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Funny picture thread


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2011 Dec 9, 1:03am   1,310,409 views  9,648 comments

by zzyzzx   ➕follow (9)   💰tip   ignore  





#humor

« First        Comments 5,707 - 5,746 of 9,648       Last »     Search these comments

5707   Ceffer   2023 Apr 13, 7:09pm  

You only THINK you are too busy for that walk.
5709   Patrick   2023 Apr 14, 10:29am  




Not a job I'd want.
5712   Ceffer   2023 Apr 15, 7:36am  

Sorry, not marriage material:
5716   Tenpoundbass   2023 Apr 16, 9:46am  

Patrick says






The puzzle states sharing the apple between "Three" people. So going Fatwah on one, so two can each have an apple. Isn't a valid answer.
5717   Patrick   2023 Apr 16, 9:47am  

The real answer is to cut two of them into 2/3 and 1/3 piece at once.

The joke is the fatwah answer occurring to the monkey.
5722   Ceffer   2023 Apr 16, 4:05pm  

Patrick says

The real answer is to cut two of them into 2/3 and 1/3 piece at once.

Hmm, actually got this one right. Does that mean I am in an elite 6%, or a non-elite autistic driveling minority?
5723   RC2006   2023 Apr 16, 4:11pm  

Ceffer says

Patrick says


The real answer is to cut two of them into 2/3 and 1/3 piece at once.

Hmm, actually got this one right. Does that mean I am in an elite 6%, or a non-elite autistic driveling minority?

I thought the answer was to stab one person.
5724   Patrick   2023 Apr 16, 6:11pm  

That also works. Which is the joke.
5725   Onvacation   2023 Apr 18, 7:51am  

If you swing the blade just right you can get two carotid arteries with one swipe and have all the apples.
5726   Patrick   2023 Apr 18, 9:37am  

Next level: can you get the arteries and the apples without getting blood all over them?
5729   KgK one   2023 Apr 18, 11:39am  

Patrick says





If any religion is good for you, you don't need to convert people. What other groups need initiation process , hmm
5730   Ceffer   2023 Apr 18, 11:46am  

Does converting to pdf mean there is a God Font?
5731   Patrick   2023 Apr 18, 12:49pm  

KgK one says

If any religion is good for you, you don't need to convert people. What other groups need initiation process , hmm


Rich ethnically-based religions do not seek converts. So Jews discourage conversion to Judaism, and Parsis prohibit it entirely.
5732   1337irr   2023 Apr 18, 1:33pm  

KgK one says

Patrick says






If any religion is good for you, you don't need to convert people. What other groups need initiation process , hmm

I started my own cult in middle school, you all want to join?
5733   Patrick   2023 Apr 18, 1:34pm  

What does it cost and what do we get?

10% of income for unlimited virgins in heaven?
5734   Onvacation   2023 Apr 18, 5:34pm  

Patrick says

unlimited virgins in heaven

Careful what you wish for.
5735   richwicks   2023 Apr 18, 5:44pm  

Onvacation says

Patrick says


unlimited virgins in heaven

Careful what you wish for.


It would be a bunch of fat pasty video game players who died of heart attacks at 35.
5739   Patrick   2023 Apr 18, 10:45pm  




I have seen this myself in the Netherlands.
5741   richwicks   2023 Apr 19, 1:33am  

Patrick says





I have seen this myself in the Netherlands.


Well, good for them! I've always aimed for the hole or the cake. If the location of the fly is what I've always should have been pointing at, I appreciate knowing now. Somebody should have come up with a target ages ago, with a high score scoreboard. Men are competitive after all.
5745   mell   2023 Apr 19, 8:05pm  



5746   Ceffer   2023 Apr 21, 4:17pm  

This reassures the tattooed that they are, indeed, living an unhealthy, self destructive lifestyle and that they need to increase their drug and sex pig behaviors if they become too well.

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