patrick.net

I think the trust itself is just a kind of corporation which does not belong to the beneficiary in any way, and so cannot be touched.

But perhaps the regular income the guy gets from the trust is considered fair game though.

You know, this would be the kind of answer to charge a little bit for, if someone has a really good answer.

GNL says

I have a son inlaw with a trust fund. My daughter has thought a few times of leaving him. She has 2 kids and she believes him when he tells her the courts will give him the kids. Also, do you know if trust funds can be part of a divorce settlement?

What's the problem?

Whose the asshole in the marriage, are they BOTH assholes?

I'm old enough to remember when people worked things out. Both people are usually being unreasonable and unrealistic.

People going through bad times often forget how to talk to resolve differences, instead they think it's a fight to win, they are competing for status, and supremacy, rather than seeking agreement and compromise.

With my parents, and I can never tell my dad this, my mother would pick trifling bullshit to argue about, which my mother didn't care about the outcome but my father would generally win that battle. But when there was something IMPORTANT, my mother would stick to her guns and win, and use all of my father's minor victories as ammunition for this ONE win, the important one.

I hated it, because I could see though the manipulation, but people will manipulate, that's just the way it is. Instead of seeking a divorce, stop having an adversarial relationship. If they aren't being stressed by money, they're being fools. I've seen so many broken marriages over stupid reasons. I realize that by and large, it was mostly because, both people in the marriage, were just children.

I hate being in relationships at all, where there's competition. Competition on what to decide to do, on where to go out for food, what somebody should be doing, blah blah blah. Set out rules, follow them, update them later.

Just as an fyi, my daughter is my wife's daughter. No, she isn't much better as a person than he is. Unfortunately.

GNL says

I have a son inlaw with a trust fund. My daughter has thought a few times of leaving him. She has 2 kids and she believes him when he tells her the courts will give him the kids. Also, do you know if trust funds can be part of a divorce settlement?

No.

I have a trust that was set up for the benefit of male heirs. I control it now that the previous controller, my grandmother, expired. It is utterly outside any marriage. However, it pays no income, so I can't answer about the income from a trust, only the property inside it.

Another reason to keep wealth in a trust.

Whether the guy owned some account or was the beneficiary of a trust, if either were before the marriage, they are not community property, so the ex wife gets none of it

GNL says

Just as an fyi, my daughter is my wife's daughter. No, she isn't much better as a person than he is. Unfortunately.

Divorce is usually worse than people identifying and fixing their own faults.

I'm so old now, I can't be made angry anymore even with somebody vehemently disagreeing with me. I just keep asking what they think and why they believe I am wrong. I may be too inhuman to deal with kids at this point.

If I raise my voice at this point, 99.9% of the time, it's psychological manipulation, and I'm fully aware that I'm doing it.

I have a neighbor that constantly engages in sarcasm and rhetorical questions, and I keep asking him not to ask questions we already know the answer to when we both understand that a group is engaging in hypocrisy. He frustrates me because he tells me "it's impossible to change a mind", and I almost want to say to him "well, it's not, but you're just too stupid to figure out how to do it despite me trying to explain to you how to do it". I might try that, it will give him a challenge.

He will engage with a friend's very super liberal idiot wife, and just ask "well, if he was black, he can't be racist" or some nonsense like that. He's just making her crazier, instead of explaining "well, black people can be racist too. He's obviously acting like a racist" because he is too arrogant to think people can learn. He just turns liberal talking points THAT HE HEARD ON TEEEVEEEE back on her.

fucking hate tv.

richwicks says

fucking hate tv.

Yeah, me too.

long answer: depends on your state laws and trust fund terms. if it was created and given before marriage, likely not going to be part of divorce settlement as it wasn’t earned during marriage, however distribution may be considered in alimony, laws differ from state to state.

short answer: ask lawyer in your state, and read trust docs of the trust.

FortwayeAsFuckJoeBiden says

long answer: depends on your state laws and trust fund terms. if it was created and given before marriage, likely not going to be part of divorce settlement as it wasn’t earned during marriage, however distribution may be considered in alimony, laws cary from state to state.

short answer: ask lawyer in your state, and read trust docs of the trust.

I've told her twice now that advice will have to come from a lawyer. I can't imagine her leaving the marriage without enough financial support. As far as I've been told (not sure about the accuracy of this info), the 2 children have a fund set up for them already as well.

She can also go to nolo.com and see what information is there.

Community property is acquired during the marriage, not before.

A judge will surely award child support and alimony based on the spouse’s income, including income from a trust or any other source.

The joys of marriage are endless.

clambo says

She can also go to nolo.com and see what information is there.

Community property is acquired during the marriage, not before.

A judge will surely award child support and alimony based on the spouse’s income, including income from a trust or any other source.

The joys of marriage are endless.

I'm convinced that marriage is good for 2 things only. 1. It is a must in order to raise children and 2. If you marry a young enough woman, she can be your caregiver at EOL.

I actually believe there are many more benefits than those 2 but, damn, the ups and downs really take a toll. Especially for men in my position...married a woman who already had 2 kids. I do feel as though I did good in this world for helping raise 2 girls whose father abandoned them.

