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Happy Festivus!!

Christmas morning. I can feel the peace and stillness. The one fucking day the Masters of Debt leave everyone alone. You can feel the religion. See if its not true. It blows through everyone and everything. Its bullshit of course. Some call it opiate. So I put together a little story for the rest of us.

Its a day you can learn from thought Joe Friday. He was working the day watch out of the Bunko division. They'll learn he thought. They will learn to be good people. The holiday can be a good thing. Why you can almost feel the saviour looking out at all of the happy well behaved people. They were busy in Rome blowing smoke up the ass of everyone they could find make it a big religious day. Thats where Joe comes in he has a badge.

The Hebrews of course were busy on this day. Trying to prepetuate certain myths. Blown clear out of their homeland. Helping to pile up bullshit as high as they could. After all Joe thought. A converted pagan afraid of going to hell. Is better than a heathen pagan after a Jew. They all wore oven mits. Stared ruefully at their homeland. Saying to themselves. Looks like this ain't going to work either. Old granny sure gave it her best shot. I had a rap sheet on granny. She ran a loansharking racket. Granny always did things good for business. When she felt it was in her best interest. Granny knew she couldn't get them in there the right way. Granny was always trying to expand. The loan business was good. Then something died.

He didn't want to ruin it for all the kids he thought. They were so busy opening presents. Joe thought to. Some of them will grow up to be zombies. Joe wondered about how they were going to rehabilitate the 8000 or so people he had helped toss into the penitentiary. Hell who cares let that messiah guy visit them. They could use the company. Made sense to him now. Joe didn't want to visit them. He knew they wanted to get ahold of his ass.

Joe closed the file on the 300 hundred or so missing Russian atomic suitcase bombs. He had handled that one yesterday. He wasn't quite sure how the fuck he had done it. But he thought to himself. I did a good job. The world is safe.

That added to the fact he had kept Al queada with the help of his partner out of America for over 11 years. Im going to get a promotion for that one Joe thought. I can sure use the raise. Religious nuts. Tough to deal with. Sometimes you can stop fanatics. With a little effort. Joe wondered how he would make out in the rest of the world. However the borders were safe. Drugs. I'll handle that one next week, maybe on Saturday thought Friday. He had heard about some Al Queada humping it across the border on the shoulders of illegal Mexicans. It was a loophole Joe had a hard time closing.

Joe wondered. Maybe we need what those commies had. An iron curtain. A border almost 9 times a long as the Mexican one. Yea he thought. Those Russians really know how to build a wall. Yea, I'm a real believer Joe smiled.

Joe just could not break the stillness of the day. He wondered how they did it.