patrick.net

Those statistics explain perhaps your perception, but you need to adjust for two things. You are using prevalance statistics based on how many women had HIV in the 1980s. The number of HIV+ women in North America has increased 10x since then. Guess how they got it? Outdated prevalence statistics don't tell you the risk per occurrence of specific behavior. Even current prevalence statistics result from a combination of behavior and population variables, which is why they vary between California and Nebraska and the rest of the world.

Note that heterosexual contact overtook IV drug use around 1992, i.e. a few years after the above-cited studies published in the 1980s.

Among females in the United States diagnosed 2007-2010, CDC reports several times more heterosexual transmissions than IV drug transmissions.

Diagnoses of HIV infection, by year of diagnosis and selected characteristics, 2007–2010

Persons living with a diagnosis of HIV infection

BTW, IV drug users tend to have needle marks, so it isn't so easy to lie. What surprises me though is you seem to ratchet up your insistence on a particular detail that is a mostly off topic distraction from the thread. Even your own descriptions regarding new cases seem to have shifted. You started out being right about the majority of new transmissions among the 3% subset in the USA (ignoring the 97% everywhere else in the world), but now you've exaggerated to "almost entirely," which isn't accurate. Anyway I reiterate that wives worry about adultery and prostitution, and you answer with - what exactly? - that they should have no fear because they're more likely to be killed in a car wreck? It doesn't change their concern, or the basis for it.

New Renter says

Again this is your opinion, no doubt heavily influenced by your day job.

Being a landlord?

why does nobody ask the obvious question? ... "why is there anyone trying to remove the black mark of HIV transmission from deviant sex?" Maybe it's just me that wonders ??? I guess I just find it curious.

Bap33 says

why does nobody ask the obvious question? ... "why is there anyone trying to remove the black mark of HIV transmission from deviant sex?" Maybe it's just me that wonders ??? I guess I just find it curious.

Yep, its just you...

Bap33 says

Maybe it's just me that wonders ?

Bop69, I have literally never met anyone who spent as much time "wondering" about "male/male coupling" as you do. You can't stop "wondering," but your early religious programming inhibits you from going ahead and doing, so you become obsessed. It's sad to watch. Of all the users on PatNet, I've only ever seen one other who had your problem, and alas I worry about him because of his references to slitting his own throat.

In other countries, you guys could be married already. Alas in this one you remain trapped by your early indoctrination.

I am not a guy but, marriage is a lot of putting up with each other and having fun with that. Joke laugh fight cry. The 5 things that spur a fight for us are stress, hunger, tired, confused, jealousy. Recognize those and get over it. Been married close to 18 years, known each other 22 years. The itches happen just like you said in your writing. Had kids after 8 years, that can be trying too. Until they go to school and get out of the house and give you a break. Having kids can be overwhelming, especially if they are very active ones. The kids get better with age, IMO. Once they speak your language it starts to get easier. 0-5 rough, 5-8 great! I don't know the rest yet.

New Renter says

Bap33 says

why does nobody ask the obvious question? ... "why is there anyone trying to remove the black mark of HIV transmission from deviant sex?" Maybe it's just me that wonders ??? I guess I just find it curious.

Yep, its just you...

lol .. atta boy

KILLERJANE says

Been married close to 18 years, known each other 22 years.

We have been together for 16-17 years, married for ~9. I think waiting was good...why? Just because it felt right. I think that's the key, not to rush anything unless you want to.

Women from developing countries do not have a sense of humor.

Peter P says

Women from developing countries do not have a sense of humor.

a man only needs 3 things from his woman:

1) good food
2) sex anytime
3) silence

A women only need TWO things from a man:

1. Unlimited access to his wallet
2. His understanding of her frequent headaches

but..as a bonus he should adhere to these rules:

3. Will watch rom-cons and chick flicks
4. Loves to shop only in the fanciest malls.. and we are talking 5 hours at a time and will patiently wait as she tries on clothes and rush back to the racks to get her different sizes
5. Will do dishes and dust (cleaning toilet bowl is a plus)
6. Lets her have the remote (I know that's a tough one!)

curious2 says

Syphilis can be cured by antibiotics, but it spreads anyway, because there is no vaccine.

For now, but don't worry drug resistant Syphilis is on its way.

MsBennet says

A women only need TWO things from a man:

1. Unlimited access to his wallet

2. His understanding of her frequent headaches

but..as a bonus he should adhere to these rules:

3. Will watch rom-cons and chick flicks

4. Loves to shop only in the fanciest malls.. and we are talking 5 hours at a time and will patiently wait as she tries on clothes and rush back to the racks to get her different sizes

5. Will do dishes and dust (cleaning toilet bowl is a plus)

6. Lets her have the remote (I know that's a tough one!)

Yeah, good luck with THAT!

