patrick.net

If I don't make the top ten, I'll cry...

But my all-time favorite is everything every said by bearmarket - especially zerosexuality and his sister (the slut). Ah, brings tears to my eyes.

Are threads like this "POLITE"?
Or do we Cherry pick where we draw the line?

I'll give bear market this much, he was right about housing. Most of us were saying the housing downturn would be 20%, maybe 25%, he was predicting 50% or more and in most areas of the country he was right.

Mr.Fantastic says

Who cares about being polite, let’s get real gents!
Here are some of my favorites from this board.
A fine prediction by our board’s local genius.
tatupu70 says

If the economy improves, housing will be fine.

Here’s a great one where tatupu70 was bragging how he could’ve bought a Bay Area house in a nice neighborhood. Keep in mind median prices for “nice parts” of the Bay Area hover over $600,000, 6x tatupu’s income:
tatupu70 says

And I think you are missing the point. I could have bought a house if I wanted to.

tatupu70 says

I recently lived in Northern CA(not the Bay area) and lived very comfortably on $100K/year.

I'm laughing. I'll nominate the above post. Read the last quote from me again. See where I made a point to say--NOT the Bay Area? So, how exactly is the median price in the Bay Area relevant?

Mr.Fantastic says

It’s relevant because in the original thread we were talking about the BAY AREA:
Mr. Fantastic says

28/36 is the ratio of affordability. Anything above that is simply too risky, and not a good financial move. Bay Area homes are extremely pricey, and with lack of credit, demand is going to go down, bringing prices down.

tatupu70 says

And I think you are missing the point. I could have bought a house if I wanted to.

That’s when you decided to chime in with your “I could’ve afforded a house.”
But certainly not on your 100k salary.

And that's why I was careful to say that I wasn't living in the Bay Area. So there wasn't any confusion. Maybe I should have put it in bold for you? Or in a different color, perhaps?

Fantastick--

Well, you've succeeded in hijacking this thread. Congrats.

Second you are completely wrong again. Here's the post you referenced:

tatupu70

It could be as you say Michelle in some parts of CA, but I recently lived in Northern CA(not the Bay area) and lived very comfortably on $100K/year. Rented a house in a very nice area for $1650/mo.

I imagine that you must be in Southern CA because noone would stay in the Bay area because of the weather! Maybe you can rethink your reasons for staying though because in your own words the costs exceed the benefits of living there. There are plenty of attractions in other cities. And no forest fires or mudslides!

Oct 23, 2009 12:28 PM — [ ] — 20 year-old buys $183K home with FHA 3.5% down...

As you can clearly see, it's from Oct. 23, 2009. Over 15 months ago.

The second post about buying a house if I want to was from less than a month ago. And came after you had posted the above statement about not living in the Bay Area.

Now you are just being dishonest. Please give it up.

Can you nominate yourself? I was dissing gold a while back and boy was I wrong about that....

Now you have to post the same lies on two threads? Give it up already. What is wrong with you?

Mr.Fantastic says

I own a home in a Top 20 metro area, and the median salary is 108k.
Remember this is a guy who claimed he made 100k, now trying to claim he lives in an area where 108k is the median:
tatupu70 says
I recently lived in Northern CA(not the Bay area) and lived very comfortably on $100K/year.
This is almost too easy.

You can't be this stupid. First of all, are you implying that someone making $100K can't live in an area where the median household income is 108K? Really? You need to get out more. Do you live at Lake Wobegon?

Second, my salary WAS ~$100K several years ago. My wife also works. Our household income is well above the median. I've been over this all before. What don't you understand?? fyi--the median home value is ~2.2 times our household income.

Vincent the Gold saga isn't over by far.
Today was a prelude before a tickle even.
Gold is poised to be Volatile. Those vested in Gold have made a ton of money, especially if they got in early.
But people that bought Gold when we were laughing at them, still has it tied in Gold to help build the run Gold has been on.

