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I wonder if I’d get sued for some kind of copyright infringement if I used the dead wicked witch under her house.
Patrick
You can get a cartoonist to do a house with feet under it, without using an original still image, I guess. Cartoonists seem to be able to do anything...
t-shirts, coffee cups, green hemp shopping bags, sheesh -- let's change the world one coffee at a time...
THEY AREN'T MAKING MORE LAND
[ picture of a big medicine capsule or dizzy smiley face ]
BUT THEY'RE MAKING MORE PROZAC!
how about a tear-down ramshackle timber (out)house of approx 1 b.r. saying "EQUITY, BABY!"
One of the big 4 banks here had a series of ads a year ago saying 'equity, mate!' with a loudmouthed lebanese guy purchasing a boat and a car out of his house equity while his silly caucasian neighbour had NOTHING to show for all that HELOCability. :cry:
[front]: I made a million in Real Estate!
[back]: Problem is,
I started out with TWO million.
I wanted a T-Shirt, but all I could afford was a lousy house.
I lost a million in Real Estate!
Ask me how!
Wanted: Buyer “with a bucket of money and a box of stupidâ€!
Broke is the New Black
All your equity are belong to us.
This housing bust is different.
Sell now or be priced in forever.
They aren’t making any more buyers.
We are heading towards a permanently low plateau.
“It’s only when the tide goes out that you can see who’s been swimming naked.â€
–Warren Buffett
“When the shoe-shine guy gives you stock tips, it’s time to get out.â€
–Joseph Kennedy
“If you owe the bank $100, that’s your problem.
If you owe the bank $100 million, that’s the bank’s problem.â€
–J. Paul Getty
“History has not dealt kindly with the aftermath of protracted periods of low-risk premiums.â€
–Alan Greenspan
“Asset bubbles tend to last longer and grow larger than any rational person at the time would have thought possible.â€
–HARM
Bubblefucius say:
Man who carry risky loan sure
to suffer broken ARM.
Bubblefucius say:
Condo flipping like swift kick in the scrotum.
Both painful and you left holding the bag.
Bubblefucius say:
Low-ball offer today look much better tomorrow,
when you are on knees.
Bubblefucius say:
Housing comps like instant coffee;
both good until the last drop.
Wow! Look at that! Patrick has a free marketing team
Good idea. I like the way you think; reminds me of Tom Sawyer.:lol:
You know, it's about time for "howmuchamonth" to come back in vogue.
"Man, my house is losing equity again!"
"Really? Howmuchamonth?"
“South Florida,’’ he said, “is working off of a totally new economic model than any of us have ever experienced in the past†according to a realtor who predicted that a land shortage will support higher prices indefinitely.â€
–New York Times, Trading Places: Real Estate Instead of Dot-Coms, 3/25/05
“Homeownership has become a vehicle for borrowing and leveraging as much as a source of financial security.â€
–Former Fed Chairman Paul Volcker, Feb 11, 2005
“Friends don’t let friends buy overpriced housesâ€
–DinOR
“…capitalism without financial failure is not capitalism at all, but a kind of socialism for the richâ€.
–Jim Grant
“Democracy is an upside-down homeowner, a mortgage investor, and a tax-paying renter, voting on what’s for dinner.â€
–Home-A-Loan
"Monthly rent : 2k
Security deposit : 2.5k
Watching smug neighbors evicted by sherriff : Priceless"
How about just using one of those old mortgage ads, the full ad with the full graphics; you know, the ones that advertise
"1%"
"no money down"
"bad credit ok"
"bankruptcies no problem"
That should remind everyone about the dangers of easy credit.
You could put that on the back.
On the front you can just put a picture of a house with the text "Reduced".
Make the shirt 100% cotton so the house keeps getting smaller every time you wash it.
Eventually, you can give it to your kid to pass on the knowledge; not that the next generation will be as dumb, but you never know! :lol:
Here is one that targets the sellers with some practical advice:
"If at first you don't sell, reduce, reduce again."
Trust me. I'm a realtor.
He who dies with the most foreclosures wins!
ARMed and dangerous!
