patrick.net

"He stated that the United States could discover and produce enough oil in 2012 to cause a worldwide oil price collapse."

I've been hearing that for about two weeks now, every time the unexplained rallying Oil comes up, while we're taking on millions of gallons over supply of gas and Oil week over week.
Yesterday OPEC said if not for speculators Oil would be at least $30 cheaper.

Newt is plenty smart. The word you are searching for is immoral. The man is a total snake. Doesn't anyone remember that while he was in the house Newt pretty much originated and fostered the nasty personal attack politics that is the hallmark of the modern Republican party? The type of politics that he now denounces. Even by current political standards Newt sets new lows in being a hypocrite and liar.

I love this Fat Bastard. He will put children to work, expel dark skinned invaders, eliminate taxes I don't pay anyway, and unleash a firestorm of death and profits in the Arab and Persian lands.

If this man can accomplish half of what he promises, it may be the best shot in the arm the underclass needs to shut the fuck up and return to servile prostration.

Voice over: Meanwhile, King Arthur and Bedevere, not more than a swallow's
flight away, had discovered something.

Knights of Newt: Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt!
Arthur: Who are you?
Knight of Newt: We are the Knights who say..... "Newt"!
Arthur: (horrified) No! Not the Knights who say "Newt"!
Knight of Newt: The same.
Other Knight of Newt: Who are we?
Knight of Newt: We are the keepers of the sacred words: Newt, Ping, and Newt-womm!
Other Knight of Newt: Newt-womm!
Arthur: (to Bedevere) Those who hear them seldom live to tell the tale!
Knight of Newt: The knights who say "Newt" demand..... a sacrifice!
Arthur: Knights of Newt, we are but simple travelers who seek the enchanter who
lives beyond these woods.
Knights of Newt: Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt! Newt!
Bedevere: No! Noooo! Aaaugh! No!
Knight of Newt: We shall say "Newt" to you... if you do not appease us.
Arthur: Well what is it you want?
Knight of Newt: We want.....

(pregnant pause)

A SHRUBBERY!!!!
(dramatic minor chord)
Arthur: A *WHAT*?
Knights of Newt: Newt! Newt!! Newt! Newt!
Arthur; No! No! Please, please, no more! We will find you a shrubbery.
Knight of Newt: You must return here with a shrubbery... or else you will never
pass through this wood... alive.
Arthur: O Knights of Newt, you are just and fair, and we will return with a
shrubbery.
Knight of Newt: One that looks nice.
Arthur: Of course!
Knight of Newt: And not *too* expensive.
Arthur; Yes!
Knight of Newt: Noowwwww.... GO!

(music)

Arthur: O Knights of Newt. We have brought you your shrubbery. May we go now?
Knight of Newt: Yes, it is a good shrubbery. I like the laurels particularly.
But there is one small problem....
Arthur: What is that?
Knight of Newt: We are now *no longer* the Knights Who Say "Newt"!
Other Knights of Newt: Newt! Shh! Shh!
Knight of Newt: We are now the Knights who say "Ekky-ekky-ekky-ekky-z'Bang,
zoom-Boing, z'nourrrwringmm".
Other Knight of Newt: Newt!
Knight of Newt: Therefore, we must give you a test.
Arthur: What is this test, o Knights of.....
Knights who 'til recently said "Newt"?
Knight of Newt: Firstly, you must find....

ANOTHER SHRUBBERY!!!
(another minor chord)
Arthur: Oh not *another* shrubbery!!
Knight of Newt: (excitedly) THEN... Then, when you have found the shrubbery,
you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly
higher, so we get the two-level effect with a little path
running down the middle.
Other Knights of Newt: A path! A path! A path! Shh, shhh. Newt! Newt!
Knight of Newt: Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must cut down the
mightiest tree in the forest...
Wiiiiiithh.... A Red HERRING!