I suspect when Gold goes the rug is going to be pulled out from under many before they type URL of their e-trade account. Gold isn't holding near 1400 on it's own inertia, no body has pulled their chips out of the pot yet. It's like watching a game of 5 card stud, there's only going to be a few winners period. Those that bought at 800 - 1000 might stand a chance. But those that jumped on the band wagon when it hit 1200 will be lucky if they don't lose money. And Gold trades almost $40 down, the same day news is touting Boca Raton got its first Gold ATM, doesn't bode well, for those that were expecting even Red Box DVD rental booths success.

Gold is going to take 400 to 500 drop in a matter of minutes when it goes.

Mr.Fantastic says

Now you’re trying to claim you make much more, oh and btw, your wife makes a lot too. Oh, and btw you own a home now, when you claimed you didn’t own one before.

The post you reference was from the fall of 2009. so that's over a year ago already. And I like how you add the "very" in there. I just said "recently". In my mind 2-3 years ago is still recent. So my post is over a year old plus 2-3 years since moving and you're at ~4 years ago now. Can you follow that?

I never claimed I didn't own a home. I was joking because the poster automatically assumed I did.

Dumbest things read on Patrick.net?

"Delete me" threads, why did we get sucked into those.....

Mr.Fantastic says

The post was from Oct 23, 2009. That means you claimed to be making 100k about 14 months ago.
But anyway, it’s tatupu story time, let me get this straight:
- Now you’re claiming “recently” is 3 years ago.
- Not only that, you only claimed to not have a home as a joke. Ha ha.
Digging deeper.

What am I digging exactly? Now you're arguing about the meaning of the word recent? Is that all you've got left? Whatever you say.

And I'm still waiting for yofu to show me where I said I didn't own a home... And while you're looking, how about you finding where I said home prices were going to rise? That's another of your lies...

So, I'll take that as a no--you couldn't find anywhere I said I wasn't a homeowner.

Mr.Fantastic says

No one making your salary can buy a decent SFR in the Bay Area.

I disagree on that. How is a $600k home not affordable at $100k/year salary? Forget about the 3x income rule.

$100k/year salary in the Bay Area can buy you a decent home AND live comfortably. If you're married, your spouse shouldn't have to work either.

I don't know what kind of lifestyle you are expecting and what you think you should be entitled to.

vain says

How is a $600k home not affordable at $100k/year salary? Forget about the 3x income rule.

A $100k salary is a handsome salary. It should be able to buy you a decent home. But it will not buy you a $600k home and if that is what a "decent" home starts at in SF, then you should not qualify to borrow that much. I think I read where you saved and lived at home, etc. There are ways to make things happen. That was very smart of you. But, someone making $100k annually shouldn't have a mortgage of $600k. Mr. Fantastic has not played nice on this thread but is correct on that point IMO.

I agree--I would never take out a $600K mortgage on a $100K salary. It may be doable, but I think you'd be awfully house poor.

Artistsoul,

But if one to have a $100k/year salary, even if they did not live at home, where is all the money? They should have saved up at an even higher rate. There are plenty of homes in SF for about $500k. $600k is about the price you need to pay if you want to get out of colored neighborhoods it seems. But does someone really need to live IN San Francisco? $500kish will get you a home in many decent areas in the peninsula.

5-6x income is pretty steep, but still seems reasonable. Perhaps it wouldn't feel so steep if we all weren't so sure prices will continue to decline.

shrekgrinch says

Wow! My name didn’t come up ONCE on here. I need to work harder to piss off more people by exposing their precious worldviews don’t stand up to logic, history and economics.
Either that or most of you are ingoring me so you don’t see the great job I am doing.

Is this your submission for "dumbest things"?

I nominate George Bush Jr.:

50. "I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here." --at the President's Economic Forum in Waco, Texas, Aug. 13, 2002

49. "We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease." --Gothenburg, Sweden, June 14, 2001

48. "You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test." -Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001

47. "I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport." --Washington, D.C., Oct. 3, 2001

46. "Tribal sovereignty means that; it's sovereign. I mean, you're a -- you've been given sovereignty, and you're viewed as a sovereign entity. And therefore the relationship between the federal government and tribes is one between sovereign entities." --Washington, D.C., Aug. 6, 2004 (Watch video clip)

45. "I couldn't imagine somebody like Osama bin Laden understanding the joy of Hanukkah." --at a White House menorah lighting ceremony, Washington, D.C., Dec. 10, 2001 (Listen to audio clip)

