patrick.net

https://babylonbee.com/news/study-finds-100-of-men-would-eat-any-fruit-given-to-them-by-a-naked-woman?source=patrick.net

A double-blind study conducted by angel scientists has confirmed that 100% of men would eat any fruit given to them by a naked woman. The study seems to suggest that the fall of Adam and Eve was unavoidable.

"Our results were conclusive," said the angel Gabriel, who led the study. "Of the 30,000 male test subjects we studied, we found literally 100% of them would happily accept and eat any piece of fruit handed to them by a woman who was naked. Even in cases where it wasn't fruit—or even edible—all the males gratefully accepted every single object offered and ate it with a dumb look on their face."

Gabriel then motioned to a male test subject on the other side of the glass as he happily chewed on a rubber ball that had just been handed to him by a gorgeous unclothed woman.

"See what I mean?"

Researchers say the results should serve to humble any man who thinks he would have made a different decision than Adam. "According to the science, you would have likely done the exact same thing Adam did," said Gabriel.

Women around the world started to gloat upon hearing the news until Gabriel revealed they also conducted a study showing that 100% of women can be tricked by a talking snake.

Patrick says

https://babylonbee.com/news/study-finds-100-of-men-would-eat-any-fruit-given-to-them-by-a-naked-woman?source=patrick.net

A double-blind study conducted by angel scientists has confirmed that 100% of men would eat any fruit given to them by a naked woman. The study seems to suggest that the fall of Adam and Eve was unavoidable.

"Our results were conclusive," said the angel Gabriel, who led the study. "Of the 30,000 male test subjects we studied, we found literally 100% of them would happily accept and eat any piece of fruit handed to them by a woman who was naked. Even in cases where it wasn't fruit—or even edible—all the males gratefully accepted every single object offered and ate it with...

I dunno, man: I wouldn't eat anything given to me by naked Hillary. I would probably die instantly from visual shock.

Eric Holder says

I dunno, man: I wouldn't eat anything given to me by naked Hillary. I would probably die instantly from visual shock.

The article specifies beautiful naked woman later. They should have put that in the title.

Patrick says

Eric Holder says

I dunno, man: I wouldn't eat anything given to me by naked Hillary. I would probably die instantly from visual shock.

The article specifies beautiful naked woman later. They should have put that in the title.

Ah, reading comprehension.

Eric Holder says

A double-blind study conducted by angel scientists has confirmed that 100% of men would eat any fruit given to them by a naked woman. The study seems to suggest that the fall of Adam and Eve was unavoidable.

This is why you never take a bite until after you rip off your piece of tail from the wench.

HunterTits says

Also Meta booth (on the right).

Tenpoundbass says

Was the cat black?

Fortwaynemobile says

Was the cat black?

I was working on an answer to your question when my answer I was giving, made me get your joke was a facetious question.

New employee perk!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0y0oLnYdlY&source=patrick.net

Do I have to declare my free crack pipe as income on my tax return?

Call your side chick.

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Ever see a Tesla fly?

Tornado in Texas. Not funny, just damn.

Truck whirled and flipped, flipped back onto tires and drives away. Guess they need to include that in one of their truck commercials. "Tornado Tough".

@Patrick - delete this if you want - even without viewing it. It's HIGHLY disturbing.

I'm a little reluctant to post this, and it's NOT funny, but just to underscore who is in power.

This is from Hunter Biden's laptop, supposedly - be forwarned, this isn't probably illegal, but it's damned close, and highly disturbing.

disturbing picture from Hunter Biden's laptop, supposedly.

We all have Steve Bannon to thank for the Laptop from hell going no where, when it did.

Steve was controlled opposition to normalize those photos and the contents. Steve Bannon promised all of Trump supporters proof Joe Biden was caught up in shady illegal international bribery and skullduggery. So we watched and watched the Chinese connected website he promoted that had the goods, and was going to bring Biden and Clinton down. What we got was a constant barrage of Hunter Biden dick pics, and him doing hookers and blow. Without identifying the female in the photos and having a clear victim, then they can say those girls were anyone. A midget with no assets for example. I'm not waging that as an excuse, but it's the reality of where these photos will go.
There was even one photo in there they claimed it was Obama's alleged daughter. But all we saw is a big bushy hair do, and a mole on her ass. That could have been any black woman with light skin and a lose kinky fro.

I have come to realize, that people like Bannon, Jones, Hannity, and Carlson, are only there to release pressure on issues so they don't explode and come to ahead.

Had the laptop gone through the proper channels, then more would have been done about it. But by time the purported "Fake News Conspiracy theorists"(Also part of their job description and for this purpose), got done running it through the rumor mill. Most Americans were willing to just chalk it off as salacious libelous slander by the Fox hosts and Conspiracy YouTubers.

But had it been reported that such a speculated laptop exists and verified by an independent source like Judicial Watch(Without going into the detail Steve Bannon went into). Folks would have been curious why the DOJ was dismissing it.

Then even if it did take posting some of it on the internet to get more momentum going on the truth. Steve Bannon and those releasing the slow drip of info, could have censored the content and used pixilation and redactions.

Like with sex, sometimes less revealing less can be more titillating than having it all hang out with cellulite and all.

Doing a smut dump the way Steve did, was meant to put everyone off on the truth.

Tenpoundbass says

But had it been reported that such a speculated laptop exists and verified by an independent source like Judicial Watch(Without going into the detail Steve Bannon went into). Folks would have been curious why the DOJ was dismissing it.

We're all curious as to why Hillary Clinton wasn't prosecuted, especially since we could read her emails, and found out "AQ" (Al-Qaeda) were our friends in Syria - but we know the truth.

Had the laptop just gone to the FIB, it would have been buried, and it would have just been rumors.

Yes, I agree there's a lot of false opposition, but at least we know what kind of fucking sick assholes our government is, has always been.

Nothing is going to come of the "investigation into Hunter Biden" and there is an ongoing one now.

A 2020 corolla but yeah.

Bad. Sharing anyway.

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So bad it's good.

Shadows of zebras make zebras look like their shadows.

richwicks says

@Patrick - delete this if you want - even without viewing it. It's HIGHLY disturbing.

I'm a little reluctant to post this, and it's NOT funny, but just to underscore who is in power.

This is from Hunter Biden's laptop, supposedly - be forwarned, this isn't probably illegal, but it's damned close, and highly disturbing.

disturbing picture from Hunter Biden's laptop, supposedly.

Its hunter bidden w/ a 6yr old girl in lingerie.

IMO the pic on the right looks fake. The shadows are odd the way his arm casts downwards onto the wall, and so does her head, but not her body or legs onto the floor.

Hircus says

IMO the pic on the right looks fake. The shadows are odd the way his arm casts downwards onto the wall, and so does her head, but not her body or legs onto the floor.

I hope it is fake. That would be comforting to know, or at least believe.

Truck gets blown around by tornado, blown upright again, drives away.




https://notthebee.com/article/this-is-a-story-about-a-red-truck-and-a-tornado-i-cannot-believe-they-drove-away-like-that?source=patrick.net