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Obama jokes like an Asshole


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2014 Oct 21, 5:23am   8,184 views  53 comments

by Tenpoundbass   ➕follow (9)   💰tip   ignore  

http://www.cnn.com/2014/10/21/politics/obama-early-voting-jokes/index.html?hpt=hp_c2

Washington (CNN) -- Even the President of the United States has to deal with jealous boyfriends.
Casting his ballot in Chicago on Monday, Obama stood at a voting booth next to Aia Cooper, whose fiancé, Mike Jones, decided to crack wise with the president.
"Mr. President, don't touch my girlfriend," Jones quipped as he walked by the two.
"I really wasn't planning on it," Obama replied, joking that Jones was "an example of a brother just embarrassing you for no reason."
A clearly embarrassed Cooper apologized for her boyfriend, telling the President she knew her boyfriend was going to "say something smart," but she didn't know what.
At least she would go back home with a good story as Obama joked that she would tell her friends and family, "I can't believe Mike, he is such a fool."
"But fortunately, the President was nice about it, so it's alright," Obama said, imagining how Cooper would tell the story.
Obama got back at Jones after voting, with a hug and a kiss for his fiancé.
"On the cheek, just the cheek -- please, Michelle, don't come after me -- just the cheek!" Cooper told CNN affiliate WLS-TV after voting.
"Now, he's really jealous," Obama told Cooper.

Very regal Mr. President, in a ghetto ass way...

The proper response would have been to fire your security detail, not get in a petty squabble with your voting base, then sit there and stew like punk ass bitch.

#politics

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33   humanity   2014 Oct 21, 10:43am  

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Osama_bin_Laden_death_conspiracy_theories

My personal favorite of all the conspiracy theories or sub-theories:

that the announcement of bin Laden's death was timed to conflict with and take Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice off the air, to punish Trump for publicly questioning the authenticity of Barack Obama's birth certificate.

34   humanity   2014 Oct 21, 10:49am  

If you believe in conspiracies, here's a question for you.

If it was a hoax, how many of those people in the famous war room picture would have to know that ? Would Obama have to know ? Maybe the CIA or some black ops group was rogue on the entire thing. Giving the President, the VP, the head of the CIA, HIlary and key military leaders plausable deniability.

Then again, maybe it was all real.

http://www.politico.com/blogs/under-the-radar/2013/02/cia-finds-seven-more-photos-of-dead-bin-laden-157185.html

35   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 21, 11:18am  

They found photos?

Was he eating at a Chipolte?

36   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 21, 11:27am  

I was living on the Lam
in fear for my life from uncle sam
I was in Pakistan watching a show about a funny man

He was the first black president
read from a teleprompter with arrogance
lost his popularity couldn't get love for charity

Bang bang Obama shot me dead

Landed two black hawk war machines
damn near made shit my jeans
I was watching a show about a guillotine,

heard a flash and bang
Then a loud bell sound rang
my fucking face left my brain

bang bang Obama shot me dead

They mopped my up and put me in a bag
I heard one call me a Hodgie Fag
Went back to the chopper and threw me in the back

I was in a bloody mess
brains and blood where was my face
The turned a sharp left and dumped me in the sea

Bang bang!
my baby shot me
Bang bang!
my baby got me
Bang bang...

Obama shot me dead....

and you guys are hopeless romantics.

37   marcus   2014 Oct 21, 1:24pm  

CaptainShuddup says

Obama jokes like an Asshole

I would think that you would respect Obama for behaving like you do.

38   Y   2014 Oct 21, 1:32pm  

and you only had to have an IQ of about 59 to pass a comprehensive nationwide medical insurance bill before flipping a page and reading it.

humanity says

You only had to have an IQ of about 60 to realize that that would be a great way to bomb your enemies back to the stone age,

39   Y   2014 Oct 21, 1:33pm  

8tracks don't count...

humanity says

But he put out a lot of audio tapes.

40   marcus   2014 Oct 21, 1:34pm  

I see someone is still peddling worn out lies from 2009. Can't you find some brand new shiny 2014 lies to sell us ?

41   Y   2014 Oct 21, 1:35pm  

I heard he had planters for awhile...

humanity says

Maybe that was his son that we took out in Pakistan. Maybe Bin Laden was very ill, and not wnating to mave around a lot, which would have been a reason for him to keep a low profile.

