patrick.net

https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-prevented-from-wandering-too-far-with-handy-new-toddler-leash

https://slaynews.com/news/wh-press-corps-turns-on-biden-demands-joe-take-unscripted-questions-the-administrations-continued-efforts-to-limit-access-to-the-president-cannot-be-defended/

The Washington D.C. liberal media is turning on Joe Biden after growing tired of limited access to the Democrat president.

The White House press corps is now demanding President Biden take real, unscripted questions from the media.

They want Biden to start taking legitimate questions from reporters who are not pre-selected by staff, arguing that denying this access “cannot be defended.”

Reporters say they are left questioning who is answering the president’s questions when he is reading pre-prepared answers from a script.

Tonight, 68 White House journalists asked @PressSec to end the mysterious prescreening of reporters let into President Biden’s events, calling it ‘antithetical to the concept of a free press’ https://t.co/X5CN1qBL3m pic.twitter.com/v2SqOoBazQ

— Steven Nelson (@stevennelson10) June 30, 2022

Of course they don't want that corrupt and senile pedophile actually answering any real questions.

https://slaynews.com/news/americans-believe-bidens-government-corrupt-poll/

A majority of Americans said Biden’s government is “corrupt and rigged against everyday people like me,” including two-thirds of Republicans and independents, and about half of Democrats.

https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-calls-on-pollsters-to-raise-his-approval-rating

https://thenationalpulse.com/2022/07/06/doe-employee-requests-opm-investigation-into-sam-brinton/

https://notthebee.com/article/the-rnc-put-together-this-montage-of-sleepy-joe-forgetting-peoples-names-and-it-is-scary-to-watch

Patrick says

the Biden administration has also suggested destroying interstate highways, not because the roads are bad infrastructure but because they were built by a racist society in the 1960s.

Did they really say that?

https://babylonbee.com/news/white-house-clarifies-that-biden-mistakenly-claimed-to-have-cancer-due-to-his-dementia

https://kunstler.com/clusterfuck-nation/the-last-days-of-joe-biden/

Onvacation says

Patrick says

the Biden administration has also suggested destroying interstate highways, not because the roads are bad infrastructure but because they were built by a racist society in the 1960s.

Did they really say that?

https://www.westernjournal.com/roads-racist-buttigieg-says-racism-literally-built-roads-must-destroyed-rebuilt/

Also here, but a paywall: https://spectatorworld.com/topic/joe-biden-racial-equity-plan-bound-backfire/#:~:text=As%20part%20of%20its%20multi-trillion-dollar%20Build%20Back%20Better,state%20level%2C%20equity%20drives%20can%20be%20equally%20bizarre.

https://www.ntd.com/gen-mark-milley-china-becoming-more-aggressive-in-pacific_813916.html

Of course China is becoming more aggressive. It's hard to imagine a weaker or less competent president.

Patrick says

https://www.ntd.com/gen-mark-milley-china-becoming-more-aggressive-in-pacific_813916.html

Of course China is becoming more aggressive. It's hard to imagine a weaker or less competent president.

Gee, Milley, maybe we should de-woke the military and remove the jab mandate.

https://boriquagato.substack.com/p/unbridled-malign-creativity

Well, the Army was the 1st branch of the armed services to come out with how badly its recruiting has been this year. Looks like they are gonna be about 33k soldiers less than they want by years end, and this is with the highest recruiting bonuses on record.

I figure the other services are about the same; down about 10% of the numbers they want. Guess the tough guy attitude gets lost when you realize that some trans is gonna order you around. Who would volunteer for that crap?

They are scaping the complete losers of society to get someone to serve,

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/us-army-plans-new-pre-boot-camp-training-program-for-recruits-who-don-t-meet-standards-as-alarms-sound-on-recruitment/ar-AA102vzL?cvid=1ed730d699e84448af997f8d7bd1544c

Biden in his excellent skills as commander is gonna kick out about 40k troops in the Guard and Reserve for not taking the vaxx. --- Brilliant

https://www.foxnews.com/politics/joe-biden-met-14-hunters-business-associates-vice-president

Joe Biden met with at least 14 of Hunter’s business associates while vice president
President Biden has repeatedly denied discussing business with his son

Biden was selling influence over US government policy.

https://notthebee.com/article/new-poll-shows-75-of-democrats-dont-want-sleepy-joe-to-run-again

New CNN poll shows 75% of DEMOCRATS don't want Sleepy Joe to run again

https://babylonbee.com/news/infographic-words-redefined-by-the-biden-administration

https://kunstler.com/clusterfuck-nation/playing-chicken-with-the-fates/

Who is surprised that the US government’s war on the American people is not going any better than its sponsored war in Ukraine? The only thing the government is really good at is covering up its crimes, which mainly requires them to do nothing — don’t investigate anything, don’t furnish documents to anyone, don’t answer official letters, slow-walk every required action, and otherwise dodge, duck, deny, deflect, and dissemble.