44. "You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror." --interview with CBS News' Katie Couric, Sept. 6, 2006

43. "The same folks that are bombing innocent people in Iraq were the ones who attacked us in America on September the 11th." --Washington, D.C., July 12, 2007

42. "I'm the commander -- see, I don't need to explain -- I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president." --as quoted in Bob Woodward's Bush at War

41. "Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties." --discussing the Iraq war with Christian Coalition founder Pat Robertson in 2003, as quoted by Robertson

40. 3. "I think I was unprepared for war." –on the biggest regret of his presidency, ABC News interview, Dec. 1, 2008

39. "I will not withdraw, even if Laura and Barney are the only ones supporting me." --talking to key Republicans about Iraq, as quoted by Bob Woodward

38. "I hear there's rumors on the Internets that we're going to have a draft." --presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004 (Watch video clip)

37. "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family." --Greater Nashua, N.H., Chamber of Commerce, Jan. 27, 2000 (Listen to audio clip)

36. "Do you have blacks, too?" --to Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001

35. "This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating." --as quoted by the New York Daily News, April 23, 2002

34. "I don't think anybody anticipated the breach of the levees." --on "Good Morning America," Sept. 1, 2005, six days after repeated warnings from experts about the scope of damage expected from Hurricane Katrina

33. "I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully." --Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000

32. "I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound largemouth bass in my lake." --on his best moment in office, interview with the German newspaper Bild am Sonntag, May 7, 2006

31. "They misunderestimated me." --Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000

30. "For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." --Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001

29. "This is an impressive crowd -- the haves and the have mores. Some people call you the elite -- I call you my base." --at the 2000 Al Smith dinner

28. "Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." --LaCrosse, Wis., Oct. 18, 2000

27. "I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe -- I believe what I believe is right." --Rome, Italy, July 22, 2001

26. "See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda." --Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005 (Listen to audio clip)

25. "People say, how can I help on this war against terror? How can I fight evil? You can do so by mentoring a child; by going into a shut-in's house and say I love you." --Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2002

24. "I wish you'd have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it...I'm sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this press conference, with all the pressure of trying to come up with answer, but it hadn't yet...I don't want to sound like I have made no mistakes. I'm confident I have. I just haven't -- you just put me under the spot here, and maybe I'm not as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one." --after being asked to name the biggest mistake he had made, Washington, D.C., April 3, 2004

23. "You forgot Poland." --to Sen. John Kerry during the first presidential debate, after Kerry failed to mention Poland's contributions to the Iraq war coalition, Miami, Fla., Sept. 30, 2004

22. "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter." --in parting words to world leaders at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as those present looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan, July 10, 2008

21. "The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa." --State of the Union Address, Jan. 28, 2003, making a claim that administration officials knew at the time to be false

20. "The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him." --Washington, D.C., Sept. 13, 2001

19. "I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority." --Washington, D.C., March 13, 2002

18. "So what?" –President Bush, responding to a an ABC News correspondent who pointed out that Al Qaeda wasn't a threat in Iraq until after the U.S. invaded, Dec. 14, 2008

17. "Can we win? I don't think you can win it." --after being asked whether the war on terror was winnable, "Today" show interview, Aug. 30, 2004

16. "I just want you to know that, when we talk about war, we're really talking about peace." --Washington, D.C. June 18, 2002

15. "I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn't do my job." --to a group of Amish he met with privately, July 9, 2004

14. "Major combat operations in Iraq have ended. In the battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed." --speaking underneath a "Mission Accomplished" banner aboard the USS Abraham Lincoln, May 1, 2003

13. "We found the weapons of mass destruction. We found biological laboratories ... And we'll find more weapons as time goes on. But for those who say we haven't found the banned manufacturing devices or banned weapons, they're wrong, we found them." --Washington, D.C., May 30, 2003

12. "Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere!" --joking about his administration's failure to find WMDs in Iraq as he narrated a comic slideshow during the Radio & TV Correspondents' Association dinner, Washington, D.C., March 24, 2004 (Read more)

11. "I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office." --Washington, D.C., May 12, 2008