GNL, I see a #3 potential benefit.
#3 if the female has low or no income but owns a house, you can lower your taxes but using her social security number and filing “married filing jointly.”
If things go south, you can’t lose “her” house 😉
I’m considering this “strategery” myself.

clambo says

GNL, I see a #3 potential benefit.
#3 if the female has low or no income but owns a house, you can lower your taxes but using her social security number and filing “married filing jointly.”
If things go south, you can’t lose “her” house 😉
I’m considering this “strategery” myself.

I don't understand the strategy. You can claim half the house by filing jointly? Or just that you can save on taxes?

Just save on my taxes.

Marriage only benefits people like me, females! Why would men want to get married. I have been married twice and still can't figure out what benefit they got out of it. LOL.

Oh, and want to know who on this planet has all the money? I'll tell you. Little old ladies. Their husbands work hard stressing all life to make the buck. Then they die and we out live them by 10 or more years and end up with all the loot. Plain and simple.

casandra says

Marriage only benefits people like me, females! Why would men want to get married. I have been married twice and still can't figure out what benefit they got out of it. LOL.

Oh, and want to know who on this planet has all the money? I'll tell you. Little old ladies. Their husbands work hard stressing all life to make the buck. Then they die and we out live them by 10 or more years and end up with all the loot. Plain and simple.

Haha well said.

Usually appreciation (not the worth before marriage) during marriage counts towards community property in communityproperty states, but I don't know if it that is true for things acquired before marriage. On a moral note if she didn't have anything to do with the trust fund she should not target it, that's pretty low. Kids custody should be shared and she should get alimony of course if she has less, but they should try and work it out or amicably split. Always better than involving courts and lawyers, but diplomatic skillz are prob at an all time low.

mell says

but they should try and work it out

Yes, this was my first advice and will continue to be my advice unless there is danger. The both of them are not particularly good people. As far as the trust fund goes, if it is available to her in a settlement, I would advise her to get what the courts would allow. She's my daughter, what else would I say, right? But, if nothing else, for the sake of the kids, you know?

casandra says

Marriage only benefits people like me, females! Why would men want to get married. I have been married twice and still can't figure out what benefit they got out of it. LOL.

Oh, and want to know who on this planet has all the money? I'll tell you. Little old ladies. Their husbands work hard stressing all life to make the buck. Then they die and we out live them by 10 or more years and end up with all the loot. Plain and simple.

i can help you with that dilema.

marriage is not selfish, its giving yourself away. marriage is for the kids. niggas don’t do marriage, their kids go to shit fast.

biblical marriage is amazing, that classical family structure from the 50s is happiness no money can buy. i have that and both my wife and i are happy, and we are raising good kids.

ive helped several people get marriages on track, and they do well now too.

casandra says

Marriage only benefits people like me, females! Why would men want to get married. I have been married twice and still can't figure out what benefit they got out of it. LOL.

Oh, and want to know who on this planet has all the money? I'll tell you. Little old ladies. Their husbands work hard stressing all life to make the buck. Then they die and we out live them by 10 or more years and end up with all the loot. Plain and simple.

Rodney Dangerfield put it best when he said, “next time I feel like getting married, I’ll find a woman who I can’t stand and buy her a house!”

casandra says

Marriage only benefits people like me, females! Why would men want to get married.

I admire your honesty @casandra

Patrick says

casandra says

Marriage only benefits people like me, females! Why would men want to get married.

I admire your honesty @casandra

Casandra is, for a man, probably someone to avoid. Although maybe she is making a point. Twice married?

Cassandra tells it like it is.
They call it the battle of the sexes, but I think it's like poker.
Will the guy fold or hold when the blackmail begins?
Guys must ask themselves do they fear the desert of no female company more than they value their freedom and property?

clambo says

Cassandra tells it like it is.
They call it the battle of the sexes, but I think it's like poker.
Will the guy fold or hold when the blackmail begins?
Guys must ask themselves do they fear the desert of no female company more than they value their freedom and property?

I think she's saying women need men more than men need women.

Shaman says

Rodney Dangerfield put it best when he said, “next time I feel like getting married, I’ll find a woman who I can’t stand and buy her a house!”

I think that was Imus. Something like: Why get married? I could just find a woman I cannot stand and in ten years, buy her a house."

casandra says

Marriage only benefits people like me, females!

Do you really expect us to believe that? No way that is true. A female posting on Patnet - hardly!

There are a few. Turtledove was definitely a woman.

Think about how far men's standards for women have declined.

WIthin our lifetime, it went from "No Hymen, No Diamond" to well, what it is today.

AmericanKulak says

Think about how far men's standards for women have declined.

WIthin our lifetime, it went from "No Hymen, No Diamond" to well, what it is today.

on the left you don’t have to even be a woman to be considered one… absurd world

GNL says

Casandra is, for a man, probably someone to avoid. Although maybe she is making a point. Twice married?

Speak for yourself. I like her posts.

clambo says

value their freedom and property

just_passing_through says

GNL says

Casandra is, for a man, probably someone to avoid. Although maybe she is making a point. Twice married?

Speak for yourself. I like her posts.

Well, she diminished her value by saying what she said so...

What's in it for men? If a woman doesn't know then they aren't contributing anything of value. She kind of admitted it. And to be married twice? What are the details on that?

Wow. I didn't expect all that. Part of me feels bad. But I did find love twice for almost 20 years each. Many never find it even once!

casandra says

Wow. I didn't expect all that. Part of me feels bad. But I did find love twice for almost 20 years each. Many never find it even once!

Divorced?