42   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 21, 1:42pm  

marcus says

I see someone is still peddling worn out lies from 2009. Can't you find some brand new shiny 2014 lies to sell us ?

My credibility has held up better than Obama's has since 2009.

See folks Marcus remembers, you remember, I didn't just read this in the funny papers I said this when it went down.

Who was that guy, probably the guy that we killed that pissed the guy off that called the first guy that started putting together ISIS. That's Who.

That's probably why Obama don't want to fuck with them to much. Like one of those Crazy bitches you fucked, and you just ignore them when you bump into them around your wife. You just hope the bitch doesn't say something stupid and you just wish she'd go away. But you definitely don't want to provoke her in anyway. She could ask you to hit your self and you would.

"You Bastard you killed Omar Jahaffar"

43   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 23, 9:16am  

My credibility is Like a ROCK!

The Obama administration is claiming executive privilege over more than 15,000 documents related to Operation Fast and Furious, including correspondence between Attorney General Eric Holder and his wife, according to records received Wednesday night by the watchdog group Judicial Watch.

Last month, a federal judge ordered the Justice Department to release to Judicial Watch the list of documents, known as a “Vaughn index,” that it is withholding from the public, calling its requests for further delays “unconvincing.”

The 1,307-page Vaughn index lists 15,662 documents related to Operation Fast and Furious that the Obama administration is asserting executive privilege over—the first time that full list and description of the records has been released.

According to Judicial Watch, the withheld documents include communications between top officials at the Justice Department and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms (ATF), as well as with the United States Ambassador to Mexico.

The Obama administration is also asserting executive privilege over nearly 20 emails between Holder and his wife Sharon Malone.

You keep believing the fairy tales and comedy skits he keeps selling you Suckers.

44   marcus   2014 Oct 23, 12:32pm  

CaptainShuddup says

My credibility is Like a ROCK!

Sinking fast in the lake we call patrick.net.

45   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 23, 12:37pm  

I've never told a lie here but I've been called a liar, yelled at and told Bush was liar as well. Obama hasn't told one single truth since he took office.

I only wish it was 2016 already. I think Ronald Reagan's corpse would win over any Democrat offering. And that would be a Zombie with Alzheimer.

46   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 23, 1:05pm  

Welp you got me on technicality, I should just say what you read and not what I mean. Would that make it easier for you?

47   Y   2014 Oct 23, 1:35pm  

Actually, you have him on a technicality....

CaptainShuddup says

Welp you got me on technicality,

Apparently, neither are you.
A L.I.E. is when you say something as if it were true, when you know it is not true.

marcus says

Apparently you're not real clear on what lying means. When you're talking, if you say something that's not true, thet's called a L I E.

48   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 23, 1:42pm  

Look I don't care how you guys say it, Obama chopped down the damn Cherry tree and blamed Bush.

49   marcus   2014 Oct 23, 2:07pm  

SoftShell says

Apparently, neither are you.

A L.I.E. is when you say something as if it were true, when you know it is not true.

marcus says

Apparently you're not real clear on what lying means. When you're talking, if you say something that's not true, thet's called a L I E.

Wrong. I really do not believe he knows what lying is. I hear right wingers lying like crazy all the time. An example would be the birther nonsense. It's not about thinking it's true. It's about the fact that maybe some of the republicans core retards or racists might buy it. Maybe it will catch on and as a negative against Obama. That's what's important to you dimbulb liars. It's fun. HE wore a tan summer suit today, can you believe that ! Let's see if that sticks ! Weeeeee.

50   Y   2014 Oct 23, 2:10pm  

sounds more like propaganda....

marcus says

It's not about thinking it's true. It's about the fact that maybe some of the republicans core retards or racists might buy it.

51   marcus   2014 Oct 23, 10:53pm  

CaptainShuddup says

Look I don't care how you guys say it, Obama chopped down the damn Cherry tree and blamed Bush.

So you're saying that historically speaking, for a lot of people he'll be right up there with George Washington ?

52   Tenpoundbass   2014 Oct 23, 10:57pm  

No I'm saying he surpassed G.W. Bush for his name being synonymous with Lying.

53   HEY YOU   2014 Oct 24, 2:01am  

G.H.W. Bush: Read my lips,no new taxes.
G.W. Bush: Iraq has WMD.

I'm sure they simply misspoke.

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