10. "Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?" --Florence, South Carolina, Jan. 11, 2000

9. "As yesterday's positive report card shows, childrens do learn when standards are high and results are measured." --on the No Child Left Behind Act, Washington, D.C., Sept. 26, 2007 (Watch video clip)

8. "If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator." --Washington, D.C., Dec. 19, 2000 (Listen to audio clip)

7. "I'm the decider, and I decide what is best. And what's best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the Secretary of Defense." --Washington, D.C. April 18, 2006 (Read more; listen to audio clip; watch video clip)

6. "There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee -- that says, fool me once, shame on --shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again." --Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002 (Watch video clip)

5. "Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." --Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004 (Watch video clip)

4. "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." --Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004 (Watch video clip)

3. "You work three jobs? ... Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that." --to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005 (Listen to audio clip)

2. "Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job." --to FEMA director Michael Brown, who resigned 10 days later amid criticism over his handling of the Hurricane Katrina debacle, Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005 (Listen to audio clip; watch video clip)

1. "My answer is bring them on." --on Iraqi insurgents attacking U.S. forces, Washington, D.C., July 3, 2003

Good examples, but they were supposed to be dumbest things read on patrick.net.

Those were quotes from Shrekgrinch...what are you talking about?

Wow!...keep 'em coming! :-)

Not sure if we should award someone the "dumbest commenter of the year" though...

Looking forward to seeing more of the dumbest things said over the years by various commenters...LOL!

Mr.Fantastic says

tatupu70 says

I agree–I would never take out a $600K mortgage on a $100K salary. It may be doable, but I think you’d be awfully house poor.

Exactly. 100k doesn’t go far in California, so people usually move away to the podunks and then come on Patrick.net and lie about owning, how much they make, and their magical wives.

So now I lied about how much I make? Did I make more than 100K or less?

Oh btw--I told my wife you think she's magical. It made her day. She does make a mean chili, so you could be right...

Mr.Fantastic says

vain says

How is a $600k home not affordable at $100k/year salary?

If live at home with your parents, and live frugally, it would take you several years to save enough to qualify at the 28/36 cut off to underwrite your loan. Have you ever tried to apply for a mortgage before (without your mom cosigning)?

Nobody is cosigning for me. People probably have some serious money management issues if they cannot save earning $100k/year. You do not even need to live frugal. That's $5000/month take home pay. How much do you spend may I ask?

For a real good mental game ... try to keep this in mind ... Mr. Fantastic and tatupu70 could be the same person posting under different names. cool huh? Heck, all of you could be the same person, put here just to mess with my mind!! dang it.

Bap33 says

put here just to mess with my mind!!

Yes, and not just here online but everywhere. Maybe you are the only real person...the rest is just a game designed especially for you.

Bap33 says

Mr. Fantastic and tatupu70 could be the same person posting under different names.

I've been wondering myself if a particular character known by most (quack) might have as many personalities as Sybil on here. Heck, might as well throw in Tatupu too. Whatever. I can't decide if it's Comedy Central around here or more of a psych ward thing.

artistsoul says

I can’t decide if it’s Comedy Central around here or more of a psych ward thing.

I'm guessing it's a rare hybrid.

Mr.Fantastic,
We could all benefit from a little introspection.

Tenouncetrout says

Gold is going to take 400 to 500 drop in a matter of minutes when it goes.

I nominate this statement.

Vaticanus says

Tenouncetrout says

Gold is going to take 400 to 500 drop in a matter of minutes when it goes.

I nominate this statement.

There either one of two ways this goes. Either our economy doesn't rebound, and the world ditches the dollar, and ties a world currency to Gold. Which will be impossible. That would mean only those that bought gold in the last several years will have money and the rest of the world wont. America looses all of it's worldly luster "The world only consumes our Dollar, nothing else"

I don't see this happening ever, not with out all out world wide war. Going to a world Gold standard would put 85% of the worlds population in third world poverty, including the Majority of American citizens. A small percent of the population would be wealthy beyond their wildest dream. This would breed centuries of wars and pandemonium.

World trade production and consumption as we knew it, would be stuff of epic Historical tales about a Civilization more advanced than the Gold world they would realize.