Now, even that game-plan is falling apart. Some senior officials in the FBI turned whistleblower this week, perhaps desperate to preserve their self-respect, and finally cleared up one of the great mystifications of our time, namely: How is it that the Hunter Biden laptop, stuffed with incriminating memoranda of bribery, treason, and diverse felonies, and in the FBI’s possession for two-and-a-half years now, just sat gathering dust in some sub-sub-basement cubby-hole — while “Joe Biden,” the putative president (or, more likely, the enigmatic claque behind him) was allowed to carry out a demolition of America’s economy and culture?

The answer is one Brian Auten, FBI Senior Analyst, who engineered a scheme to label Hunter’s laptop “Russian disinformation,” which allowed FBI Director Christopher Wray to throw a switch that turned off any further inquiry in the matter beginning in August before the 2020 presidential election. In turn, other senior FBI officials had all the documents pertaining to the decision process on that matter locked up in a special file that would never see the light of day. ...

Turns out that Agent Brian Auten was also involved in favorably vetting the Steele Dossier when it was used to justify FISA court warrants against figures in Mr. Trump’s 2016 campaign, part of the RussiaGate operation that disordered and disabled President Trump’s entire four-year term. Well now you know. Perhaps Special Counsel John Durham knows this, too. (If he didn’t before, he must now.) Eventually, Mr. Auten will have to answer for all this, maybe after the mid-term elections. We must imagine that he will implicate many other familiar figures in the process who were on-the-scene at the time, including Peter Strzok, Andrew McCabe, and James Comey, comfortably sitting on the sidelines lo these many years enjoying their book royalties and cable news salaries.

Senator Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa), ranking member of the Judiciary Committee, says he will hold hearings about this. When? ...

All of this is going to blow open, of course, and all at the same time that two other big things blow up: 1) the realization that the government lied about everything in the Covid-19 story, including especially covering-up the harmful effects of their vaunted mRNA shots, and 2) deepening US economic chaos, including the implosion of markets, derivatives, banks, and the US dollar.

Some observers say that “Joe Biden” has nothing left except to shove the USA into a hot war. Kind of looks like he’s trying — sending US Special Forces to Ukraine’s border, and all. I don’t think he’ll dare cross that line, though. To me, it’s more likely that our government will summon, shall we say, a special sort of doctor from the Intel Community to administer a permanent sleeping med to the Big Guy. Did you see how bug-eyed he was on video the other day? Didn’t even blink for the longest time. Looks like he badly needs sleep… a big sleep… the biggest sleep there is. Wait for it.

Patrick says

https://notthebee.com/article/new-poll-shows-75-of-democrats-dont-want-sleepy-joe-to-run-again

New CNN poll shows 75% of DEMOCRATS don't want Sleepy Joe to run again

I want him to run again and I want him to "win" again.

That will get it through people's thick skulls what has to be done.

Patrick says

Mr. Auten will have to answer for all this,

Not likely.

https://babylonbee.com/news/white-house-hires-this-is-fine-dog-as-new-press-secretary

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Citing the candidate's qualifications at assuring everyone that everything is fine even when entire rooms are burning down around him, the White House has hired the This Is Fine Dog as its new press secretary.

While Karine Jean-Pierre has been doing a "fine" job of deflecting questions and telling everyone things are great when they are clearly not great, the White House said they wanted to make sure their press secretary "just straight-up lies about things being fine 100% of the time." The obvious choice was the This Is Fine Dog of internet meme fame.

"Mr. Dog, what about record inflation with no end in sight?" asked Peter Doocy at the This Is Fine Dog's first press conference earlier this afternoon. "What are Americans supposed to do when they can't afford basics like food, housing, and gasoline?"

"This is fine," said the This Is Fine Dog in response. He immediately received a standing ovation by the reporters gathered. He raised his paws to settle down the crowd and then said, "This is fine."

At publishing time, the This Is Fine Dog was fired after it was discovered he is not a gay woman of color. He has issued a statement assuring everyone this is fine.

https://slaynews.com/news/joe-biden-hits-rock-bottom-has-lowest-approval-rating-ever-for-president-in-sixth-quarter/

https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-drone-strike-accidentally-kills-terrorist-leader-instead-of-car-full-of-children

KABUL — Biden is demanding answers after a precision drone strike in Afghanistan actually killed a real terrorist leader named Ayman al-Zawahiri instead of a car full of innocent children, as is tradition.

"Come on, folks, we all know what drone strikes are for," said the angry President to an LOL Surprise Doll he mistook for a member of the press. "We conduct drone strikes to kill civilians in the Middle East in hopes of stirring up multigenerational hatred for the U.S. which will lead to endless war and help feed the military-industrial complex! How on earth did this actual terrorist get caught up in the mix?!"

Sources in the CIA revealed they briefly deviated from the standard procedure of killing innocents with Hellfire missiles to kill a terrorist, as Biden's poll numbers are down and people like it when presidents kill terrorists.

"The death of this austere religious scholar, while tragic, could produce a 3 to 4 point bump in Biden's approval ratings in time for the midterms," said Fitch Biggenslimes, a columnist for the Washington Post. "That's what really matters here."

Government officials assured the president they will return to their normal business of blowing up chai tea cafes and busses full of aid workers this week.

UPDATE: New reports confirm Ayman al-Zawahiri is still alive and the precision strike actually killed a busload of orphans.