patrick.net

AWWWSSsooomeee!

Already I can't wait for Sharknado Two where they kick-it-up a notch by chaining rabid man-eating apes to the sharks.

Looks much better than this piece of crap...

Yes, I did watch this movie and you would not believe how many pairs of people swim apart from each other the same exact distance as giant two-headed shark mouths.

The premise is solid based in hard science.

CaptainShuddup says

The premise is solid based in hard science.

Yes I think it is brought to you by the same people who brought you global warming, Keynesian economics, etc

leo707 says

Looks much better than this piece of crap...

Yes, I did watch this movie and you would not believe how many pairs of people swim apart from each other the same exact distance as giant two-headed shark mouths.

NO PITY FOR YOU!

You knew damn well what you were setting yourself up for when you bought that ticket.

New Renter says

You knew damn well what you were setting yourself up for when you bought that ticket.

Actually, it was a late-night Netflix watch instant.

And, yes I am not deserving pity, it was pretty much exactly the experience I was expecting.

leo707 says

New Renter says

You knew damn well what you were setting yourself up for when you bought that ticket.

Actually, it was a late-night Netflix watch instant.

And, yes I am not deserving pity, it was pretty much exactly the experience I was expecting.

Well at least you didn't lose money.

CaptainShuddup says

The premise is solid based in hard science.

http://popwatch.ew.com/2013/07/12/sharknado-syfy-react/?hpt=hp_t2

It’s scientific. ”Bombs. Instead of letting live sharks rain down on people, we’re going to get into that chopper, throw bombs into the tornado, and blow those bastards to bits!” Matt uses his flight school training to calculate a flawless solution to the shark-littered twisters wreaking havoc across L.A. Baz teaches his disciples that a tornado is just two winds blowing at different speeds that combine and rotate together. Fin, Matt, and Baz combine their masterful knowledge of nature and physics only to inform us that you can actually just throw a homemade bomb into the center of the cyclone to neutralize it, and the sun comes out immediately after detonation.

It’s a political commentary. It reminds us that we should all be aware of the negative affects of global warming and never underestimate the potentials of Mother Nature...

The sad part is, I was being facetious.
And you guys wonder why Global warming isn't taken serious by the smart folk in town.

You idiots made me laugh out loud in my quite office!

CaptainShuddup says

It’s scientific. ”Bombs. Instead of letting live sharks rain down on people, we’re going to get into that chopper, throw bombs into the tornado, and blow those bastards to bits!” Matt uses his flight school training to calculate a flawless solution to the shark-littered twisters wreaking havoc across L.A. Baz teaches his disciples that a tornado is just two winds blowing at different speeds that combine and rotate together. Fin, Matt, and Baz combine their masterful knowledge of nature and physics only to inform us that you can actually just throw a homemade bomb into the center of the cyclone to neutralize it, and the sun comes out immediately after detonation.

It’s a political commentary. It reminds us that we should all be aware of the negative affects of global warming and never underestimate the potentials of Mother Nature...

So were they, Onion type sarcasm, if they were serious they are too stupid to live.

From the same people who brought you Lincoln Vampire Hunter.

If the wind is causing sharks to fly about randomly, then what's keeping all the humans on the ground?

Tara Reid (one of the "stars" of this cinematic masterpiece), made the top of the list of my all-time stupid people quotes:

Referring to her own intelligence, she said, "I make Jessica Simpson look like a Rock Scientist."

(Jessica Simpson famously questioned what kind of chicken lived in the ocean while attempting to open a can of tuna fish that said, "chicken of the sea" on the label.)

With such a brilliant actress as this, sharknado should have been awesome!

Dan8267 says

If the wind is causing sharks to fly about randomly, then what's keeping all the humans on the ground?

And that is the part you have a problem with?

I think it is just professional courtesy on the part of the tornado, parts of the movie indicate this as you will also see lawyers and the wicked witch of the east flying around as well

elliemae says

Tara Reid (one of the "stars" of this cinematic masterpiece), made the top of the list of my all-time stupid people quotes:

And yet her genetic code is valued more than Einstein's, Hawkings', and Turing's combined.

elliemae says

(Jessica Simpson famously questioned what kind of chicken lived in the ocean while attempting to open a can of tuna fish that said, "chicken of the sea" on the label.)

