Dark Blue States have Hardcore Leftoids. Dark Red States...

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2024 Feb 8, 8:21pm   123 views  2 comments

by AmericanKulak   ➕follow (9)   💰tip   ignore  

How come we are always so grievously disappointed by red state Republicans? You would think these guys would be the hardest of the hard, but instead, they are softer than Chris Christie’s gut. It’s obnoxious. They should be the best, but they’re often the worst. Squishy. Craven. Dumb. Come election year, they are Ripley in “Aliens;” the rest of the time they are Burke.

We’re not talking about Susan Collins here. Maine is a blue state, so she’s the best we are ever going to do. You can’t hold her being a moderate against her because she doesn’t pretend to be anything else. No, I’m talking about the guys from the manly red states. I’m talking about guys who should be channeling Godzilla and instead channel Barney the Dinosaur.

Take Senator Jim Lankford – that’s James to you, peasants! Take him, please! He’s from Oklahoma, so he should be so right-wing he makes Genghis Khan look like a San Francisco pinko pervert. But no. Given the chance to negotiate immigration reform – a proper reform would consist simply of us shutting the border and deporting all illegals – Jimmy rolled over for Chuck Schumer and agreed to the most embarrassingly bad deal since a bunch of Dutch sharpies ripped off the local indigenous peoples by buying Manhattan for 20 bucks worth of beads and some smallpox-laden blankets.

Now, by many measures, Jimmy is a hard-core conservative. Donald Trump endorsed him. He’s pro-America. He likes freedom, within corporately-defined limits, of course. He thinks we have a right to guns, probably. But then again, he also abased himself for correctly questioning the questionable 2020 election results. Pathetic. He’s hard, in the sense that butter is hard when you take it out of the fridge, but when you apply a little heat, it melts into a bubbling puddle of goo.

Jimmy is gooey. That’s what many Red State Republicans are. For gosh sake, you can’t get any redder than South Carolina, and look at what it’s inflicted upon us. Tim Scott. Lindsay Graham. Nikki Haley. Is it too much to ask a conservative state for some actual conservatives? And when I say “conservatives,” I mean 2024 conservatives, not retread 2004 conservatives who accept liberal premises and specialize in competently and soberly managing our decline. I’m talking about 2024 conservatives who want to fight the power, who want to own the libs, who want to win, dammit.


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1   HeadSet   2024 Feb 9, 7:14am  

AmericanKulak says

Dutch sharpies ripped off the local indigenous peoples by buying Manhattan for 20 bucks worth of beads and some smallpox-laden blankets.

I know that is an attempt at humor, but one still needs some basis in reality. There were no smallpox blankets, it was $24 worth of beads, and those Indians sold the Dutch land that was not owned by their tribe.
2   Tenpoundbass   2024 Feb 9, 7:30pm  

Because the media has brainwashed everyone into being scared little pussies, that if you're too conservative then you're a terrorist or some shit.
I blame the sorry sacks of shit in congress that has allowed the besmirchment with impunity.

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