patrick.net

Really well done!

As the sign suggests..... we offer for sale, our wonderful, cozy, slightly-retro bungalow located just a stones throw from the heart of Portland, in Beaverton, Oregon.

We did everything right. Married ten years. Two kids: one perfect boy, one bouncy, perfect baby girl. We had almost no debt outside of our cars and we bought a house.... but, as with many marriages, our story ends in divorce. I'm not sure how this all happened... but, all I can is that as soon as your husband/wife starts using new texts languages like :/, or starts talking to you like a college kid.... check your phone bill - you're probably going to be in for a surprise. For me that surprise came in the form of a 22 year old college student who likes yoga... and, other people's husbands.

Well, I liked him too .... and I'm sure one day I'll like him again. lol - So, I guess I can't blame her too much, right?

This whole thing happened so fast (started in March, 2012), and while it has been the darkest hours of my life so far, it has also been filled with wonderful friends, neighbors and family who have helped in so many ways. It's the death of my marriage and the family I had as I knew it... but, that's all. I know that sounds crazy, but at some point you have to put the brakes on and realize that worse things are happening to someone else right now as you're reading this. As my wise Grandmother always say's, "Jews in Auschwitz would love to have your problems....". And she's right (aren't Grandma's always right?). This isn't the worse that could happen to me. Sure I'm angry, and every bit as sad as the sign suggests... but I'm also equally grateful for the life I do have and I know that the best the way to more forward for all of us is to focus on that. Hence my quirky marketing For Sale By Owner plan. :)

I wonder though when the NAR is going to send her a cease and desist for not using the ® after Realtor®.

Realtor Type Facts

Beds: 3
Baths: 1
Sqft: 1,144*
...

I could use some tips about how to bag a 22 yo.

Apparently you should take a yoga class!

At my age the only way I'm hooking up with a 22 year old girl is with Chloroform and duct tape. :)

Techie,
You ought to be very careful about sharing such thoughts you have on the internet.

TechGromit says

At my age the only way I'm hooking up with a 22 year old girl is with Chloroform and duct tape. :)

If I was single I don't think I would want to date the type of person who would date someone almost twice their age.

Really well done!

I'd say that the husband did pretty well.

Yoga class! of course!

But how not to pass gas during the relaxation? Thats a deal killer right there.

PockyClipsNow says

But how not to pass gas during the relaxation?

Fart filtering underwear:

http://www.myshreddies.com/flatulence-incontinence-underwear/c/11/mens-flatulence-filtering-underwear/

Yes, I've heard that yoga classes are very farty, not only because of the positions, but also because the class is filled with vegetarian bean and lentil-eating types.

Good to know there is a technological solution. Should be required attire.

Lucky guy :)

B.A.C.A.H. says

Techie,
You ought to be very careful about sharing such thoughts you have on the internet.

You're kinda new to the whole internet thing and how it works exactly, aren't you ;)

1. Sign up for Yoga class
2. Don the 'NoFartyPants' pants.
3. Bag a 22 yo!

THANK YOU EVERYONE!

You should probably be thin and good looking too.

/sorry to burst your bubble

Also its probaby best to shut the eff up about RE, the fed reserve, and intrest rates around a 22 yo.

(yet another tip!)

CrazyMan says

You should probably be thin and good looking too.

That can easily be replaced by simply being rich.

Well, I guess he does look thin...

Indeed, rich works too.

I know this is morbid, but when she died I remembered thinking to myself "well, she finally got her wish to be thin".

And they lived happily ever after!

I admire Anna Nicole Smith. She knew exactly what she was doing.

And I've heard that J. Howard Marshall died laughing, because he knew what he was doing too. He just wanted to piss off the family members that were hungrily waiting for their inheritance.

I stopped clicking like. I enjoyed all the comments.

Size: 1,144 sq. ft.
Built: 1949
Lot Size: 0.17 acres
Taxes: $2,108.00/yr
Location: Oregon
Price: $169,000

I'd rather have the 22-year-old co-ed.

Size: 36C
Built: 1990
Butt Size: petite
Downside: Like the house, she's a rapidly depreciating asset. Best to rent.

PockyClipsNow says

I could use some tips about how to bag a 22 yo.

Apparently you should take a yoga class!

Oh, yoga! I've been taking Yoda classes.

http://www.youtube.com/embed/M403RsjXwRk

robertoaribas says

I love Yoga.

Has doing the yoga thing worked for you yet? How many 22 year olds have you bagged so far from yoga?

leoj707 says

If I was single I don't think I would want to date the type of person who would date someone almost twice their age.