They don't make land any more. They don't make home loans any more either. Buy a Mortgage Broker.
Nice house. (Bwahahaha!)
How about:
"You mean my one bedroom bungalow with the sagging roof isn't worth $1M?"
[front]: I made a million in Real Estate!
[back]: Problem is,
I started out with TWO million.
How about...
My house is worth one million dollars...
But I bought it for two.
No, you stupid fucking boomer you can't get a prescription for "house viagra".
A picture of a house with an ATM on the side that reads:
"OVERDRAWN, NO FUNDS AVAILABLE"
"Balance -(minus) $275,000"
Fed injects 31.25 billion dollars into markets
WASHINGTON (AFP) — The Federal Reserve added 31.25 billion dollars in temporary reserves to the US money markets Thursday in three different operations, the latest move to keep credit markets from drying up.
The New York Fed added 7.0 billion dollars in 14-day repurchase agreements, 16 billion in seven-day repurchase agreements and 8.25 billion in one-day repos.
The Fed has injected some 200 billion dollars into the financial system since August 9 in a bid to boost credit flows which have seized up due to problems linked to the distressed US mortgage market.
The US central bank typically buys billions of dollars worth of securities from major banks, pumping extra cash into the banking system, which the banks are obliged to repurchase at a later date.
===============
Dollar Heads for Weekly Slide Versus Euro on Fed Rate Outlook
By David McIntyre and Ron Harui
Sept. 7 (Bloomberg) -- The dollar headed for a weekly decline against the euro and the yen on speculation the U.S. subprime-mortgage crisis will prompt the Federal Reserve to lower interest rates this month.
The currency traded near an one-week low versus the euro after Federal Deposit Insurance Corp. Chairman Sheila Bair said yesterday an additional 1.5 million borrowers with poor credit histories may miss payments. The yield advantage for holding U.S. two-year debt over similar-maturity German bunds narrowed to zero this week for the first time since September 2004.
``The dollar will be slightly weaker today,'' said Robert Rennie, chief currency strategist at Westpac Banking Corp. in Sydney. ``It's hard to see a lot of good news out there.''
The dollar was at $1.3683 per euro at 10:25 a.m. in Tokyo from $1.3691 late in New York yesterday, a decline of 0.4 percent this week. It reached $1.3709 yesterday, the weakest since Aug. 31. The U.S. currency traded at 115.37 yen, compared with 115.38 yen yesterday and 115.77 yen last week. The euro bought 157.88 yen.
Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson yesterday told PBS Television it may take a number of months to work out the strains in capital markets and ``there will be a penalty to our economic growth.'' Interest-rate futures show traders are betting with 100 percent certainty the Fed will cut its benchmark rate at least a quarter-percentage point to 5 percent on Sept. 18.
A sharp drop in foreign holdings of US Treasury bonds over the last five weeks has raised concerns that China is quietly withdrawing its funds from the United States, leaving the dollar increasingly vulnerable.
Data released by the New York Federal Reserve shows that foreign central banks have cut their stash of US Treasuries by $48bn since late July, with falls of $32bn in the last two weeks alone.
"This comes as a big surprise and it is definitely worrying," said Hans Redeker, currency chief at BNP Paribas.
"We won't know if China is behind this until the Treasury releases its TIC data in November, but what it does show is that world central banks are in a hurry to get out of the US. They don't seem to be switching into other currencies, so it is possible they are moving into gold instead. Gold is now gaining momentum across all currencies and has broken through resistance at 500 euros," he said.
Appraisal? $300
Inspection? $250
Title Insurance? $1500
Agent's Commission? $54000
Losing your home in foreclosure? PRICELESS
subprime express-it's everywhere you don't want to be!
I have enjoyed this blog for a while now, but this is the best of the best.
Keep it up!
T-shirt FRONT:
A picture of that floating house thingie on the cover of David Lereah's book, "Are You Missing the Real Estate Boom," except with caption:
"Are you missing the real estate BUST?"
T-shirt BACK:
"Well, I am. - Jealous Bitter Renter"
DinOR Says:
SP should have a field day with this one!
Okay, with that kind of pressure, I gotta come up wit something...
