The aforementioned musician in SF, the guy who's originally from MA, is thinking of moving back because even though he's only 35, he's worried about dying alone in SFBA, esp if his girlfriend and him don't settle down long term. He doesn't want to spend his middle years in a place where ppl don't really know how to make friends and keep 'em. Right now, he counts his transplanted high school/college pals in CA, as his only true friends in the region. From my perspective, that's almost like being a part of a diaspora than a part of America.

Well, I'm sad to think of the kinds of Californians you all have met. I'm a transplant, but your descriptions don't fit my experience in the many years I've been here. I immediately met incredible, genuine people who walk the talk. Good luck finding new friends! The ones you've made so far sound horrible!

I think they're mis-characterizing all Californians as those NIMBY busybodies and activist poseurs, just like they accuse Californians of mischaracterizing east coasters. The sort of people they talk about it are easily encountered in Berkeley, hipster enclaves of San Francisco, etc. Like I said before, most people are the good, friendly, caring sort and the fringe is what sullies the image.

myob says

Like I said before, most people are the good, friendly, caring sort and the fringe is what sullies the image.

Pretty much the same story everywhere in the world.

"“If you look for the bad in people expecting to find it, you surely will.” ~ AL

The Beach Boys (prior generation) and David Lee Roth (my childhood) endorsed California ...

http://www.youtube.com/embed/5GMoLENWsSk

rooemoore says

"“If you look for the bad in people expecting to find it, you surely will.”

Nah, that's cynical. I think a glib cliché is just as damaging as an overcritical eye.

One more tidbit on Boston music ... I know a cousin of the lead singer of this band.

They covered a song by a prior Boston act, The Cars, and the guest keyboardist is Greg Hawkes (of the original Cars), supporting them in this movie segment.

So while this is a track for a Hollywood movie, the roots of Boston rock are very tight knit here ...

http://www.youtube.com/embed/UmgBRYMFodk

I've been to Japan recently for many weeks, its tough there, but much cleaner and lower crime and a lot of work - but here in Berne Switzerland , very expensive to buy, but to live - you can LIVE here. 5 weeks vacation, respect for your time - employers respect you must go home at 5. Trains work and on time, schools good, learn many languages, food is awesome.

The USA is trash. Think of going from San Francisco to Guadalajara. That is a big difference, a big drop in standards into the 3rd world.

Well coming from Switzerland to Mexifornia and San Fran Sicko is the same horrible drop. The quality of life STINKS. And its sad to see the scam of the American dream-turned-police-state-nightmare be sold.

I am done with San Fran Sicko. The USA is in serious, serious decline. I recommend anyone who still lives in fantasy world visit Tokyo and Zurich so you can realize you live like animals in San Fran Sicko and the lame bay area. Horrible schools, horrible air quality, horrible commutes, horrible "regular" food.

I wish I didnt have to come back.