patrick.net

So two Ho walk into an abortion clinic...

...and then the Horse says, is that a clothes hanger or are you just happy to see me?

Thank you I'll be here all night, don't forget to tip your community organizer.

Abortion: So your unwanted baby doesn't turn into a wanted adult who stabs my wanted baby over $10 for crack.

If you kill a pregnant woman, regardless of stage or term, you'll be charged with two murders.

Vicente says

Abortion has to be made funny, the thinking goes, because funny sells on social media, and that’s where one goes to court young people.

As a Conservative (who is no fan of the GOP) this line of thinking makes my blood boil.

Every single time we hit a "reset" moment the old guard loads up on consultants (and flyover state college Repubs) to push the messaging directly into the media-run wood chipper.

Boasting of your plan(s) without research, development and significant testing is like telling the neighborhood bully that you'll be in the park at 3pm, alone and loaded up with birthday money.

So basically you're saying the GOP aint got nothing.
They don't have any funny people to pull it off.
They had Denis Miller but he grew up, and let's be honest, there's not any thing funny about a middle aged republican.

It reminds me of Oh Brother Where art thou, when Papa Odel's son tells him...
"Well maybe we need to git us one of them midgets with a broom, so's we can sweep out the incumbents..."

to which he said...

"You dumb son of bitch we is the incumbents"

CaptainShuddup says

So basically you're saying the GOP aint got nothing.

Pretty much. Anyone who can grasp (and execute) the marketing concepts needed to win over the middle-of-the-road populace was alienated a long, long time ago. They might agree with most of the GOP platform, but they'd never be asked to the dance.

sbh says

So many of us yearn for a Republican to vote for, but the party will forever save us the trouble

Well you will always have your "N" word.

sbh says

Stand up for yourself. Say "nigger". You know you want to.

CaptainShuddup says

They had Denis Miller but he grew up, and let's be honest, there's not any thing funny about a middle aged republican.

This guy is still hilarious:

He's as much republican as Obama is a Mississippi delta blues man.
I know he says he is on Comedy Central but it's passive aggressive humor. Conservative mockery with a Liberal slant.

Vicente says

Big GOP Plan: Abortion Humor to rope in youngsters

That is the worst idea from the GOP since the last idea from the GOP.

sbh says

they can only offer up their fiscal conservatism

Or their unearned reputation for such.

CaptainShuddup says

there's not any thing funny about a middle aged republican.

OK Colbert was a joke.

But when I was Republican (30+ years!) I liked this guy:

I want to like PJ more than I really do. He kind of just squints and mumbles right-wing rhetoric nowadays. And not very convincingly!

I can't wait to sample some of that abortion "humor". Nothing tickles my ribs like good ol' amerikkkan abortion humor.

Vicente says

This guy is still hilarious:

I gotta say...I think he's actually gotten better with time.

(BTW the above image is not even remotely comedic for a lot of folks I know and work with. If anything, they're mad he thought of it first.)

I don't know about the passive aggressiveness...it's just satire, and sometimes satire is truly the only lens through which looking at life on this planet becomes bearable.

Is it really that difficult to use protection so as not to end up in a situation where abortion even needs to be contemplated? Pendejos/jas!

CaptainShuddup says

I know he says he is on Comedy Central but it's passive aggressive humor. Conservative mockery with a Liberal slant.

Thanks for breaking that down for us Einstein.

sbh says

This is the GOP's problem in a nutshell. It harbors the nuts in the party platform. They're at it again as we speak with yet another abortion bill that has no hope. My Republican friends have to hold their noses to vote;

They need the Baps of the world to win elections and hence they are doomed.

This is a moderate right country. But their party is dominated by an odd combination of corporate and plutocrat money, combined with the huge evangelical fundamentalist christian segment of the population. Good people in many cases, but ignorant and very gullible.

Moderate Infidel says

I can't wait to sample some of that abortion "humor".

RING RING!

Hello!

Bob's Abortion Clinic, you rape 'em, we scrape 'em!

Ouch.

I don't think abortion humor is possible, but what they probably are thinking of is mocking those who think abortion is okay, on facebook etc., in much the same way that the religious are often mocked as morons on various websites where psuedo intellectual teenagers go to feel superior to the stupid religious folk.

Which by the way, in my view not much better than the hillbillies using their fundamentalist faith to feel morally superior to those who are in fact (at least in some ways) intellectually superior.

In other words the division widens. And we know who wins then.

sbh says

if you put a gun to my head I would choose them hands down in a heartbeat as a model for us all to follow in life. They don't want nuthin' from nobody; they are productive throughout persistent adversity; they take care of their own.

I bet you're a big Delmer Daves fan.

http://www.youtube.com/embed/nkXDLNRVMxY

I lived with my uncle in Alpine off and on for two years between '53 and '54...my happiest memories are from then.

dublin hillz says

Is it really that difficult to use protection so as not to end up in a situation where abortion even needs to be contemplated? Pendejos/jas!

Yes.

Condoms being 98% effective implies (.98 ^ 365 probability) that a young randy couple having sex every day are just 0.063% likely to avoid pregnancy each year.

drew_eckhardt says

implies (.98 ^ 365 probability)

Flawed premise. It presupposes equal fertility on all 365 days. It also presupposes "properly used" condom. Real world effectiveness is rather lower than 98%.

marcus says

Which by the way, in my view not much better than the hillbillies using their fundamentalist faith to feel morally superior to those who are in fact (at least in some ways) intellectually superior.

How about survivalist who make their gentry guest on the deserted island polish the Tchotchke for food.

CaptainShuddup says

How about survivalist who make their gentry guest on the deserted island polish the Tchotchke for food.

Island guests are supposed to be playing The Most Dangerous Game