patrick.net

haha... nice post.

Ya'll are missing the point, I think...

Why would the CDC deny existence of zombies unless there's a serious ongoing problem with them? Did anyone else notice that it was the Centers for Disease Control that issued the denial of apocolyptic zombies, rather than Homeland Security, the CIA or the FBI?

Zombies most certainly aren't diseases - although I'm sure that infections are spread while the undead consume the flesh of innocent victims. Zombie-associated infections are not an issue, though, because as the victims' flesh rots the victims will be focused on filming their last moments and posting it to fb/twitter.

But I would submit that the CDC denial was actually issued by another agency - a shadow agency that wishes to remain in the background and manipulate the media without presenting itself... a long-forgotten agency that still receives funding but is quietly gathering power until one day it will "rise up" and present its agenda to the world...

...it's a zombie agency!

Zombie agencies, zombie banks, zombies, oh my.

Damn, somebody already bought zombiebook.com. I thought I could get rich off of zombie networking.

Ah, but is zombiebookie.com taken too? You could write the book on the subject and then take votes on it.

On the local TV news they were blaming all this cannibalism on drug usage (specifically "bath salts"). For some reason the high price of food was never mentioned???

YesYNot says

I cannot believe that no one has commented about the start of cannibal anarchy!

I don't know about you guys, but I've been stocking up on Zombie bullets. Get yours now! The zombie apocalypse is gonna be here sooner than anyone thinks!

zzyzzx says

On the local TV news they were blaming all this cannibalism on drug usage (specifically "bath salts")

"Bath Salts" is the new Twinkie Defense?

tdeloco says

"Bath Salts" is the new Twinkie Defense?

Bath salts are called that because they had to be called something. They're anything but bath salts.

If they were to simply legalize pot alot of these problems would go away. People would be too stoned to do anything.

All the banks are zombies WORLDWIDE.
All the undawata loanowners are zombies WORLDWIDE.

How can the CDC deny this??!!??!!

I've been holding back because it's too easy...

I think the CDC may have categorized being a Zombie as a "lifestyle".

Funny South Park clip:
http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/155590/i-dont-have-change

http://www.xrOek4z32Vg

This is actually a small group of people. In a very large populace so don't worry lol

ArtimusMaxtor says

This is actually a small group of people.

I feel like I've just been Rick Rolled after watching that video.

Man Arrested For Eating 2-Day-Old Baby
http://live.huffingtonpost.com/r/archive/segment/man-arrested-for-eating-2-day-old-baby/534d649afe3444833c0000c8?cn=tbla

http://www.nbcnews.com/science/weird-science/zombie-apocalypse-nigh-pentagon-ready-report-n105671

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

PockyClipsNow says

How can the CDC deny this??!!??!!

CDC warned about the Zombie pandemic three years ago:

APOCALYPSEFUCKisShostikovitch says

CHECK IT OUT:

The Zombie Bible!

http://zombie.stinque.com/bible/Main_Page

Thanks guy finally something I can believe in. I lived near the CDC and can remember when Carter invoked it in lets see 19hunderd ot 78 or 9 or so. There were zombies in Atlanta back then. Looks like that "zombie bible" has gone threw some revisions.