Gold is a Hedge against a perceived notion that the dollar is collapsing. The dollar is actually stronger and has been ever since that idiotic battle call started sounding 3 years ago. The dollar was 1.57 against the Euro at that time, it has hovered 1.27 to 1.33 consistently since then.

The minute there's real perceived growth and people don't feel they are being duped by cooked numbers and pump Monkeys at the federal Plunge protection team. They will ditch Gold and invest it into what ever the new flavor of the Month that realizes us that rebound. Gold has no intrinsic value, lest we become Head hunters and primitive warriors that need a shinny Golden crest on our heads to accent the Lions tooth in our nose.

Tenouncetrout says

Vaticanus says

Tenouncetrout says

Gold is going to take 400 to 500 drop in a matter of minutes when it goes.

I nominate this statement.

There either one of two ways this goes. Either our economy doesn’t rebound, and the world ditches the dollar, and ties a world currency to Gold. Which will be impossible. That would mean only those that bought gold in the last several years will have money and the rest of the world wont. America looses all of it’s worldly luster “The world only consumes our Dollar, nothing else”
I don’t see this happening ever, not with out all out world wide war. Going to a world Gold standard would put 85% of the worlds population in third world poverty, including the Majority of American citizens. A small percent of the population would be wealthy beyond their wildest dream. This would breed centuries of wars and pandemonium.
World trade production and consumption as we knew it, would be stuff of epic Historical tales about a Civilization more advanced than the Gold world they would realize.
Gold is a Hedge against a perceived notion that the dollar is collapsing. The dollar is actually stronger and has been ever since that idiotic battle call started sounding 3 years ago. The dollar was 1.57 against the Euro at that time, it has hovered 1.27 to 1.33 consistently since then.
The minute there’s real perceived growth and people don’t feel they are being duped by cooked numbers and pump Monkeys at the federal Plunge protection team. They will ditch Gold and invest it into what ever the new flavor of the Month that realizes us that rebound. Gold has no intrinsic value, lest we become Head hunters and primitive warriors that need a shinny Golden crest on our heads to accent the Lions tooth in our nose.

When gold is at 5000 (which probably won't happen any time soon) then I could agree with your 400-500 drop statement. Until then it is as ridiculous as $5000 gold.

Mr. Fantastic:
The sexual tension is palpable around here - why don' t ya'll just get a room?

There have been some dumb things - but my reference to poopybear (bear market) was the stuff about zerosexuality... He was seriously wierd, and I'm sure that Northern PA will never be the same if he made it out of his parent's basement.

My favorite thread of all time is the fun we had with the realtor who advertised a house with a large dick for entertaining. Leigh's comment about sitting on her brother's dick made me lmao.
http://patrick.net/?p=362218

@ellie, yes, the deck one was very funny

One of my favorite jokes, which has no place here yet I feel like saying it...

Q: What is the dirtiest thing said on TV in the 50's?
A: Ward, don't you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night?

:)

"... that would be in the butt, Bob."

Bap33 says

“… that would be in the butt, Bob.”

That was in the 70's. Which begs the question - what about the 60's, 90's and 2000's? What are your favs for those decades? My fav for the 90's was in 1999 -

"this one time - in band camp..." - american pie

"It's such a fine line between stupid and clever." - spinal tap... also,
It goes to eleven (I'm paraphrasing).

...so what are yours?

pretty much all of American Graffitti runs through my mind all day ... I mentally insert lines from the movie into my day, and sing the sound track at random. I think that is pretty much how I cope and get through each day. lol

These are few that were used by me and my buds a few zillion times in the 80's-early 90s.
"... wax on, wax off..."
"... best way block punch, no be there..."
" ... use the force ..."
" ... that's not a knife, THIS is a knife ..."
"... I got a lotta mo Balboa!... You a paper champion! ..." (Mr. T in Rocky #)
"... Oh My God, Becky! ..." (Baby Got Back)

my favorite right now is "apple pie" .. but, that is an "insider" thing.

This has turned into a general joke post! Oh no....

@Bap33 Funny lines even if not from these boards.

I have to admit, my main reason for this post was to get a good laugh...It worked!

There must be quite a lot more dumb things said over the last few years here...