"Give us this day our daily HELOC."
"Oh lord, won't you get me, an interest rate cut?
My friends all got foreclosed, can't cover my nut.
My job pays peanuts, and my savings negative,
Oh lord, won't you please, make my bank forgive?"
"Real Estate is the last refuge of the looser (sic)."
"Got bubble?"
"There ain't no freude like Schadenfreude."
"Half the people in the world are above average. And the rest are in the Real Estate business."
"Realtor (tm) == Used Home Salesman"
"Pardon him, Theodotus: he is a realtor, and thinks that the myths of his tribe and island are the laws of economics." (obscure Cæsar reference)
A picture of the Schiller graph, captioned: "I rode the Schiller Chiller and all I got was a lousy notice of default."
"A man without a mortgage is like a fish without a bicycle."
"Rent. Don't throw your money away on a mortgage."
"Real Estate never goes down. Except when it crashes."
"Mortgage Backed Securities: Buy manure, expect smell."
A picture of Greenspan: "Chairman of The F'ed"
"What did Michael Jackson say to Alan Greenspan?
So, I heard you like to blow Bubbles too!"
A picture of Greenspan, captioned:
"Damn it feels good to be a Banksta
Now Banksta-ass niggas come in all shapes and colors
Some got killed in the past.
But this Banksta here was a smart one
Retired just in time for the bust!"
A picture of Casey Serin in a dunce cap, with one of the following slogans below:
"Foreclosure is what happens while you're busy making other plans."
"Today is the first day of the rest of my life. But so was yesterday, and look how I messed that up."
"Rich Dad, F*cked Dad"
"Poster Child"
"If I had to do this all over again, I would get more fire insurance."
"2005: Flip
2007: Flop"
"Broke is the new Black."
"Got Ramen?"
"My cash flow is negative, but I will make it up by volume."
A picture of David Lereah, simply captioned: "Liarreah"
A picture of Angelo Mozilo, captioned: "Age and Treachery Will Always Overcome Youth and Skill."
Pictures of Lereah, Greenspan, Cramer and ??? with the caption:
"When the experts all agree, they may well be mistaken."
Pictures of Trump, Kiyosaki, ??? and ??? with the caption:
"Thou shalt not worship false gods. Or complete idiots."
Picture of Greenspan with the caption:
"My job is like a plumber. If you do your job right, nobody knows. So you screw things up, and then retire before everyone gets covered in shit."
SP
Oh, almost forgot:
"Realtors (tm) - 6% commission, 100% bullshit."
I would buy a few of these to wear to open houses in 2008.
SP
"They aren't making any more fools. Sell now before you get priced in."
SP
They aren’t making any more fools.
Want to bet about that? :)
Sheeple are being herded away though.
Star Wars references:
"I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to low-ball you."
“Aren’t you a little broke for an 'RE mogul'?â€
“Mos Eisley Realty. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.â€
“I find your lack of equity disturbing.â€
Picture of Bernanke: "Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope.â€
"Beware, Viceroy. The Fed has gone too far this time."
"Mesa called Jar Jar Binks, mesa new Realtor (tm) !"
"Twice the debt, double the fall."
"Use the Spin, Lereah. The Spin will be with you, always."
"Oh, great borrower, hmm? Debt does not make one rich."
"(Anakin) Liquidity Crisis ahead.
(Obi-wan) Wait a minute, how'd this happen? We're smarter than this.
(Anakin) Apparently not.
Other movie references:
"Dude, where's my equity?"
"My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my comps."
SP
"Rich Dad, F*cked Dad" LOL!
See! See! Did I tell you, or what!
Buy 'em, collect 'em, trade 'em! Patrick.net. Your "One Stop Shop" for tormenting FB's!
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I've opened a patrick.net store at http://www.cafepress.com/patrick_net. I'm looking for pithy slogans (and logos, for the artistically inclined) that I can put on stuff like t-shirts and coffee cups.
Examples:
All Your Equity Are Belong To Us
Your Tax Dollars Pay My Mortgage
Heads I Win, Tails You Bail Me Out
Patrick
#housing