Behind every great man is a great woman.

Men have traits. Women do too. The current police state wants us to pretend this isnt the case, but it is.

Good women compliment men, and help build great families. I couldnt imagine anything but abject failure as a father if my wife wasnt around to make things work.

robertoaribas says

NEVER brings the girl back here. EVER

This shows a lack of trust. This also shows that you do not believe in goodness or good character.

This tells me what I've always suspected. You like to control others. You like to make them do what you want. And you would be willing to suggest to someone to deny their wife an experience for deceptive reasons.

Wow. Fascinating.

Mark D says

Peter P says

Women from developing countries do not have a sense of humor.

a man only needs 3 things from his woman:

1) good food

2) sex anytime

3) silence

A good wife is a funny soulmate.

robertoaribas says

more bullshit, I've never seen people have a better time than in the philippines. A karaoke machine and some friends, a few cheap gallons of beer, and in a no running water shack, everybody has fun.

That is not the same as a sense of humor.

They don't even get puns.

I can't respect women who see no ironies and/or parodies in life.

robertoaribas says

Even China and Russia and Vietnam all gave up on your dumbass theories of communist property rights.

Unless they are after your stuff. The extent of selective enforcement in those countries is mind-boggling.

If you don't like women in the US just head North. There is much to like aboot ladies in Canada.

robertoaribas says

You're boring and stupid.

Swearing, ad hominem attacks, and waxing about how great life is in other countries.

I never said communism and no property rights. However, you may think the use of rentier means commie. NOPE. You dont get it.

What I dont want is YOU using MY MONEY to leverage to EXPLOIT ME. Why should you take credit to buy up all the resources, basically, buy up the watering hole, and charge a toll?

If you are really daddy Warbucks, BUY the property. Rent it out, and dont try everything in your power to reduce your tax load and deny improvements to tenants to skim off the top.

The notion of property rights when if everything defaults all the paper (titles and deeds) would end up in the banks hands is hardly individual liberty.

In fact, you're benefiting from a very sophisticated version of socialized risk.

Communists are foolish ideologues. On the other side of the spectrum are the rapists. People who climb to the top by stepping on everyone on the way up, not uplifting people.

You are the same kind of person that kept Tucker (the automibile guy) down. Any threat to how your business operates, kill it. Any way possible.

Never-mind that by keeping tucker down the american car industry made itself long term noncompetitive, by pushing down innovation and change for the better to keep the status quo.

Wage slavery to overpriced housing in an economy made from disposable income is stupid. It makes it hard for people like me, people who need time to innovate, work extra hard at making the next best thing wrapped in a greedy business model for you banking types.

Cure for cancer? No, cant have that, we have to make money off of the cure before we can release it.

You remind me of this guy:

http://www.youtube.com/embed/PUx4ZoiGgps

Stop blaming investors for all the problems. They are merely responding to the market. Besides, greed is right. Greed drives the human evolution.

Ambition is good, greed isn't.

And just to make it clear because some people don't know the difference.

ex.
Ambition: Starting your own successful company.
Greed: Your employees make minimum wage and no benefits.

you didn't start that company

Success in business/life: Doing what others cant do, doing it better/faster/cheaper/ and/or in the most desired manner.

Failure in business/life: Trading self-respect for success. Ever.

epitaph says

And just to make it clear because some people don't know the difference.

ex.

Ambition: Starting your own successful company.

Greed: Your employees make minimum wage and no benefits.

They are the same thing. You do what it takes to make your business successful. Employees can choose to work for the conditions or not.

That said, treating people well usually pays dividends. But it is a separate issue.

Bap33 says

you didn't start that company

Success in business/life: Doing what others cant do, doing it better/faster/cheaper/ and/or in the most desired manner.

Failure in business/life: Trading self-respect for success. Ever.

Very well said.

Peter P says

They are the same thing. You do what it takes to make your business successful. Employees can choose to work for the conditions or not.

That said, treating people well usually pays dividends. But it is a separate issue.

If treating people well worked then minimum wage wouldn't exist since all successful businesses would pay their employees a fair wage. This scenario is obviously far from reality. They aren't the same thing.

epitaph says

Peter P says

They are the same thing. You do what it takes to make your business successful. Employees can choose to work for the conditions or not.

That said, treating people well usually pays dividends. But it is a separate issue.

If treating people well worked then minimum wage wouldn't exist since all successful businesses would pay their employees a fair wage. This scenario is obviously far from reality. They aren't the same thing.

Yes. Abolish minimum wage!

If the natural wage ends up being lower then it is just a market reality.

