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Political Humor Thread


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2019 Feb 17, 4:30pm   3,068,617 views  41,341 comments

by Patrick   ➕follow (60)   💰tip   ignore  

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13048   Ceffer   2022 Jan 13, 2:55am  

Can't happen too soon.
13051   charlie303   2022 Jan 13, 6:19am  

Ceffer says


Are there still fences around the other DC buildings?

.


13056   AmericanKulak   2022 Jan 13, 11:54am  

Ceffer says


Walls don't work!
13057   Ceffer   2022 Jan 13, 11:56am  

AmericanKulak says
Walls don't work!

Looking at the live White House cam, it appears to be an enclosed area rather than a perimeter. Maybe they are trying to hide a specific construction project.
13058   Al_Sharpton_for_President   2022 Jan 13, 12:11pm  

Tucker Carlson mocks Pelosi as 'Michael Jackson': He's had a lot of work done since we saw him last'

'Tucker Carlson Tonight' host joked on House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's media appearance on 'Face the Nation. 'No Billy Jean. Apparently, he's given up singing, now he's telling lies about politics.'


https://video.foxnews.com/v/6291016717001?source=patrick.net#sp=show-clips
13059   Eric Holder   2022 Jan 13, 12:20pm  

Ceffer says


BRIDGES NOT WALLS!!!!
13060   Bd6r   2022 Jan 13, 12:51pm  

13061   Bd6r   2022 Jan 13, 12:52pm  

13062   Ceffer   2022 Jan 13, 1:27pm  

LOL! "I asked Mylo what the effect of second and third shots and boosters do and how that changes the End of Cycle table.
Mylo replied: “It is all measurable through hematological testing. The more shots and boosters the imbeciles get, the worse their blood will look under a microscope, and the quicker they will turn to fertilizer.”
"



13063   Ceffer   2022 Jan 13, 1:32pm  

Al_Sharpton_for_President says
Tucker Carlson mocks Pelosi as 'Michael Jackson': He's had a lot of work done since we saw him last'

The Pelosi was probably at home in curlers speaking either through mike or recorded sound stage, and this was her animated CGI puppet to give the appearance of a live performance. Everybody is making fun of it. CGI puppet looks better than the real drunken psychotic bitch.
13064   Patrick   2022 Jan 13, 1:50pm  



"Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that." - George Carlin
13065   Eric Holder   2022 Jan 13, 1:54pm  

Patrick says


LOL, in the summer of 2020 I had the audacity to fall asleep on the beach in Cardiff. Woke up to a lecture from a fucking lifeguard who walked half a fucking mile from his perch to inform me that I can't sleep, lie down or even sit while on the beach because of Covid and that I must either start walking/running/swimming/surfing or GTFO.
13076   richwicks   2022 Jan 13, 9:26pm  

Ceffer says


Haha, I think it's more likely that sun would explode before Monday before I saw our government and the criminal syndicate that runs it tell the truth.
13078   Ceffer   2022 Jan 13, 10:45pm  

richwicks says
Haha, I think it's more likely that sun would explode before Monday before I saw our government and the criminal syndicate that runs it tell the truth.



Yeah, there's a whole information industry now based on dangling the hopium carrot. It's always just next week or next month etc. Only worthwhile sharing in case that beyond some reasonable hope, it actually happens and one can go WTF!
13079   Patrick   2022 Jan 14, 12:20am  

https://therightscoop.com/watch-rubio-makes-epic-statement-about-january-6th-that-dems-are-sure-to-hate/?source=patrick.net


Here’s part of what Rubio said:

I don’t care how many candlelight vigils and musical performances you have from the cast of Hamilton, you’re not going to convince most normal and sane people that our government last year was almost overthrown by a guy wearing a Viking hat and speedos.
13081   Patrick   2022 Jan 14, 10:09am  

https://babylonbee.com/news/pfizer-ceo-condemns-scotus-ruling-as-a-clear-violation-of-our-constitutional-right-to-billions-in-profits?source=patrick.net





NEW YORK, NY—Responding to a 6-3 SCOTUS decision striking down President Biden's unconstitutional vaccine mandate, Pfizer's CEO Albert Bourla took to CNN to condemn the ruling, which he says "violates our God-given constitutional right to produce experimental drugs and use the full power of government to force the entire population to inject them into their bodies."

"I know private citizens are supposed to have rights," said Bourla, "but what about the right of corrupt, multi-billion-dollar mega-corporations that are in bed with governments all around the world? What about our right to make billions and billions of dollars by forcing you to take a drug, even if you don't need it and it kills you? I thought this was AMERICA!"

Bourla confirmed that if everyone on earth isn't forced to take his new upcoming Omicron vaccine, he may not be able to afford his next payment on his flying yacht, which also doubles as a casino and brothel.

"Have some empathy for drug company CEOs like me," he said.

Dr. Fauci concurred with Bourla's opinion and announced that his next engineered virus will be much stronger in order to compel more people to take the vaccine. Pfizer's stock fully recovered within minutes of the announcement.

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