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Political Humor Thread


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2019 Feb 17, 4:30pm   3,074,778 views  41,377 comments

by Patrick   ➕follow (60)   💰tip   ignore  

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8531   Patrick   2021 Mar 14, 6:47pm  

You were in a band?
8532   mell   2021 Mar 14, 7:22pm  

Patrick says
You were in a band?


Just school and student cover bands. The school band was Metallica, Pantera, Slayer, beastie boys, zz top and such, not particularly talented but loud and fun! We had a pretty Irish girl named Gaelle briefly who sung zombie by the cranberries very beautifully (I think she was also in a choir), made up for our lack of seriousness ;) The student band was more moderate stuff, a mix of covers from dire straits to Neil Young, ugly kid Joe, cameo, Doobie bros, nirvana, radiohead, oasis etc. Good times. There was a competing school band with much more talent who covered police etc., but they were mostly uncared for since we were the rebels and the punks went moshing nuts so that the janitor was instructed to cut off our power when the teachers had enough of us. We also rented a truck one night during a graduation party on the woods in the pouring rain and stayed under the cover until later that night when everyone was boozed up then they suddenly pulled the cover, turned the lights on and we opened with a brutally loud Marshall infused salvo of Slayer's skeletons of society. Beer bottles flew everywhere and there was an instant mosh pit in the rain. Shit like that would be impossible to pull off today.
8533   mell   2021 Mar 14, 7:27pm  

I will say one of the best songs to play live is Metallica's For whom the bell tolls. The guitar riffs are made for live shredding and the drummer can go apeshit on the drum break in between the verse lines (when vocals, guitars and base completely pull back).
8535   AmericanKulak   2021 Mar 14, 9:48pm  

Ha! MTV's old "theme" song now can't be played on that channel because of Dire Straits lyrics.
8536   Patrick   2021 Mar 14, 9:58pm  

Easiest arrest ever!

(quoting Scott Adams there)
8537   Patrick   2021 Mar 14, 11:15pm  

This is perfect! They want to ban Pepe Le Pew for his handsiness with women?

Lol, Biden is the real thing. Why don't they ban him?

8544   Patrick   2021 Mar 15, 1:31pm  

I like that guy!
8546   Patrick   2021 Mar 15, 11:52pm  

Scott Adams expects to be excluded from Twitter soon, so he wrote his apology in advance.


8547   Ceffer   2021 Mar 16, 1:02am  

I can see Scott is fully prepared to avoid unnecessary beatings in the Gulags.
8548   Patrick   2021 Mar 16, 11:31am  

https://reclaimthenet.org/conservative-councillor-suspended-for-post-dressed-as-a-woman/

Conservative councillor suspended for post dressed as a woman to mock idea of curfew against men

Mark Deacon, a conservative councillor in the UK, has been suspended from his role for posting an image of him wearing a dress in protest of the idea of a 6PM curfew on men following the murder of Sarah Everard. The councillor faced backlash for being “insensitive” to violence against women.

On Sunday, Deacon posted a picture of himself in a long black wig and floral pink dress. He said he would dress like that if a 6PM curfew against men was imposed.



8552   Patrick   2021 Mar 17, 9:54am  

U.S.—There is a long-successful narrative about race in this country: Racism of the past has led to structural racism, which keeps minorities from being successful. It seems really, really true, but one group continually causes problems for that narrative: Asians.

Asians in the U.S. have faced terrible discrimination in the past and continue to face discrimination today, and yet they continue to do even better academically and financially than white people -- the bad race that oppresses everyone. Woke activists are trying to put an end to this with a campaign urging Asians to be less successful so the simple racial narrative can prevail.

“It’s really inconsiderate,” said activist Howard Morrison, a white person who prides himself on caring more about racial issues than even most minorities. “No minority is supposed to be able to succeed until all white people learn to check their privilege. If minorities are successful anyway, it gets harder to guilt white people and just makes things more difficult for everyone.”

The new campaign is called, “You’re Not Allowed to Succeed Yet.” It’s specifically aimed at Asians but also applies to any minority doing well before structural racism is ended. The campaign has a phone number to report any successful minority, who will then be educated on how important it is that minorities wait for white people to fix things before any of them do well. A number of top universities have already signed on to the campaign and are helping out by limiting the number of Asians they admit.


https://babylonbee.com/news/asians-asked-to-be-less-successful-to-stop-ruining-racial-narrative
8555   Patrick   2021 Mar 18, 8:08am  

Unions were always famously corrupt. This seems to be proof.
8559   richwicks   2021 Mar 18, 6:34pm  

Patrick says
https://reclaimthenet.org/conservative-councillor-suspended-for-post-dressed-as-a-woman/

Conservative councillor suspended for post dressed as a woman to mock idea of curfew against men

Mark Deacon, a conservative councillor in the UK, has been suspended from his role for posting an image of him wearing a dress in protest of the idea of a 6PM curfew on men following the murder of Sarah Everard. The councillor faced backlash for being “insensitive” to violence against women.

On Sunday, Deacon posted a picture of himself in a long black wig and floral pink dress. He said he would dress like that if a 6PM curfew against men was imposed.





Makes a better looking woman than Rachael Levine.
8560   Tenpoundbass   2021 Mar 18, 8:05pm  

Though not really funny is it?


8561   SoTex   2021 Mar 18, 10:16pm  

Tenpoundbass says
Though not really funny is it?


Not even a little bit.
8567   Tenpoundbass   2021 Mar 19, 2:07pm  

WITH AUDIO


8569   Patrick   2021 Mar 19, 10:46pm  

8570   Patrick   2021 Mar 20, 9:36am  



BEIJING—The Chinese military has announced that they will no longer be investing in weapons, tanks, aircraft, or traditional warfare training techniques. Instead, the People's Liberation Army will simply be trained to shout the wrong pronouns at U.S. soldiers, who will collapse and shake uncontrollably at the advanced maneuver.

"Brave soldiers of the People's Liberation Army, prepare to launch a pronoun assault!" cried one platoon leader in a training exercise. "Go!"

The Chinese soldiers then began shouting "He/Him!" and "She/Her!" at American soldiers, whom Biden had loaned to the Chinese government for the practice session. They immediately collapsed to the floor. "No!!! I'm a xe/xer; it says so right on my dog tags!" cried one weeping American soldier huddled in the corner in the fetal position, rocking back and forth. "You can't call me the wrong pronoun -- it's literally violence! It's against the Geneva Convention!"

"President Biden will be hearing about this!" he shouted as he ran away.

"See? That's all we need to do to defeat the puny American soldiers," said the sergeant. "We don't even need to fire a shot. We just need to say the mean words they don't like."

A recent computer simulation predicted that using this tactic, the Chinese military would defeat America in approximately seven minutes.

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