Actually look at all the press she got out of it, dumb like a fox and a half

Jessica is the face of a billion dollar company. She's dumb as sand but her daddy was brilliant. The girl can barely speak, can't act, sings like a cat in heat, and ain't all that pretty.

You don't have to be talented, you just have to have the right people behind you. Proof of that is Channing Tatum, a guy whose acting ability is laughable and his looks are average. He has a great agent who has convinced the Hollywood Elite that this is the "look" everyone wants.

elliemae says

Jessica is the face of a billion dollar company. She's dumb as sand but her daddy was brilliant.

I stand corrected. So she doesn't have to do anything but still rakes in the booty, truly obtuse...

elliemae says

You don't have to be talented, you just have to have the right people behind you. Proof of that is Channing Tatum, a guy whose acting ability is laughable and his looks are average. He has a great agent who has convinced the Hollywood Elite that this is the "look" everyone wants.

Yep:

Dan8267 says

elliemae says

Tara Reid (one of the "stars" of this cinematic masterpiece), made the top of the list of my all-time stupid people quotes:

And yet her genetic code is valued more than Einstein's, Hawkings', and Turing's combined.

By males yes. Males would have a difficult time breeding with Einstein, Hawkings, and Turing.

Hawking shouldn't be on that list. I don't know anyone who wants a kid with his type of disability. Sure he's brilliant, but utterly miserable. I'd rather be a dumb hot girl than him any lifetime. He may have contributed significantly to science, but nobody wants to be him. Poor guy.

New Renter says

Males would have a difficult time breeding with Einstein, Hawkings, and Turing.

I get it. Men want perfection, which is why she had her multiple lipos and breast implants gone bad...

http://siliconeholocaust.info/home/photos1a.php

indigenous says

So were they, Onion type sarcasm, if they were serious they are too stupid to live.

Yeah, they were being silly. This was the end of the article:
"It’s an hour-and-a-half of ridiculous, slapstick, theatrical, scientifically-impossible fun. With few tricks up its sleeve, Sharknado only adds to the list of hysterical Syfy monster-dramas that make for a shamelessly brainless 90 minutes well-spent. And as the movie tagline affirms, 'Enough said.'"

http://popwatch.ew.com/2013/07/12/sharknado-syfy-react/

Dan8267 says

If the wind is causing sharks to fly about randomly, then what's keeping all the humans on the ground?

Com'on Dan, you are a man of science. Humans don't have the fins to generate the lift.

Dan8267 says

If the wind is causing sharks to fly about randomly, then what's keeping all the humans on the ground?

That's all you got?

THAT'S ALL YOU GOT?

As long as you are shooting sharks in a barrel, try harder.

elliemae says

Proof of that is Channing Tatum, a guy whose acting ability is laughable and his looks are average.

I am guessing that you missed his performance in "This Is the End", me thinks you will change your mind after you see the inspired and masterful performance by Channing Tatum.

Well at least Channing Tatum is not the kid of a Hollywood insider and made it on his own. Unlike Jaden Smith, Tori Spelling et al.

You know a shit ton of people will watch this simply because it is so stupid. I think that was the point.

lostand confused says

Well at least Channing Tatum is not the kid of a Hollywood insider and made it on his own. Unlike Jaden Smith, Tori Spelling et al.

There are celebrity kids that turn out A-OK in my book:

I watched SHARKNADO! on SyFy last night and it was amaze-balls.

Didn't know it was a thing, but I found it utterly satisfying. Sharks swimming up the streets, sharks in the house, sharks in the pool at the old folks home, sharks flying out of tornadoes ripping peoples arms off. Killing sharks with shotguns, chainsaws, hedge trimmers, and IEDs. Epic.

elliemae says

New Renter says

Males would have a difficult time breeding with Einstein, Hawkings, and Turing.

I get it. Men want perfection, which is why she had her multiple lipos and breast implants gone bad...

http://siliconeholocaust.info/home/photos1a.php

Perfection or best offer...

I was disappointed in the movie. I was expecting a lot more snapper.

Sharknado II leaked:

“Sharknado” Debunked: Ridiculous Plotpoints Exposed
http://www.accuweather.com/en/features/trend/sharknado_debunked_ridiculous/15181031

Sharknami (Shark Tsunami) does sound awesome.

But let's kick it up a notch with...

Go Vicente!!!!!