Mitch McConnell

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2022 May 31, 5:00pm   6,121 views  72 comments

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Mitch McConnell, U.S. Senator Kentucky, Republican


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34   Patrick   2023 Mar 10, 6:55am  


WASHINGTON, D.C. — Poor lil' guy! According to sources, Senator Mitch McConnell became so spooked today by the release of unedited Jan 6 footage that he withdrew his head into his shell and is refusing to come out.

"Oh no! He's scared! It's ok buddy! You can come out now!" said one of his aides, attempting to coax him out with a handful of seaweed pellets. "Shhh--no one's gonna hurt you! The buffalo man is gone! Come on, it's ok!"

Eyewitnesses say the elderly Senator slowly emerged, his big eyes darting to and fro, scanning for danger. Aides were frustrated, however, when McConnell's eyes caught a glimpse of a red baseball cap out of the corner of his eye, which caused him to panic and flip over on his back and kick his legs helplessly in the air.

At publishing time, sources had confirmed Nancy Pelosi was so unsettled by the footage that she shed her skin twice.
36   Patrick   2023 Aug 31, 9:34am  


USA Today ran a ubiquitous story yesterday afternoon headlined “Mitch McConnell to consult doctor after freezing, struggling to speak for second time this summer.”

It was ugly.

Before I show you the video, which is bad enough, what was even worse was how Establishment Media broadcast the story on all channels within minutes of McConnell’s mini-stroke, or whatever it was. Compare this coverage to all the coverage of, say, Fetterman struggling to speak, or Biden wandering aimlessly off stages, enthusiastically shaking hands with invisible friends, or suddenly tumbling off stationary bicycles onto prepubescent girls.

Sorry. I mean, compare it to the non-coverage of Fetterman, Biden, or even Diane Feinstein, for that matter.

Here are just the first of dozens of stories that all popped up within the two hours after McConnell’s brief illness...

It’s nice the democrat party has an Establishment Media. The Republicans should think about getting one, too.

It’s de rigueur to roundly criticize McConnell these days, but I feel compelled to point out three important facts. First, without Mitch McConnell, Merrick Garland would be sitting fat and happy on the Supreme Court, and we would not have any of the great decisions that have come down in the last two years. As bad as Garland is at DOJ, a lifetime appointment to the Supreme Court would have been infinitely worse, a prospect literally 1,000 times more horrifying than Gremlins multiplied by Sharknado.

Second, McConnell approved a record number of Trump appointments to federal judgeships, and Trump appointees made nearly all the decisions that eeked us out of the pandemic with our Constitutional skins mostly intact.

Finally, while lots of regular Republicans complain, with good reason, about McConnell’s lack of effective legislative action, and his somehow becoming fantastically wealthy on a Senator’s salary, democrats are grotesquely celebrating what — without some kind of miracle — will probably be the end of the Senate Minority Leader’s career.

In other words, democrats don’t see McConnell as ineffective.

Anyway, here’s the clip, if you haven’t seen it. Ironically, the humiliating and painful-to-watch freeze-up happened right after McConnell was asked about his running for re-election. ...


McConnell does not look well. More than anything, even more than what it evidences about an obvious jab injury (thanks Pfizer!), this public medical catastrophe highlights America’s geriatric, brain-damaged leadership. It is a particularly bad time in world history to have a weak, ailing minority leader.

Despite appearances, he still sounds compos mentis. Earlier in the day, a frail-looking McConnell spoke fluently about a possible government shutdown and a possible short-term spending deal. USA Today reported the Senate minority leader will be “consulting a physician prior to his next event,” according to an anonymous McConnell aide.

We pray that Mitch will receive effective medical treatment and be relieved of the stress of his current office.
39   Patrick   2023 Sep 1, 8:45am  


At publishing time, it was revealed Mitch McConnell had not actually retired. He just wanted to send even more money to Ukraine.
40   RWSGFY   2023 Sep 1, 9:36am  

Patrick says


At publishing time, it was revealed Mitch McConnell had not actually retired. He just wanted to send even more money to Ukraine.

More of Pukin's money. Good man!
43   clambo   2023 Sep 4, 3:16am  

I believe that Jagger also does much more exercise and is not using drugs or whatnot for decades.
48   Patrick   2023 Oct 4, 1:34pm  


Mitch McConnell Persuaded FTX CEO Sam Bankman-Fried to Donate Millions to Anti-Trump Republicans

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) reportedly held secretive meetings with Sam Bankman-Fried and persuaded the disgraced former FTX CEO to donate millions of dollars to anti-Trump Republicans.

McConnell gave the Democrat megadonor a list of Republican candidates who were running against President Donald Trump’s endorsements in the 2022 elections.

The meeting was revealed by Michael Lewis, the author of The Big Short, during an interview with “60 Minutes” on Sunday. ...

Lewis told “60 Minutes” that the former finance SBF met with McConnell ahead of the 2022 election to discuss donations.

During the meeting, McConnell persuaded SBF to donate millions to his list of anti-Trump candidates.

Lewis said that Bankman-Fried agreed and donated “tens of millions of dollars” to support McConnell’s anti-Trump GOP senate candidates.
49   Patrick   2023 Nov 1, 11:15am  


McConnell Working to Add $61.4 Bil. to American Taxpayers' Bill in Aid to Ukraine
52   Ceffer   2024 Feb 7, 8:42pm  

He's a shill on Satan's treadmill. He obviously was taken out and rubber hosed at one point. Like Feinstein, to stay alive at all, he has to stay in his publicity stunt position and do what he is told. Is he worth a body double, or just a funeral retirement? Play crooked mafia games, get crooked mafia results.
53   seesaw   2024 Feb 8, 11:49am  

...he should go back to being a model for Cabbage Patch Kids.
54   Patrick   2024 Feb 8, 12:45pm  


Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) has called on Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) to resign from his position as Senator Republican leader.
55   AmericanKulak   2024 Feb 8, 1:24pm  

Yeah, it's time to strike. He's in ill health, having mini-strokes for sure, he told several Senators to support the bill unread and 'trust him' and they're pissed because it's a huge stinker in an election year.

Ditch Mitch.
66   UkraineIsTotallyFucked   2024 Feb 28, 2:04pm  

At least the GOP forces their senile oldsters out instead of abuse them like the Dems did with Feinstein and currently with Biden...all to hold onto their power.
67   RayAmerica   2024 Feb 28, 3:47pm  

Don't get too excited about McConnell's departure. Long ago, the oligarchs that run the Uniparty picked his replacement. McConnell will soon be gone, but his destructive, evil spirit lives on.
69   Patrick   2024 Feb 29, 8:11am  


... McConnell also confessed that he no longer had the capacity to serve as the Republican Party leader, and so would continue doing so until after an incredibly consequential election. "You have to know when to hang it up," said McConnell. "After several episodes of losing all mental functions including the ability to speak, I had to look in the mirror and recognize that my time was up. So, I'm going to keep doing the exact same job until right after an enormously important election, after which time I'll turn it over to someone who can still consistently speak in sentences."

At publishing time, President Biden had called McConnell to ask him why on earth he had decided to retire so young.
71   RC2006   2024 May 13, 7:35pm  


He rebooted again after being asked if he is running again.
72   mell   2024 May 13, 9:19pm  

RC2006 says


He rebooted again after being asked if he is running again.

Crazy. Why is this guy not in a nursing home

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