And market wage is always fair.

there is no such thing as "fair" as wanted by equal out-comers. All that American freedom allows is equal chances to fail, not equal chances to succeed. People are born naked, and that is the only part that is the same and fair. Some win the DNA lottery, some win the birthplace lottery, some win the dowery lottery, and some win all three. Aint nothing fair about life other than born naked and a certian death. In America one may overcome their original delt hand, just as one may throw away a full house. It's called liberty ... freedom .... and it's really cool.

poast rhymes with toast, roast, and coast.
post should rhyme with tost, rost, and cost.

From now on, we all really should use "poast" is each post. errrr , I mean poast.

Peter P says

You do what it takes to make your business successful

There are drug dealers and pimps with more ethics. Professional gambling has more ethics the securities and equities trading and management.

Gambling is named after the activity.

Securities and Equities are named in a way that suggests that its anti-gambling.

but it is.

"Business" today is just B2B or B2C rape. Business used to be a side effect of living your life - eg, a blacksmith doing this thing, vs now, an unhappy raping consumerist trying to rape more to get more bling and pig feed from the hopper.

Rarely are people able to make a living doing what they want to do. So they pretend to be something they are not to put a rof over their head and to put food on the table.

The indians of old put up a pole and a leather hide to make shelter happen.

Now people with an education, training, know how, with knowledge many times that of that of an indian of old cant even shelter themselves in our rotten police state.

epitaph says

Ambition is good, greed isn't.

Conspicuous consumption is the motivator these days. This makes people very ambitious and greedy.

Wise words by the immortal recording artist, Kenny Rogers. All of life contains risk. Wisdom and 'life skills' are your greatest asset.

'The Gambler'

On a warm summer's evenin' on a train bound for nowhere,
I met up with the gambler; we were both too tired to sleep.
So we took turns a starin' out the window at the darkness
'Til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak.

He said, "Son, I've made my life out of readin' people's faces,
And knowin' what their cards were by the way they held their eyes.
So if you don't mind my sayin', I can see you're out of aces.
For a taste of your whiskey I'll give you some advice."

So I handed him my bottle and he drank down my last swallow.
Then he bummed a cigarette and asked me for a light.
And the night got deathly quiet, and his face lost all expression.
Said, "If you're gonna play the game, boy, ya gotta learn to play it right.

You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealin's done.

Now Ev'ry gambler knows that the secret to survivin'
Is knowin' what to throw away and knowing what to keep.
'Cause ev'ry hand's a winner and ev'ry hand's a loser,
And the best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep."

So when he'd finished speakin', he turned back towards the window,
Crushed out his cigarette and faded off to sleep.
And somewhere in the darkness the gambler, he broke even.
But in his final words I found an ace that I could keep.

You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealin's done.

Although I didn't get cleaned out during the divorce, had the circumstances been different, I could easily have been destroyed. Until I heard those fatal words directed at me, I never worried about it too much. My reasoning for not being too concerned was that I deeply cared for my spouse. Who would leave someone that cared for them, was always there for them, and made them their #1 priority in most things? I was a naïve schoolboy that believed in the power of love. I believed that we could get through anything together as long as we stuck by one another’s side (mainly because she told me that). I was taught the single most important lesson I’ve ever learned in life. That lesson was to never trust beyond your ability to cope with betrayal’s cost.

Because divorce became such a serious topic in life, for the past couple of years, I've devoted a lot of my free time to reading other’s stories. I’ve read blog after blog by both men and women that have had their lives decimated by betrayal and deceit. What I’ve found is that the statistical and anecdotal evidence scream “think long and hard” when considering marriage. I was incredibly fortunate in how things worked out for me. From what I’ve learned, I’m the rare exception.

I’ll leave this link as a final warning to those considering marriage. I found it by Googling divorce + “destroyed my life”.

http://standingaloneinthesky.blogspot.com/2010/04/how-divorce-destroys-your-life-forever.html

Thanks for creating the thread Peter. I’ve learned something from all the participants.

I got lucky. Second wife made up for all the pain of the first. Beautiful old school and brilliant. Did not want kids. For me she is perfect. And she is Canadian.
First thing you must remember, You will never be her first priority. Her children are (or will be)

/Users/bob/Desktop/Tiffany.jpg

You guys must have been burned real bad!
I may be an exemption but I have been happily married to an american woman for 15 years and we met when we were 14 years old. We have two young kids and we still have date nights and we try to dress nice and have the butterflies. What else can one asked? Also, with tax season I realized how big interests and taxes deductions can be. Buying a new house has been the best move ever. it costs me 3000$ a month in a house that would cost easily 4500$ to rent. No brainer...

Peter P says

If you don't like women in the US just head North. There is much to like aboot ladies in Canada.

This comment is useless without pics.

Wiseman says

You will never be her first priority. Her children are (or will be)

Already pretty high on my long list of reasons not to have kids, but thanks for the reminder!